To absolutely hate living in Surrey

[Bestofthebest]

I guess I have been here too long. Am 4 weeks away from escape to a very different part of the British Isles. All anyone seems to do here is go on about their sodding house price, how important their job is, the same one that has them getting the 0605 train like lemmings everyday. Socially people I habe found unfriendly and insular. It is practically a crime to be anything other than a Tory, but you can't show any interest in politics. The only acceptable subjects of conversation are how great you are, your job, Southern Rail and rugby. I hate it so very much I just hope there is a different world out there.

I fucking love living in Surrey.

Iced Someone posted a thread on here once asking if it was safe to drive through Aldershot at night time

Orange!

I live in Croydon, which is Surrey

No it isn't, it's a London borough.

It may be a London borough, but it doesn't have a London postcode. The London/Home Counties borders are kind of impossible to categorise.

I lived in Morden (horrible - don't do it) which was also Surrey but in the London borough of Merton. Although, to me, it didn't feel like London or Surrey it was a dump.

It's not just Surrey. The whole South East is a steaming pile of shit.

I'm the only one that complains about Southern as no other fecker at the school gates works!!

And parts of the East Midlands! OP, your nightmare is my nightmare. I wish we'd never moved from Yorkshire. My fellow schol mums are money & appearance obsessed, all talking about diets and TOWIE. They only speak to me now because I upgraded from a Ford to a Merc. It's shameful.

So far I have been told I am generalising, am a prat, the problem is me and my attitude. Maybe it is, but it doesn't change how I feel one bit, in fact it reinforces it. I just hope I can one day find somewhere I can be happy.

Hmm, whilst the op shouldn't have generalised an entire county based on her own experiences I am a bit at some of the responses. I think it's perfectly possible to live in a place and find it difficult to move beyond the main 'type' of person in that area (for want of a better word). When working full time with a family it is difficult to find the time to put yourself out there and make a conscious effort to meet new people and I'm sure it's even harden when the majority of people you meet are fundamentally different to yourself. I know how the OP feels - we lived in a town for 10 years and only knew a handful of families that we had anything in common with. So yes, whilst there were friendly people and I had great friends, the overall experience of living there wasn't brilliant as building those friendships was a lot harder than in other places I've lived. So OP YANBU to feel the way you feel I don't think.

As an aside, can we take the people of Surrey's outrage on this thread as a reminder than when people make sweeping statements about 'the north' it is not appreciated. If you don't like stereotypes being made about one county then please don't make them about half the country.

How bizarre you must mix with very insecure people, I live in Surrey and house prices are never discussed in fact money is never discussed it is Vulgar. People don't talk about their jobs either, I hate mine so have nothing to say about it, I certainly have no desire to hear about the minutiae of friends jobs either...

Don't let the door hit you on the arse on the way out

bestof out of curiosity where have you been happy living?

I grew up in Surrey in the 60s/70s, it was pretty horrible then; I couldn't wait to get away and escaped to central London in my early twenties. I never thought I'd go back, but got married and dh owned a flat in NE Surrey so I moved in there. It was still all 'aren't I wonderful, look what I've got'. We now live in Devon, which is OK. I miss London desperately and would go back to NE Surrey simply because I could get into central London in less than 20 minutes from there.

Go on OP, tell us where youre moving to

I've lived in a place where there are people obsessed with Southern Rail, rugby, the price of property etc. So crashingly dull.

I've also been lucky enough to live in a place where the people are interesting, have many different jobs/hobbies, can talk endlessly about more or less any subject under the sun and I have made many good, solid friendships.

Strangely, it's the same place. A town already mentioned on this thread, in Surrey.

People are people, wherever you go. You will find what you're looking for, but don't ever discount an entire county (town/country/continent) based on a select few, otherwise you'll spend your whole life looking.

What's wrong with Rugby??

'It's not what happens to you, but how you deal with it that matters'
If anyone is unhappy, change it.
Everyone sees things differently and therefore have their own opinions, it is not up to others to dismiss those views, because they are not in that persons shoes, it's not helpful for anyone to get upset because they have a different view.
OP where did you live before, where you were happy?
Many of us have thought of moving/changing jobs/lifestyle, it's a very personal matter, an individual is an individual and they are entitled to an individual opinion.
So shut up you happy people who want to act/live in a particular way and give kind advice not backlash....... Touchy... Get a life..!!

Haha! Godalming-er born and bred here. If you want to take some of those dead-eyed commuters with you when you go, that would be lovely.

FFS, all the threads I read on here asking where the "best" places to move in Surrey are, where's got the easiest commute, where are the best schools, where can I park to get to X station by Shit O'clock - of course we're drowning in affluent people who commute into London on the Misery Train at 06:18 and don't have the time or energy to contribute to an actual community when they get home. Of course those people are obsessed with their work when it takes 16 hours of their day to get there, do it, get home. Of course those people have contributed to the property nightmare around here that has become a TOTAL obsession. Of course that means that young people are priced out of the area, and of course that means we're overwhelmingly Tory-flavoured.

PS. I just came back after 7 years in West London to live with my hyper-political, labour-voting, retired teacher mother. If you're looking for a socialist enclave populated by artisans and bohemians, you've taken a wrong turn. And you'll hate it when there's rugby on at Twickers.

Hang on a sec, you are surprised at the responses?
Op generalised in her title, said negative things about the residents in her OP and then continued in the same vain.

And posters are surprised that residents took umbrage at these nasty sweeping generalisations.

Yet if the op had written the exact same thread about, say, Doncaster Oblomov I imagine the tone would be quite different...

I know plenty of "dead-eyed commuters", myself included, who are also active members of their communities in the evenings and at weekends (we even take the odd day off to do things, shock!) - everything from Cubs/Brownie leaders, local politics, WI, voluntary work, school PTA, school reading, committee members, coaching children's sports teams, biking clubs, running clubs, the list is endless really. There are people that just sit around moaning on the internet and facebook, of course, but life is out there for anyone wherever you live, imo.

OP, I sort of hear you. I'm in the same boat kind of.

Moved from London to N Surrey to find house to raise imminent arriving baby, lovely neighbourhood, gorgeous scenery, quaint old buildings, but after going to umpteen baby groups I've found scant evidence of folk who differ from the favoured subjects you describe (house prices, schools etc). It's quite a change from where I used to live which was N N N London (basically Herts).

Two things:

1. I've developed bitchy resting face since the move and my inverted class prejudice has done me no favours. I project my dislike too much and it won't get me anywhere. I've had to wind it in to make any connections. And whilst I've not found anyone on my wavelength, at last I've made some connections and you know what? They're OK even if they've never heard of Siouxsie and the Banshees, OK, I digress

1. We are moving country before our DC start school. I am horrified at the bloody minded competition from what seems like baby's birth for nursery places, primary places, grammar school places. It's just too much competitiveness and hothousing. Is the rest of England like this or just the Home Counties?

Anyway, I feel you OP. I do. But bear in mind that you may be projecting your hatred and it won't win you any friendships. I've come to terms with this v v late in the day 11 months until we move

Run run and don't look back! The most passive aggressive place I've ever lived and I moved around various parts of the county.
I have to admit I carried the anger around while I was there getting uptight about parking issues and traffic and general entitlement, moved to sw and feel so much happier, free and less angry!
I still have friends in Surrey and that suits them but it's not for everyone so just move if you can!

Then that post wasn't about you, schbittery

I posted earlier before I noticed you lived nr Croydon.
IMO Croydon is NOT Surrey! It's outer London really.

Surrey to me is Dorking, Leatherhead, Guildford, all small villages on the outskirts of them, and further south towards Hants and Sussex.

I went for an interview once in Croydon when I was living in deeper leafy Surrey and hated it as it was so urban.