Taking my boy in the ladies toilet...

[40andfucked]

So we were in a busy sports pub full of very happy (several drunk) people after a great win. My son needed the loo so I took him to the ladies with me. I was told by a very stroppy barmaid who happened to be in there that she wanted him out.
I said I didn't feel comfortable him going to the men's, she said well he's not coming in here. I said I don't want him in the men's alone. She said 'well go in there with him then'! So u did!
He's 10. Normally I'd send him in the men's, but not in a pub full of drunk strangers. I know some may think I've very over protective, but it really wouldn't have hurt her to just let him go for a quick were!!

40andfucked Why couldn't your husband or brother take him to the mens' to shield him from the pissed up, narcotics fuelled, penis-waving paedophiles?

Yes op one of the two men you were with should have took him in there. Would have saved the agro

@Ninasimoneinthemorning
A pub full of drunk men? Eh? Are all "drunk men" potential rapists or attackers?Charming way to think.

Having said that, I recall taking a friend's 2 children out a few years ago (boy of 10 and his older sister), boy wanted to go to toilet in a pub (we were at Chinese New Year celebrations in London), it was the Dutch pub, I asked him if he'd be ok going there in a cubicle and said I'd wait outside. he was fine with that.

Either the place was full of scary potential abductors (in which case he shouldn't have come into the pub) or it wasn't (in which case he could have managed the toilet all on his own).

Obviously neither of those situations justify wanting to use the disabled toilet. They are for disabled people, just in case you weren't aware, not for special snowflakes.

@40andfucked
Don't think GF means girlfriend...

sirzy - well yes. But some people don't want to risk it and that's not unnatural. It does happen.

You only have to do a quick Google and it will give you a list of children that have been attacked in public toilets or areas. Will it happen every time a child goes in, no. But it's up to each parent to do what they feel is right for that moment and situation.

livia that's really black and white thinking. It doesn't work like that.

Any reason the mother can't stand outside the toilets and only go in if needed?

And it may be black and white thinking but it's true

delicate I never said that. But feel free to twist my words if it pleases.

nina is every man dangerous?

So at what age does a parent have to stop babying because of their irrational fears? Should they accompany the child at 12? 14? 16? 18?

Or should they be realistic, accept that the risk is tiny and encourage independence and sensible risk assessment? Fair enough stand outside the door the first few times before sending them off alone but you do a child no favours to make them think even a trip to the toilet is dangerous.

But i've proven my point.

No, you haven't. I got them right and I RL never have a problem telling boys from girls, they move differently to start with. Or men from women.

So why couldn't one of the men have taken him to the gents in the first place?

I think sirzy You've discovered the hole in the trolls story.

No it's not true. It takes just one (or two in the case of the Debenhams rape) to be in a position where an opportunity comes up.

Men attack women random daily. Yet when it comes to children some posters have a real issue to believe that opportunist assaults happen. Do you think when a women gets assaulted on her way home from some where the place she just was was full or rapey men? No it just takes one.

I RL never have a problem telling boys from girls, they move differently to start with.

Wait....Are you saying biologists are wrong?

OF course they don't move differently!

Nobody has denied opportunist attacks happen. What people have said though is you have to be realistic about that risk and you can't live your life expecting to be attacked on every corner, and you can't raise children to believe they can't even go for a wee.

Can honestly say I have never goaded anyone in my life.

Goady fucker! Charming!

Men attack women random daily.

And that is why we need female=only spaces.

Female. ONLY.

I have worked in pubs and we used to have to stop people using the toilet if they weren't actually buying anything. Same here, in every pub I have worked in

However, if the boss wasn't around we all always let kids go if they needed it. Tbh I personally let everyone go if they needed it as I would hate to be refused access to a loo if I felt desperate. but I did know deep down I could be fired for doing so and that I was breaking 'rules'

Re. Stranger Things I knew El was a girl as soon as she came on screen. I'm surprised others didn't.

I didn't because my bosses have been twats and if I had been caught they would have sacked me. Not worth losing a job over.

He needed a wee, I needed a wee! I genuinely didn't see the issue.

Yes women need space from men! MEN! My 10 year old is very far from a man!!!!