DS not invited to wedding

[muminmanchester]

Let me start this off by saying that I am categorically NOT moaning about people having child free weddings. I had one myself and it was bloody great.

However, my cousin is getting married and hasn't invited DS. He'll be just under 1 when the wedding takes place. Fair enough - but she has invited my other cousin's three kids.

The wedding is at the other end of the country which means leaving DS for 2 nights - but everyone he knows will be at the wedding (DH's parents don't see much of him as they live miles away). I don't want to leave him with people he doesn't know for 2 nights.

Would it be unreasonable to ask if he can come? It's obvs not child free if my other cousin's kids are going. Otherwise probably either DH or myself will not go to the wedding so we can look after DS.

Thoughts?

Well it's not difficult...

Names on the invite, anyone omitted is not invited.

That was yr friends fuck up there for not stating they wanted your kids.

We told him we didn't think they were invited and he said no, that our invite included them. They had seats reserved as well.

Jeez I hope they weren't pissy given that they hadn't actually invited the kids...

But OP states that her DS isnt invited. So that's pretty clear. I'm sure the bride and groom will be happy to change things just for them though - it's not like they are causing any potential inconvenience, and the day is all about the OP and her family.

You seem to be taking this all rather personally livia... I also think that an explanation as to why you can't come is necessary, my cousin felt quite hurt by a few of her family members who didn't give a reason, she felt like they didn't care...

I agree with Goblin. I'm having a family children only wedding, as everyone I know seems to have at least 3 children and we just couldn't afford to invite them all! However 2 people have said they can't get babysitters (both only children) and I've told them to bring their DCs along. If I was really against it or they were pain in the arse or multiple kids, I would have given it the "I understand" response.

No not taking it personally, I have just seen this happen in RL and it sucks.

YABU

Either go or don't go , it they had wanted your DS there (as lovely as he may be) then they would have put him on the invite.

We only had selected children at our wedding and a couple of cousins were very unhappy. One didn't come (fair enough) and one came but sat there with a face like a slapped arse the whole time and left as soon as it was socially appropriate to do so. Neither speak to us any more.
They both tried to get their kids invited, we nearly said okay to the first one and then before we had got round to replying to the message the other one tried her luck. We reconsidered and realised we would probably be opening the floodgates so said no to both.

For someone else's point of view it might have looked like we were being mean but there was method in our choices. We only invited children that we knew as people in their own right , those that have a relationship with us independently of their parents .
Obviously other people wouldn't have known this.

I agree with Goblin. I'm having a family children only wedding, as everyone I know seems to have at least 3 children and we just couldn't afford to invite them all! However 2 people have said they can't get babysitters (both only children) and I've told them to bring their DCs along. If I was really against it or they were pain in the arse or multiple kids, I would have given it the "I understand" response.

Aren't the people who did get sitters going to be a bit when they arrive at the no kids other than family wedding and there are kids other than family there then?