...to insiat that certain parents accompany their badly behaved children at my sons party

[caroloro]

So. Last year my son had a whole class party (film and popcorn in a village hall) and two boys in particular caused utter mayhem. I had to move them to a different part of the hall in the end. Now, if I invite them this year, I want to make it clear that I want a parent with them. I can't ignore 20 kids to deal with the behaviour of two. Does this seem unreasonable? Also, how would I put it? Due to the behaviour of your son at my sons party last year, if he's coming this year, I need you or another adult there to take responsibility for managing him? Seems a bit rude! These boys rarely get invited anywhere, bless them, so I don't want to exclude them, but honestly, they're veryvery difficult!

2 of my 5 DC have SEN and never get invited to parties, but they don't behave anywhere near as badly as these 2 you've described. Despite my experience, in your shoes I would just not invite these 2 boys this year.

You have tried to be nice to them and invited them to previous parties but the potential for them to do something really dangerous at a karting party doesn't bear thinking about. What you've described is not normal high spirits but actually quite reckless behaviour.

FWIW we had a girl at DD's party last year whose father insisted on staying and she was a PITA. He did nothing and we didn't feel we could tell her off because he was there. Having the parents there will probably make them worse.

To be honest,I think expecting that many kids to sit and watch a film without there being some disruption is a big ask! Not every child will like the film, or want to sit for nearly two hours at what is supposed to be a birthday party. My daughter and six of her friends were invited to another girls film party. The birthday girl got to choose the film-one that I'd never heard of-and the other girls were expected to sit in near silence for the duration and watch it. They got bored. They didn't like the film and started asking if they were going to play any games, or if they could go off and play somewhere. The birthday girl got very upset and I was told in no uncertain terms by the mother, on pick up, that my daughter was very rude for talking during the film, and getting up off the settee instead of staying put until the end!

Don't invite them!! I wouldn't want a pair of little shits ruining my kid's party.

If you invite them you could end up like the friend of a friend who had a hellish time with a child at her dd's class party

Childs mother " I think you forgot to give little Jonny his party bag"

Friends friend "nope he has behaved like a little shit all afternoon he does not deserve one good day" door closed.

Nb she was leaving the school so was happy to burn bridges. Was half shocked half impressed....

hookiewookie how old was your DD? If over the age of 7 without SN she was being badly behaved and I'm not surprised her mother took umbrage. If younger, then YANBU, small kids shouldn't be expected to sit through a whole film even to be polite.

Op can approach tge parents "Johnny was difficult at both parties I've held, this year it's a go karting party and ds would like Johnny to come, I will require you to supervise him for safety reasons if he goes" The parents reaction will tell you everything you need to know. This shoukd be done before invites go out, so that they are not just left.

hedgehog it was for a tenth birthday party.And that's what her and the other girls were expecting- a party. Not a sit in silence for two hours then go home affair. They were excitable and looking forward to getting together with the party girl and having fun. Her Mum is a teacher and they all got told off like they were her pupils, instead of her thinking " this isn't working...I need to try something else". It wasn't just DD- they were all bored and disappointed.

God, that poor birthday girl, her friends unable to do her choice of activity on her birthday for two hours at age 10! I thought they were going to be about 4!

All it takes,Soloman is for one of them to get fidgety and bored and it has a knock on effect even with 10 year olds! They're still kids and very giggly at that age!

A long not popular movie at 10 is asking a bit much. I'm 34 and don't sit still in sikence through a movie so bot sure why anyone would expect kids to. They giggle, they oohh at the hot guy, they need a wee or drinks.

OP said they did not sit in silence.And none of the other kids had problems with it. Very different giggling, to throwing drinks at another child.

Exactly, op said that they did not sit in silence and not allowed to talk, they were talking and moving about, not behaving like these two and ruining the party.