tipping the waitress

[mummysmummy]

I have a friend that I sometimes meet for coffee or lunch. she rarely tips and when she does its miserly. I feel so embarrassed about this, I make up for it by making up the tip to an acceptable amount and sometimes secretly giving all of it. AIBU to think that tipping, particularly for staff who are low paid, it a good thing to-do.
maybe i should manup about this and tell her not to be such a skinflint

LyingWitchinTheWardrobe- I couldn't agree more. I would definitely go to those kind of restaruantsa than pay their sataff well in the first place and I would even be prepared to pay abit more for my food if I know the staff are getting paid well. At the cafe I used to work at the tips didn't go to the staff and I whole heartedyl feel that the tipping system allows employers to get away with not paying staff a living wage.

Sorry that is meant to say "I would definitely go to restaurants that pay their staff well"

I worked as a waitress when I was at school at the weekends, £4 an hour I was paid.

Without a doubt 10000x more stressful than my degree or my full time job. I mean it depends on the restaurant of course but I hated it. So hot, chefs that shouted and swore, customers that clicked their fingers at you and mangers that expected you to carry massive trays above your head with one hand (I couldn't). It's easy to forget all that when you're eating out but I always tip. Oh and our tips were shared among all (which I think it fair enough) but even a good tip isn't great when split among wait staff, managers and chefs.

I'm a pretty generous tipper (probably stupidly so at times) but don't think I ever tipped for a coffee in the UK.

The tipping issue does my nut. I genuinely dislike having to tip people for basically doing their job. That said if the service is good I will add 10% without feeling too grim about it.

In the US, they expect 15-20% and they automatically add it to the bill in some places. I once had an almighty row because despite the waitress saying I was bitchy and unreasonable they still didn't want to remove the service charge from the bill and once we were chased out of a restaurant down the street because DH genuinely forgot to leave a tip...

I always tip if I've had a meal, be it a restaurant, cafe or pub, unless it's really bad service with horrible waiting staff.

I've been out with a couple of friends who have declined to tip, (fair enough, their prerogative) but who have then tried to reduce their share of the bill to take account of the tip others have left! They were very firmly told that that would not be happening.

I think it's important to show your appreciation if you've had a good customer service experience, and different professions naturally have different expectations for expressing this. You might send a doctor or teacher a card or a little present; retail employees receive bonuses if customers pass positive feedback on to their managers. Restaurants tend to be staffed by people in their teens or working their first jobs for £3.75 an hour. Receiving tips as a thank you for good service means a lot in that situation. It wou don't be appropriate to tip doctors or salaried professionals, as it looks a patronising -- gratitude in these cases is much better expressed through personal notes/a small gift. I definitely don't think tipping should be compulsory though, and should only happen when the service deserves it!

I very very rarely tip in the UK. Only if the service is absolutely fantastic or if my kids make a huge mess...I often leave large tips when we go for dinner with them

Definitely would not tip for a coffee.

I wouldn't tip for a coffee anywhere.

In the U.K. I tip if the service was particularly good or if it was a large order. When in the US I tip 15% standard and 20% for good service. I don't like tipping culture at all.

I've worked as a waitress and i don't think tips should be compulsory...

Nice to receive one, especially if you've given very good service (as I always tried to do) but it is ridiculous to get the hump on if you don't get one. Providing good service is your job, not something to do if you think you'll get extra for it. I hate that attitude that some people in the service industry have, where they will only give their best if they expect a big tip. Have a bit of pride in your work.

In the US, they expect 15-20% and they automatically add it to the bill in some places.

in the US, there is no pretence that it is for service "above and beyond". it's mandatory.

I was at an airport and everything was done through a shiny ipad, where you pay AND tip beforehand. Well, I haven't had the service yet, have I? Of course, you are then put in the uncomfortable position of the person about to serve you knowing what the tip is.