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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what your age cut off point to have a baby is?

404 replies

Mummyyummy2012 · 13/09/2016 21:32

I'm 43 and figure I am probably too old for any more children but deep down in my heart I'd love another...aibu to ask how old you think is too old?

OP posts:
Normandy144 · 13/09/2016 21:41

Had my first days after turning 36 and my 2nd at 38. I'm done! I think if I had started in my early 30s then I would have tried for 3, but I'm happy to stop now.

CakeNinja · 13/09/2016 21:41

Good luck Oly! Flowers

MrsWooster · 13/09/2016 21:41

First at 43, second at 46 so go for it if you really want it.off for lie down as am constantly knackered

Eatthecake · 13/09/2016 21:41

I am 48 and had my 4th baby 7 months ago. I thought I was starting the menopause but I was pregnant.

If you are fit and healthy then you are bit too old

katemess12 · 13/09/2016 21:41

I probably wouldn't want to have another baby after the age of 40. Not even so much because of the risks associated, or the fact that it's harder on your body, but because if you're already got older children, you're close to having freedom from them again. Grin I wouldn't want to start all over again.

I've just had my first child at 25. I'd like to be finished by 30, preferably. But if I had started later, my "end date" would be later too.

Fluffsnuts · 13/09/2016 21:41

35, that's as much about increased risk as it is about age gap to DS though.

Eatthecake · 13/09/2016 21:42

Sorry that should say if you are for and healthy then you are NOT too old

MyBreadIsEggy · 13/09/2016 21:42

I'm 22 and about to have our second baby in 7 weeks time. I think this will probably be our last, but if we did have another, I wouldn't do it after the age of 30, purely because of age gaps between DC's and that I'm loving the fact that when my eldest is 18, I will only be 38, with plenty of time to have a life outside of child-rearing.

CakeNinja · 13/09/2016 21:42

Dead my first 2 pregnancies were definitely a breeze! Third one was shit.

gamerchick · 13/09/2016 21:44

32, I'm 41 now and would rather grate my face off than do it all again. Definitely too old!

headinthecloud · 13/09/2016 21:44

I had my first at 27 and my second at nearly 39. Id say oldest for me is 43 or there abouts

keeptheheid · 13/09/2016 21:44

DD will be 20 when I am 43 Confused scary thought! I sometimes joke about having one a decade.

winewinewhine · 13/09/2016 21:44

I'm 37 and would love another in the next year or two, DP says no though.

expatinscotland · 13/09/2016 21:45

I had my third and last at 37 and that was old enough for me.

Bearfrills · 13/09/2016 21:45

I had my first at 28, now 35 and having my fourth. The plan was to TTC next year, so I'd have been 36 and possibly 37 by the time I conceived and delivered, but this one sort of snuck up on us. I'm from a family where there have been a few 'late' babies, DM had one at almost 39 and my aunt had one at 45.

I think it's a personal decision and provided you feel up to it then there is no right or wrong.

oliversax · 13/09/2016 21:45

I'm 37 and have a 2.5 yr old and 4 month old. Hoping for one more before 40. I don't like to judge other people's choices on the right age but feel like 50s is too old and if you can conceive in your 40s it's definitely not too old.

EvansAndThePrince · 13/09/2016 21:45

Dead probably depends on you/the pregnancy.
I had my first age 22 and am pregnant with my second age 24. No more, no way no how. And that's not just the pregnancy mood talking, after my first I said I'd do it once more and that's it. I LOVE the kids, hate the pregnancies. Might foster in ten years time.

drspouse · 13/09/2016 21:46

Both of mine are adopted but they were placed as small babies and are 44 and 47 years younger than me.
There is a lot of older parent bashing on MN I tend to find. I wonder if people would say I'm too old to have a two year old if they see me at the school gates with her?

TippiNoodlegruder · 13/09/2016 21:46

For me it was 30. I had my youngest 2 months before my 30th and that was just about right. I did feel like the pregnancy with my youngest was the one where I was taken seriously. Maybe it was my age, or the fact dh and I were married which we weren't when I had the others, or something else.

I would never dream of judging anyone on their age when having a baby though, it's a very personal thing.

MrsSnow · 13/09/2016 21:46

I had my first at 39, trying for number 2 at 40.

I guess it deoends on how you and your partner feel but age shouldn't put you off.

monkeywithacowface · 13/09/2016 21:47

30 was my cut off. I'm 39 now and just absolutely couldn't face it now!

Sparklesilverglitter · 13/09/2016 21:47

eatthecake That must of been a shock when you thought it was the menopause

Orwellschild · 13/09/2016 21:47

Is a bit off to say anything earlier than 35, IMO. And older if you can / are happy to. I know each to their own but I'm 33 and am hoping to have my first in next couple of years, and then 2nd by 40. Not all of us have a life where having a child can be done without worrying about work. I have to work to pay my rent, which has inhibited my ability to have a child to date.

I know I'm generalising but I think some people need to stop and think about still very young slightly older ladies who are yet to start their families.

MrsBobDylan · 13/09/2016 21:47

I had my third at 40 and it was my easiest pregnancy. I'm 43 now and weirdly feel less knackered than after no.2. I found a 2 year age gap the hardest physically-a baby and a toddler was soooo hard.no.3 came along when no.2 was four and that age gap was brilliant.

EvansAndThePrince · 13/09/2016 21:47

There is a husband in this btw...looks like I've just been hiring men to impregnate me, should have said OUR first and second Grin

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