Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the whole pregnancy thing could be altered?

232 replies

DerekSprechenZeDick · 10/09/2016 14:25

This whole pregnancy thing is shit ain't it? Let's be honest

They are made in a fun way (if you are lucky) but then 9 month of just shit.

I think pregnancy should be fun and have perks. Instead I'm stuck in bed due to pelvic pain, a baby who appears to be an athletic octopus and heartburn that makes me want to rip my chest out.

I would like to grow my baby attached to me but be able to unattach should I fancy a piece of shark or a rum.

So I could unstrap the bump, strap it to the dad and I could have a break. The bump would be more like a side car maybe Grin

What would you change about pregnancy?

OP posts:
MumiTravels · 11/09/2016 12:22

I think we should take it in turns. So last time I carried DS now it should be DH turn. Flip a coin for the first one and alternate then on Grin

Saying that I'm pretty good so far. Only some mild nausea.

Original poster
DerekSprechenZeDick · 11/09/2016 12:47

I think men should get all the symptoms we do but slightly worse.

OP posts:
Afreshstartplease · 11/09/2016 13:02

Only slightly?

Danglyweed · 11/09/2016 13:24

I think there should be extra padding round your rib cage, hips etc instead of on your arse/legs etc.

An actual proper set date that youll give birth, none of this prem or overdue shit.

derek I went ranting to my gp about how my birthday bottle of jack daniels was ruined due to the shitty heartburn I was suffering for weeks.... yup I was 28weeks Blush gave birth at 34. As skinny as a rake ffs. Heartburn should be abolished!

OnceThereWasThisGirlWho · 11/09/2016 14:56

Derek I think men should get all the symptoms we do but slightly worse.

Nooo that would be awful. Like when you're both ill so the slightly less sick one has to do stuff. Forget man flu, man pregnancy would be a right pain.

However, as mentioned upthread, it would be good to have some kind of device to simulate the symptoms for half an hour or so, to be applied if men forget to be considerate.

PeachBellini123 · 11/09/2016 15:50

Oh pinky the bump touchers! My MIL patted me on the stomach and went 'look at that!' Hmm She's a portly lady so I could have done the same back to her Grin

The comments on the bump are grating as well, in the course of one day I had a colleague tell me my bump looked big then later on another colleague said my baby must be small as I wasn't showing Hmm I went from feeling huge to worrying there was something wrong with the baby's growth Blush

PinkyOfPie · 11/09/2016 16:00

To help re the bump touching. This is a picture of me and my latest buy.

Not really, I wish that was me. But I do have that t-shirt Grin I know it's corny but it saves me having to say 'get off me'

To think the whole pregnancy thing could be altered?
AButterflyLightsBesideUs · 11/09/2016 16:21

I think we should have some kind of little fish tank of amniotic fluid that you could just sprinkle food into daily and you could watch them grow and see that they were ok.

Not bastarding hyperemesis and second trimester losses.

Also, the whole issue of the squashed bladder needs addressing. Along with the total fucking exhaustion.

Original poster
DerekSprechenZeDick · 11/09/2016 16:27

Oh like those sea monkeys?!

OP posts:
mineofuselessinformation · 11/09/2016 16:29

How about we're hooked up to a special machine as soon as we find out we're pregnant (special hospitals provided for this), and kept lightly dozing so we can wake occasionally to enjoy the nicer thing of pregnancy (first kicks etc), and then woken fully just as we're in 'proper' labour? Seems like a win-win to me! Grin

Bigfam · 11/09/2016 16:33

I love those little sea monkeys derek! Ds had some for christmas but they died last year 😦
There's a belly toucher at my kids school, except she has stepped it up a level, she rubs cradles & puts her face next to my bump (complete with cooing!) Hmm

Bigfam · 11/09/2016 16:47

I've also not seen my fajewgee in a few weeks, I've tried trimming it blind but I'm pretty sure it looks like a badly sheared sheep (with rabies)

AButterflyLightsBesideUs · 11/09/2016 16:49

Yep, like the sea monkeys. Would suit me nicely. I could potter around doing what I liked and have a peek in every so often minus all the shite symptoms. At the end, just lift them out.

ermmm · 11/09/2016 17:10

First symptom of pregnancy was sickness. 25 weeks tomorrow and it hasn't eased one bit😤.

bump feelers step away or I will feel u up aswell!!!!!'

Rachyabbadabbadoo · 11/09/2016 17:48

The tests that you blindly have (at least I did) just because pretty much everyone has them. And then you get results that terrify you, along with a range of choices that are all equally terrifying.

Shona52 · 11/09/2016 18:02

My pregnancy was terrible too. Was sick from day one (and I mean day one)?of the pregnancy, morning, noon and night for the whole time. I can do relate to the heartburn it's just the worst.

Labour was just as bad

But it's so worth everything I went through. Just not sure I could do it again

PinkyOfPie · 11/09/2016 18:04

Just remembered in my first pregnancy my nan (who is sadly not with us anymore) actually coughed with her hand over her mouth (a real phlemgy cough too) and then immediately after, touched my bump 😱 I was nearly sick!

Pickanee · 11/09/2016 18:29

Zaphod-you're quite right-maybe as we feel so disgusting the Sharks could find us at least inedible!

PeachBellini123 · 11/09/2016 19:10

Love it Pinky

I do love this thread. I think everyone else thinks I should be glowing and feeling joyous at all times. But I'm finding it all a drag to be honest Blush

Original poster
DerekSprechenZeDick · 11/09/2016 19:14

Peach how far are you?

OP posts:
PeachBellini123 · 11/09/2016 19:20

Only 24 weeks! But have been terribly nauseous and suffered from back pain.

Theknittinggorilla · 11/09/2016 19:34

Hello fellow sufferers! 8 weeks with dc3 and now wondering what on earth we were thinking. Plus my 18 month old has turned into devil toddler literally the day we found out I was pregnant. The worst thing is that because i was so keen on dc3 and my husband was less convinced, if I so much as suggest that I feel like death, or am feeling slightly fed up by constant nausea and exhaustion, I get "well you wanted another one". Dh might not survive this pregnancy......

Yy to men feeling this symptoms (for at least a week so they understand the relentlessness of it). My dh was hungover today and I tried to explain that was the nearest thing to it but he looked dubious. Grrrrr.

isitseptemberyet · 11/09/2016 20:04

my boy pregnancies are fab (carrying one now) only have six weeks to go and know i'm going to feel sooo sad to be without my bump (this is no.5 dnt think OH will allow me another)!
Girl pregnancies are pretty wanky (three of them) i put over five stone on with each one, as the only thing that made me happy / feel normal was stuffing my face. I could barely walk comfortably by the end of them and everything hurt, heart burn was unbearable.
I would however like my OH to give birth to this one.. last one was 10lb , my poor poor fanny

oldgrandmama · 11/09/2016 20:07

Never tried shark. How does one cook it, OP?

EnquiringMingeWantsToKnow · 11/09/2016 20:09

You cook shark just like tuna steaks. Tastes OK but it's ethically dubious and chock full of mercury.