To absolutely hate living in Surrey

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I guess I have been here too long. Am 4 weeks away from escape to a very different part of the British Isles. All anyone seems to do here is go on about their sodding house price, how important their job is, the same one that has them getting the 0605 train like lemmings everyday. Socially people I habe found unfriendly and insular. It is practically a crime to be anything other than a Tory, but you can't show any interest in politics. The only acceptable subjects of conversation are how great you are, your job, Southern Rail and rugby. I hate it so very much I just hope there is a different world out there.

I'm in a similar area to you (from what you say) and don't recognise your description. However I don't like it here. I find it too suburban and dull. And I detest the commute. Which unfortunately means I can bang on about Southern with the best if 'em.

I grew up in Surrey and I couldn't wait to leave. When I go back to visit people talk about home improvements, house prices and cars.

I would argue that the south-east of England generally is pretty much obsessed with finance owing to the high cost of living.

It is hard to mix with people if their ideologies clash with yours too flagrantly. I don't think it would be my bag either to live in Surrey.

Wherever you live though there will always be something. I left London after decades down there and there is plenty wrong with where I now live. A very traditionalist place with narrow minded people. That said I know I wouldn't wish to hack living in the fast lane again!

Nowhere is perfect. I hope you find your new location much better for you.

We moved from London last year. Should have done it years ago. Our friends do talk about house prices when they visit. "you bought this, and had change" . Six minute walk from station, 40 minutes to City - took longer on the district line - DH does leave at 6.20 though but only because he drives in and that does take 25 minutes more.

I grew up in a different country and now live in Surrey and regularly spend time in the Yorkshire Dales. But Surrey is my 5 county not including living in London. Every single Home County I lived is the same. Fairly affluent and very aspirational. (Massive generalisation) I don't see anything wrong with that.

Yorkshire people are more to the point, no nonsense and down to earth. The place is not as urban and more ruggedy.
I think it's like trying to compare apples with pears.
I love both and people in both.

I think you're being unfair to classify an entire and pretty large county on the basis of where you live.
But that's your prerogative - it's rather like the Americans who think all UK folk have morning tea, wear bowler hats to work and still speak English in a received pronunciation fashion - a dreadful stereotype, that will apply to some but not, by any stretch of the imagination, all.

Maybe it's you OP - can you not manage to engage people in more interesting topics of conversation? I live in Surrey, everyone is very friendly and we never talk about the things you've mentioned. Oh and I'm not a Tory either.

It's weird cos I think the people who happily slag off an entire county are the ones who sound up their own arses.

This.

I have lived in Surrey for the last 20 years and don't recognise it from your description OP. I don't think I've ever discussed house prices, I have lots of lovely political friends and can only think of one person from my friends and colleagues who is interested in Rugby. I've found it a friendly, diverse place to live and wouldn't want to move anywhere else. My ten year olds four best friends are all from different countries and all speak different languages at home which is giving her a great window on the world. Maybe you were happy to stick in the bubble you describe and should have tried harder to seek out some like-minded people. Anyway - you won't be missed with such a negative attitude. I hope you give your new location a better shot!

Off you go then. Leave Surrey to those of us that love living here!

I agree with you about surrey. There are some good points but the other thing I hated was the horrendous traffic not far from where you are. I found people very unfriendly on the whole, but that's similar in many places. Anyway hope you enjoy the new area!

I've lived in Surrey for 14 years, having lived in SE London and a major northern city before.

I find it stifling. I love my job, but as soon as DS is at uni next year I want to move. I have some lovely friends but everyone is so apolitical. When I go over to see DD in west London I see what I'm missing. And it's very, very white in my town. I was shocked when we moved here.

Bye then. Close the door on your way out.
I agree with the pp who said that people who generalise, like the British having tea and wearing a bowler, just make themselves look ridiculous.

Surrey is fine, good points and bad, like any other. I've lived in lots of UK places and abroad and they all have pro's and con's.

I can talk most subjects, trains to Waterloo, brexit and bake off included. Or I can talk any subject you chose? Or would you like to talk about Russian poetry and akhmatova? Chekhov?
What are you going to talk about when you get to your new home?
You sound like a bit of a twit to be honest.

Of course one county isn't all the same and so generalising may seem unfair. However, some counties seem to have more than their fair share of 'types' who dominate that area and so it appears that the whole county is of that ... nature. And so it goes on...

There are places in Yorkshire now becoming dominated by 'types' of people, but Yorkshire's a big place. I can safely say that Shropshire is full of very provincial types and very hard to penetrate if you're an outsider (classed as someone who isn't a 4th or 5th generation in some places).

I've moved to somewhere very rural and the amount of times I've been asked 'are you on holiday?' in the local shops is unreal. All because I tried to buy a weekend paper that are all ordered in advance by the locals - because it's a 'community shop, this'. I didn't understand, you see We live in what is locally known as "Cedric's house"* and it will be 'his' house until about 2216. But it's a lovely area, despite the fact that everyone looks suspiciously at us 'foreigners'.

*name changed

Where are we supposed to live then? If Surrey is so stifling? Where in west London is so fab, that we can afford?

The question OP is what are you going to do about it? Are you living there because of work? IME most people move / live in the south for the better job opportunities. I moved south decades back due to the lack of jobs in my profession further north. I lived in Surrey for 10 years as a singleton. I felt an outsider as it was very family orientated, but then so are most places except central London and big cities.

I think there is an element of truth in what you say, but people are people wherever they live. Where I live now - broadly home counties- there are people from all over the UK who have relocated, mainly for work. It's still 'like Surrey' in many ways.

IME there are few people who have the absolute choice of living where they really want to if they are employed and want to get on- most of them migrate south.

I think you need to make more effort to find people like yourself- they are out there!

What pollyperky said. However, I have to say that since I moved away from there, I've never been happier. I love where I am now but the pace is almost standstill in comparison. The shop shuts at 1pm on a Saturday and they still have half day closing on a Wednesday. But it's relaxing...

Can't have everything!

What's the old story -
man travels to a new town and asks a native what the people are like. He was asked 'what were they like in your old town?'
Man ' cold, unfriendly and mean'
Native ' I think you'll find them the same here'.
Man moves on, not wanting to live there.

A second man comes along and asks the native 'what are people like here?'
Native 'what were people like in your old town?'
second Man 'they were lovely, generous, friendly'
Native 'I think you'll find that people are the same here'
So second Man moves in

Moral of the story - people are the same everywhere; how you perceive them is down to you!

BTW I live in South Surrey

Yes there is a Diffrent world to your clearly Very middle class one

My friend lives in Woking in a council flat she is a single mum and votes UKIP and no one talks house prices because no one owns there house

I used to live on surrey. I moved to lincoln amd am so much happier. People seem happier and so much friendlier. Love living in a small city with green all around us. Local markets that aren't crazy prices and only 2 hours from London by train. Am never going to leave!

How rude and judgemental to slag off an entire county on mumsnet. You're obviously just looking to upset people.

I can talk most subjects, trains to Waterloo, brexit and bake off included. Or I can talk any subject you chose? Or would you like to talk about Russian poetry and akhmatova? Chekhov?
What are you going to talk about when you get to your new home?
You sound like a bit of a twit to be honest.

Sorry Oblomov but that makes you sound like a bit of a twit and an oboxious one too. You sound a bit bitter, esp your other post where you ask where in West London you could go that you could afford that's so great.

Such a shame.

Depends where you live, I suppose.

I live on a Surrey council estate that everyone avoids because it's got poor people and immigrants and travellers

It's the same as any other council estate I've lived on - great community, friendly and helpful neighbours.

As a childminder, I do see a lot of stressed commuter parents and one or two of them are a bit limited in conversation - especially when their train has been cancelled!

I see a lot of "we're moving to Surrey - where are the nicest/best areas with the easiest commute and top performing schools?" threads on here. To be honest, if you move to those areas and avoid the poorer areas, what do you expect??

I live in Surrey, not far from Croydon. The OP must live a very narrow life if everyone she meets is as she describes. For me part of the appeal of the area is the diversity of the people. In our 20 house road we have African, Jamaican, Indian, Chinese, Japanese, South African and Irish families. Not much swishy blonde hair there! And they are just the ones I know. I have a feeling that the OP is projecting and when she moves away she might find she takes the dullness with her

And Southern Rail are a disgrace.

Tanith we received an invitation to attend a council meeting in the village hall because the council are building 15 housing association houses in the area and the invitation stated 'Join us in letting the council know this area is not for those kind of people!' Priceless!!!