Taking my boy in the ladies toilet...

[40andfucked]

So we were in a busy sports pub full of very happy (several drunk) people after a great win. My son needed the loo so I took him to the ladies with me. I was told by a very stroppy barmaid who happened to be in there that she wanted him out.
I said I didn't feel comfortable him going to the men's, she said well he's not coming in here. I said I don't want him in the men's alone. She said 'well go in there with him then'! So u did!
He's 10. Normally I'd send him in the men's, but not in a pub full of drunk strangers. I know some may think I've very over protective, but it really wouldn't have hurt her to just let him go for a quick were!!

But no, I'm not saying all five year olds can go on their own, just that mine does without imploding or melting. Oh and he likely has asd like me.

So no, there is no excuse for an NT ten year old to be in the ladies.

Sorry, posted too soon

Although this is probably academic as nobody's bothered by five year olds; it's the older boys we're discussing here.

But a 5 year old can look 7, a 7 year old can look 10, a 10 year old can look 6.

A perfectly innocent situation could make someone uncomfortable

That's not a reason for allowing older children to use the wrong toilet baby. If there is an older looking seven year old in the ladies and anyone queries it, if the cut off is eight (just for example) no one can reasonably have a problem with it.

I'd say 7/8 is a sensible cut off as usually by that age children are fully independent in the toilet and old enough to get embarrassed about being in the wrong toilets.

If your actions are making a woman or girl feel uncomfortable then it is your problem. At least accept some responsibility

Responsibility for what? For making a poor little princess feel uncomfortable because I was making sure my 5 year old child is safe whilst I/he/we have a piss?
Sorry, couldn't care less if a woman or girl feels uncomfortable about that.

"Responsibility for what? For making a poor little princess feel uncomfortable because I was making sure my 5 year old child is safe whilst I/he/we have a piss? "

This thread is not about 5 year olds. HTH.

What a horrible post!

No way is the op going to answer or even acknowledge your question Livia they're having way too much fun now that this thread has gone the way they wanted.

Not you Bertrand

FFS. How many times? We are talking about ten year olds, not five year olds. Can you point me to ANY post that says five year old boys should not be allowed to accompany their mum into the ladies?

Most people would say that 5 year olds should be supervised in loos. The OP has a NT 10 year old which is completely different.

Sorry, couldn't care less if a woman or girl feels uncomfortable about that.

And you are the mother to boys - I presume you will be teaching them that attitude?

But a 5 year old can look 7, a 7 year old can look 10, a 10 year old can look 6

My 5 year old looks more like a 7 year old. But also has the mind and maturity of a 5 year old. When he is 7 he will probably look about 9 at the rate he's growing.

Yes purple I know we did say that up thread too.

I just mean it's not black and white. You could unintentionally upset someone and on the other hand an older boy could sneak in and so on.

The op won't answer that Livia they're having too much fun

Under normal circumstances I wouldn't

I just mean it's not black and white. You could unintentionally upset someone and on the other hand an older boy could sneak in and so on.

People would find it upsetting to be asked how old their child it? That's a new one on me...

My 4 year old can get onto a loo seat by herself at home and out and about. She doesn't need a step. She's not exactly tall for her age either.

My last comment was to 3littleboys

Someone did say 5, actually said when they start school.

Point being we all have slightly different cut off points that we think appropriate.

Mine in 8 and I feel in certain circumstances it's ok for him to come in with me. He definitely won't be when he 14 though.

My four year old can get on the raised seat, little, there isn't a child in DS1s class that is littler than him

It's just a load of excuses from entitled (bingo!) helicopter parents

No purple what I mean is a 6 year old who looks older might upset a female even though it's all entirely innocent.

Not everyone is going to question the child's age but according to this thread girls are scared and uncomfortable with boys in the loo. So an older looking boy could upset a girl by that logic.

No I won't be teaching them "that attitude". We will go and do what we need to do and be on our way. But if someone approaches me and tells me they don't want my son in the toilets because he's making them feel uncomfortable, they will witness me telling them that that's their problem and not ours.

And when your sons grow up having learnt that women's discomfort is something to be dismissed?