Taking my boy in the ladies toilet...

[40andfucked]

So we were in a busy sports pub full of very happy (several drunk) people after a great win. My son needed the loo so I took him to the ladies with me. I was told by a very stroppy barmaid who happened to be in there that she wanted him out.
I said I didn't feel comfortable him going to the men's, she said well he's not coming in here. I said I don't want him in the men's alone. She said 'well go in there with him then'! So u did!
He's 10. Normally I'd send him in the men's, but not in a pub full of drunk strangers. I know some may think I've very over protective, but it really wouldn't have hurt her to just let him go for a quick were!!

So you're an Ofsted registered childminder?

I did state 'obviously not in the same circumstances'.

If you take your own child to a place with all those drunk, high, rapists, god knows what you'd do with other people's kids.

She'd evidently misuse the disabled facilities anyway.

So you think a childminder who waits outside the gents for her 10yeaf old charge to come back out would be suspended in the vanishingly unlikely event that some sort of harm came to him. Even though I'd guess the vast majority of boys of the same age would go alone and presumably the parents had agreed that's what would happen if they were out and needed the loo.

Okay...

This has been entertaining

If I had a childminder who took my 10 year old into a pub full of pissed people, the toilet chosen would be the least of my worries.

Can we have a dickhead emoticon

This thread should be in the gents because it's a load of big hairy bullocks

If you were childminding my 10yr old I would expect him to tell you that he was used to going to the gents and just go!
At 10 they can't go into the ladies without a woman - that should tell you something.

And my sons think I was overprotective- they have no idea!

(I had no idea that you had to tell childminders that you wanted your 10 yr old to be given his usual independence)

Yabu.

OP my DS is 4, so not sure how I'd feel when he's 10 but think YANBU.
As a mother you have made the decision for what's best for your son and right in your situation.
For some posters it takes a lot of courage to post and ask for advice on here. And I feel so saddened the way some people have responded on here it's like they are looking for a reason to put someone down. A little respect and constructive comments would not go a miss!

I would of course have a cause for complaint if the childminder took my child into totally inappropriate places!

Well obviously I wouldn't take minded children to the pub. It was a one off. I was watching a game with my family, who i haven't seen since Christmas, the kids went to the park with my (almost 18 year old) daughter.

As the game was finishing they came back to the pub, which allows children till 7pm (it was 5pm) as my son needed the toilet.

amiss. Sorry.

Someone has to stand up for the poor child LetMeBe - total embarrassment if they were seen by friends.

Thank you for saying my post is 'big hairy bollocks' as it shows me how SOME of the people on here are extremely immature and not people I would wish to converse with in the future.

YABU Ten is FAR too old!
you see adults as a threat to your DD, but equally people might see your DS as a threat to their little girls going into the toilets alone..

PMSL

I bet PaulDacresMicroPenis is devastated that Childminder of the Year won't be conversing with her in future.

I am a little shocked by this. My 9 year old DS always comes into the ladies with me and his older sister. There is no way I would let him use the gents on his own. No one has ever batted an eyelid. I didn't ever think anyone would see this as a problem. Wow.

I'm divorced and my kids spent nearly half their time with their dad which probably explains my bafflement at the idea that any non disabled 10 year old needs accompanying to the loo and that toilets are scary places. Even when my son was with his dad his dad didn't accompany him to the toilet age 10 and he sent my daughter off unaccompanied to the ladies. Age 5 is different but teaching your son that all men are potential rapists and men's toilets are scary places even with mummy waiting outside seems bonkers

Satan. I don't think a 15 year old shouldn't be in the ladies. Why can't you wait outside the disabled loo whilst he goes and then he waits outside whilst you go?

I have a teenager with SN.

He would much prefer to use the men's toilets or the disabled toilet and wait outside while I use the ladies.

It would be quicker to let him use the ladies but I respect him and I respect women's spaces.

I am actually shocked by some of the responses I have had on here this evening. I've never claimed to be childminder of the year, nor mother of the year. But I do my absolute best for my children and the children in my care and I won't apologise for that.