We used a name to honour my FIL (but changed the spelling) so he is moaning that we might as well not have bothered. Should I change it?

[ConfusedAsEver]

I'm actually upset/annoyed. My FIL has an okay name (I don't love it, but we used my dad's name for DS1, so didn't mind using it) however both DH and I hate the way his dad's name is spelt, it's a 'unique' spelling.

So we used the original spelling. He is very annoyed claiming it's a completely different name and is giving DH a hard time about him preferring my dad and letting me walk all over him

Now I don't even want to use the blinking name!! WIBU to change the name? (Our son is registered btw)

Natalie Snorted tea on my laptop here!

Keep the original it is said the same FIL obviously doesnt want to be the only whilly in the family hence kicking off. His parents obviously had no clue how to spell when they received it on the birth certificate because some nurse had no clue worse still they spelled it that way

I've been on MN for 10 years and you are the least unreasonable I have ever seen anyone be!

We had that two. MIL spelt his name in a -stupid- unique way. Neither my XH nor I liked how he spelt it. To us it looked like a child learning to spell so we changed it and MIL. We also felt that it gave her her own identity while still honouring MIL without them being little MIL and big MIL. I really like her name so kept it. Now when MIL says DD's name is MIL, no not named after me!. We says no she's not! 😊

I know what you mean OP there are some really silly ways of spelling names But don't just carry on with some wanky spelling of FILs name as it will bug you forever. FIL may well get over his juvenile strop and love his GC so much he won't even notice!! If he becomes a famous person Ill bet he will run to "claim the name " iykwim!!

Literally.
Crying.
OMG. Whillyam

OP, do both your DSs share FILs surname?
Perhaps you should point that out to him if he feels offended.

Thank you iklboo. Now I have to read it a la Stewie

It looks like it was a variant in the 17th century:

www.british-history.ac.uk/vch/berks/vol4/pp285-294

"The bell frame is inscribed, 'The 4 churchwardens, Whillyam Godere, John Felde, Richard Dastene, John Brocke, Marthew Chancler Carpintir made this frame 1605.'"

Is your FIL from Berkshire? And was he a churchwarden in the 17th century? are his mates called Carpintir, etc?

Is he from Geordie desent (or similar)?

Whillyam seems to be a Surname in this country and some regions name their Son the Surname on the Maternal side eg Robson Green.

Tell him you won't bother then, and change the baby's name to something completely different. You can't subject your child to a lifetime of bring called Dickspam!

I'd choose another name that you really want got your child - he clearly isn't honoured anyway ( and sounds obnoxious actually)

Seriously - do t land a child with that awful spelling - imagine the teasing or worse coming his way. Life is tough enough.......

Don't (oops)

at Whillham!

Whillyam This has got to be a wind-up. Surely?!

Oh dear - sadly this situation was predictable at the point that you named your first son after your father. (Don't know if anyone else has already made this point, but heyho ...)

If, and I mean if he is an otherwise decent human being and this is a total one-off moment of demandingness (we can all be arseholes sometimes), I might be tempted to compromise. But it would be a compromise:

"FIL, I appreciate you are upset. We hadn't expected this and didn't intend to hurt your feelings. However, while we want to honour both grandfather's with our sons names, we are still the parents and ultimately the choice, and comfort with the choice is ours. These are the choices we would suggest given your current feelings 1) stick with our spelling of your name 2) we'll use your spelling but it will become a middle name and we will choose a new first name that we are comfortable with"

If it's not a complete one-off and he's generally a demanding dick, I think I'd just do whatever I wanted to at this point. Like change to a name that I actually wanted, in preference to William.

Crying here! Best thread I've read! I'd keep William and spell it properly. Can you tell FIL that you have kept the original spelling? Would he ever know you hadn't? My dad and PIL spell DS1s name differently every time they write it, he doesn't notice or care!

Will yam
W hill yam
Whilly am
W hill y am

Presumably he pronounces his name William but he's wrong, his name is any of the above but it's not Wil liam.

Tinklypoo

Welsh version would be Gwyllim

I'd be tempted to go down in flames and rename the boy after your Dad instead. If he's raging about it anyway, may as well give him something to rage about. I wouldn't really but it'd be tempting

Maudlin Spelling wasn't standardised in the 17th century - people spelled words and especially, names, as they wanted.

Oh realised your first ds has your father's name so maybe don't rename this one after him too.