DS emptying DD's bin?

[bloomburger]

DS's job is to empty the bins in the house the day before rubbish collection day. He has just told me that DH said he is not to empty DD's bin as it has sanitary towels in it. They are in bloody plastic sanitary towel bags so aren't smelly and aren't going to leap out and bite him or rub blood off onto him for cripes sake!

AIBU to tell DH and DS that he can bloody well empty the bin and carry on doing so each week regardless of its contents?

Hopefully at one stage in his life he will have a wife and I can't imagine her falling for his not being able to empty the bathroom bin because it may have used sanitary (adequately covered) protection in it.

So dd doesn't mind.
Ds doesn't mind.
There shouldn't be a problem then.

DH empties bin with my used sanitary towels in. Dh has seen all minds of fluids come out of my fanjo (he didn't think that disgusting either ) when I gave birth to dd so a bit of blood wrapped up in a bag doesn't bother him at all. He also buys my products if he's the one doing the shopping. I thought most men were ok with buying sanitary products now? Are a lot still silly about it?

I would never ask anyone to get my supplies, male or female, to be fair. I don't know people in RL who shit in front of their partners either, but it appears to be common on here.

Each to their own, but I don't particularly want to share every function with anyone.

And bodily fluids can be fairly unappealing if they aren't your own!

Take sanpro out of the equation. Who wants to try and pick through a bin for recycling at the risk of touching waxy cotton buds or manky week old bits of cotton wool? I certainly don't even if it's mine. And this is from someone who uses cloth nappies, so not phased by bodily fluids! It is the week old nature of it all that gives me the shivers. Just don't use that bin if you need to recycle. Carry them down separately, because this is really a scuzzy job!

And again, why is it okay for the DD to be too embarrassed to take the bags out herself but she expects someone else to?

Her DS may be fine with it, but it's just not normal to go manually rooting through a weeks worth of rubbish to take out recyclables. I deal with the rubbish in my household and I'm not going to stick my hand in anyone's bin! Make it simpler. Every bathroom bin has a liner, and gets tied up and disposed of. People can make the effort to take their recyclables out to the recycling bin, or have a small central bin for paper and plastic in the kitchen.

It's not a badge of honour. It's the same as me asking him to pick up loo roll. I just don't see how it's any kind of deal at all!

But the DS isn't being asked to carry little individual purple bags out, several times a day. I can totally understand why the DD doesn't want to do that - it does draw attention to it, and she might be embarrassed, and it's also just a hassle! The DS has to carry a big bag full of rubbish, including the little purple bags inside it, once a week, along with several other rubbish bags - not drawing attention to anything.

"We have to recycle loo roll tubes and shampoo bottles, these are also in the bin but easily pick out able so not feasible to just use a bin liner."

That's ludicrous. Recyclable waste goes straight into the large recycling bin. All bins in the house, large or small, have liners. Straightforward, simple and no 'picking through bins' necessary.

abbsismyhero "I throw my recycling out the window into the main recycling bin its more fun that way >off topic

Well then why can't the dd carry her own larger bag out one week a month crochet? Or even just take out her own recycling that week!

But it's her waste and she isn't being asked to parade in front of the neighbours wearing a bell and shouting 'unclean'! And as everyone in the house is so totally cool with periods except the DH, then it shouldn't be an issue. Leaving it lying around for a week is fucking rank!

Ooh! Goody. Another bathroom bins thread.

• I don't specifically provide guest sanpro for visiting menstruators though there are tampons and pads of various sizes left over from when I used to do it. You'd have to ask me unless you wanted to hunt through my many bathroom cabinets. I don't mind if you hunt through the bathroom cabinets, though crammed in things will probably avalanche out of some of them. I'd ask you to put those things back.

• I would prefer it if visitors didn't put used tampons or sanitary towels in my bathroom bin because I empty it infrequently. But if they made a mistake and the tampon was in a plastic bag, I wouldn't be annoyed. In return I expect them to be unannoyed by putting a loo-roll wrapped tampon in their bag until they leave. They can use as much of my loo roll as they like so long as they leave a reasonable amount for the purposes of arse wiping.

• When I menstruated I wrapped tampons in loo paper and put them in the general waste which is disposed of daily. I think OP's daughter should do this.

• I go through my bathroom bin to sort recyclables from ear waxy cotton buds, dental floss and the occasional plaster with dried blood or blister fluid on without a HazMat suit. Maybe this has kept my immune system in a constant state of readiness and is the reason why I rarely get colds.

• My husband has gone down on me while I was having a period. It's always been when he dived down before I had a chance to say. I don't think he particularly enjoyed it, and I always overrode his protests because I couldn't relax and so wasn't enjoying it either. But at least he always did the gentlemanly thing of attempting to finish what he started rather than leaping from the bed with a bloody grimace screaming: 'Unclean!'

Personally, I would be expecting DD to wrap them up and put them in the bin downstairs, not leaving them in a litter bin upstairs, but that's just me.

She could! But if it's the DS's job to do it and he wants to, why not? I was just responding to someone saying why expect him to do that job, if she was too embarrassed to be taking them out to the outside bin all the time - they aren't comparable at all.

Seems obvious to me just to have a central recycling bin and bring things down to that as needed, and have bin liners that are brought out by whoever is emptying the bins each week. It's going through them for the recyclables that seems a bit grim, rather than carrying out a bin liner that has wrapped up sanpro in it.

If she wants to empty her own bin each week to be more private, then great, that would work too. I might have chosen that myself so that everyone didn't necessarily know I had my period. But doesn't mean there's anything wrong with someone else emptying the bin liner.

I don't get the recycling part of this. We have a bathroom bin for sanpro, but if someone finishes a loo roll, the tube goes in the recycling bag. If someone finishes shampoo, the bottle goes in the black box. The bathroom bin gets emptied once a week, but on period week it's every day. Liner tied up, into outside bin, done.

OP, I'm guessing you wished you hadn't posted this topic. YANBU imo, although having a separate recycling bin might make things s but simpler.

Yes Janethegirl2, I am rather!

DS has no problem with his job and he doesn't want more bins to empty. DD has no problem with current arrangement.

DH is a dinosaur, a product of a father who visibly flinches if you say bloody (ironically) or shit, who never spoke about sex to any of his children, who I'm sure doesn't even know menstruation exists. I've taught him quite a lot sour biology and that bodily fluids aren't terribly unclean. He's nearly there but it seems not quite.

He did think you had to change the bed every time you had sex when we first met. I told him he'd either need to get handier with the washing machine or buy a lot more bed linen!

How many bins do people have? I have one bathroom bin - lidless; the horror, the horror.

Otherwise I have a plastic bag hanging on the inside of cupboard door handle in the kitchen that gets thrown in the general rubbish dumpster at the end of the street daily. Since the 5p carrier bag charge I take loads of those flimsy plastic veg produce bags and put rubbish in those. Therefore I have two or three to throw away. The waste contains nothing more hazardous than cat litter.

Recycling goes in blue plastic sacks - as many as you want - that I store in my shed and is collected from outside my house once a week. If there are too many wine bottles for respectability, I can dispose of them discreetly in the recycling dumpsters on many street corners.

But bodily fluids are generally fairly rank! Theres nothing shameful about them but I don't get why anyone would want someone else dealing with theirs if they had a choice?

OP please, please, please make your DH watch this poem about periods - this woman has this stuff all wrapped up

If he's uncomfortable about it, then he has a right to be! Lots of things make people uncomfortable, it's not for anyone else to tell them they shouldn't be

I have no patience with people like this. Its no different to blood from a plaster or a dressing!

H is the product of a family of women (his dad left when he was v young) where "womens things" were not discussed in front of him. He still flinches at the word Period, and pulls a face. He is getting slightly better now though as a) I refuse to not mention it even though for a long time he tried to convince me I should never say anything in front of him "as there is no need" and b) I have dd's who I have brought up to be as open about these things as I am. Currently there are 4 menstruating women/girls in this house, all of whom are happy to discuss it front of the rest of the family (including my 2 sons, their brothers).

He got stroppy about emptying the bathroom bin until I lost my rag, said 50% of the world do this once a month, fucking get over it. He still doesnt like it but at least he doesnt moan about it anymore.

Incidentally, he thought for years that we had never had sex while I was on my period. He didnt actually vomit when I told that in fact, yes we had, but I sensed it was an option :o

My Ds used to have to sort out the bins when he lived at home. He didn't care what was in the bins. To be fair, the most disgusting things were generally in his bin....mangy fruit skins, yoghurt pots and the like. A nicely bagged condom or sanpro in a bin would have been much more preferable.

Bodily fluids are not rank, they are just....well bodily fluids! Its so childish to say "Ewww!!" about stuff that comes out of everyones bodies on a regular basis!