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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder (obsessively) why someone would un-tag herself from a fb photo?

140 replies

MerchantofVenice · 09/09/2016 19:49

Just that, really. I posted a completely unremarkable, cute pic of my ds. I tagged my friend, because we spent the day with her and her girls. The pic was only of my ds - but it's quite normal to tag the people you were on the outing with, surely?

I just don't get it. I'm sure I did tag her - but now there's no tag on the post. What are the reasons for doing this? Is she ashamed of being my friend? ? She's commented on the pic, saying what a nice time we had at the park. .. So why remove the tag? Is this a thing? Am I going mad?

OP posts:
Queenbean · 10/09/2016 08:53

Tagging someone in a status still puts the photo on their timeline

Tagging someone in a photo adds the picture to "pictures of me" album

For either one I wouldn't accept the tag - pic isn't of me, why do I want it on my timeline? I'd like and comment "had a great day too" but that's it

I have a friend who always takes a selfie and then posts "new hair and can't wait to see XYZ" and tags us all in. It's the same as this - I don't want a pic of someone that isn't me on my timeline and all the notifications pinging off all the time

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es · 10/09/2016 08:58

I get annoyed with FB asking who I was with, where I was etc and ignore those. I guess I just feel that if the other person wanted to post about what we did that day they would. I have occasionally tagged someone as you describe to get their attention or show them a photo of somewhere we've been together, they may want to see or copy the picture, but there's no way I would expect them to automatically accept/keep the tag. I very rarely post onto someone else's timeline either, Happy Birthday is generally the only reason. If I want to speak to them specifically I'll message them.

CrotchetQuaverMinim · 10/09/2016 09:04

It's not necessarily that weird to do it, but the point is that it's not at all weird of her to untag herself!! And no need for you to take it personally and get upset about it.

Occasionally I will tag people for things or post on their timelines. sometimes they delete them. fine.

Most of the arsiness here seems to be on your side.

StealthPolarBear · 10/09/2016 09:16

Agree with hearts trumps diamonds
if you think about old fashioned photo albums the "tags" would describe who was in tbe picture and where they were. Not " and great aunt molly in germany might like to see"

Ameliablue · 10/09/2016 10:27

Fb wants people to share lots of information but that doesn't make it sensible. For instance checking in to an airport or holiday destination and tagging friends you are meeting could potentially tell thousands of people that you are away from home.

AyeAmarok · 10/09/2016 10:56

I would untag myself in a post if other was attached to a photo that wasn't of me, absolutely.

Even moreso given you say she has DC and will occasionally post photos of them, because otherwise when people are looking through her "photos of [Jane]" then a picture of your DC will come up as one of her, and that's just weird. She probably doesn't want people to think your DC is her DC. Which is what people would assume.

There is a little bit of arrogance in your assumption that someone would want a photo of your DC tagged with them in it, when they aren't in the photo.

StrumpersPlunkett · 10/09/2016 11:09

I go through my profile page about once every 6 months and delete everything. I I tag myself from photos and comments in people's threads.
I like my fb footprint to be as small as possible.

PricklyHodgeheg · 10/09/2016 11:27

I expect she has a good reason.

I tagged someone in a similar post and it turned out she had turned someone else down in favour of meeting us.

Also I have some difficult family members on Facebook and I am careful about what they know about us, so I have untagged myself on several occasions.

StillDrSethHazlittMD · 10/09/2016 11:34

I have around 400 friends on FB, 250 of which I see quite regularly due to work and social connections being quite similar. I probably get tagged as in "was at X with Y" maybe six times a year. I think, OP, more people don't tag than do tag and that your group who do this a lot are actually a minority among FB users, but because you all do it, you assume everyone else does.

OliviaBensonOnAGoodDay · 10/09/2016 11:37

She probably thought you tagged it by accident. It didn't have her in it or even her kid!

USBstuck · 10/09/2016 11:37

It is very very rare that I "accept" a tag on Facebook. Why? Because I don't want to

This. I only check facebook once every few days, and if I get a notification that somebody has tagged me (my profile is set to need approval for all tags, etc.), i just ignore it.

Caffeinator · 10/09/2016 12:51

I would untag myself from a photo that didn't have me in it too.

Caffeinator · 10/09/2016 12:52

Oh and that includes posts I've been tagged in rather than the photo itself.

HelenaDove · 11/09/2016 18:32

Im on fb and twitter but much prefer twitter.

americaandhawaii · 11/09/2016 19:40

Bit late back as I made the comment days ago about the birthday messaging thing being annoying but I meant it was annoying for the person sending the message not for me!

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