14 years working in a dept and not even a cheap bunch of flowers

[tupperwareAARGGH]

Massively outing myself here but....

I have just left a department that I worked in for 14 years and wasn't even given a cheap bunch of flowers. 14 years!!!

I've contributed to many peoples leaving presents and I didn't even get a card from the department either. I did get a card from the team I worked with last night but nothing from the whole department.

Its made me feel very sad and upset when I know I shouldn't let it get to me and YES, YES I know I should never expect people to buy me something but nothing, nothing after such a long time.

I'm being unreasonable to be upset by this aren't I??

[tupperwareAARGGH]

No people who have left to only work on the bank have had pressies and cards before. I'm completely leaving and will not be doing any bank there but I was asked if I would.

[carabos]

Horrible. Here's some from me and I don't even know you.

[tupperwareAARGGH]

Thank you

[LaContessaDiPlump]

op.

I remember when I left my first 'proper' job, after 6 years; I had to arrange my own leaving lunch at the student union as no-one else seemed too bothered. I wouldn't have minded except that our boss had organised an elaborate, all-department leaving party for our postdoc when she'd left several months earlier. That hurt somewhat.

Hopefully they will twig later that no-one got you anything and someone, somewhere will be horrified at the oversight.

At least you don't have to work with these twats anymore, now that you know what they're like!! Do NOT go back for extra shifts either.

[AntiHop]

If it's the norm for everyone to be given a leaving gift that it sounds really odd that you weren't. Surely if you were that unpopular you would have realised? Is it some big mix up? Is there someone yoy are friendly with that you can ask?

Even if it was a mix up rather than deliberate, it's shirty behaviour.

[AntiHop]

*shitty

[ThumbWitchesAbroad]

That really sucks. I'm so sorry that you've had such a rotten bunch of colleagues! At least you know you'll be moving on to hopefully nicer ones. from me too - and here's some for later!

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

Very thoughtless and unkind of them, Tupperware. It shouldn't make us feel as though it's some sort of indictment on us as people but... it does. Particularly when we've worked there a long time.

Workplaces should be sorted out by management and the 'policy' agreed. Either do it for none or do it for all of them. At least that hurts a bit less if you're not singled out.

for you.

[FishTailPlait]

Some for you to celebrate leaving a bunch of ungrateful people. Good luck with your new job!
I have to confess though that we had a collection for 2 colleagues who were getting married & moving offices at the same time. We found the collection money a few months later in a desk that hadn't been used We did get them some lovely first married Christmas gifts instead!

[minky21]

Same happened to me. I worked in a unit for 12 years and when I left I got nothing too. Same as you op I contributed over those years to many a leaving present for other staff as well as baby presents etc. I didn't expect a present (as I got absolutely nothing when my two children arrived) but must admit that I was hurt that I didn't even warrant a card! I was told that I was a great team member and always had good appraisals too and was well liked! Ah well four years later and I am much happier (but they still didn't even get me a card, the bastards!) and I'm not bitter at all

[chough]

tupperware, I wouldn't worry about outing yourself: it would be a good thing for people to know how hurt you are.
Your colleagues have been thoughtless, or at least haven't got round to organising something.
YANBU at all. Hope you can just put these people behind you and move on.

[Wibblywobblyfoo]

I had the exact same thing. Left work at the same time as 3 other members of staff. I'd been there longer than all 3. I got a card. Signed by about 4 people. They openly admitted that they had forgotten I was leaving. Gits.

[tupperwareAARGGH]

antihop I'm not sure I'd have the balls to ask but when someone asked if I was having a champagne breakfast I said no and that I didn't even get a card and that was on the dreaded Facebook. I expect it will get back to them. Its normal for you to go out to breakfast after a night shift if you are leaving too.

A colleague that used to work there came down during the night to say goodbye and mentioned the breakfast thing and I said nothing had been mentioned or organised. She took me for breakfast and did ask the others if they wanted to come and they all said no. I honestly thought all the hugs, kisses and we are going to miss you were genuine but clearly not.

I just burst into tears when I walked into my mums house to pick my DS up. I feel like an idiot for being so upset by it.

[ScarlettSahara]

Oh OP - what a thoughtless lot. I would be mystified too. Have some , .
What did your colleagues say when you left?

[tupperwareAARGGH]

scarlet that they were going to miss me blah blah blah.

[user1470997562]

That is rubbish. Are you sure they knew which day you were leaving? Sometimes if you work shifts people aren't really aware.

I've had a lot of jobs though and it's very variable. It very often depends on the department having one person who organises these things. If that person is missing, it no longer happens. A bit like secret santa. I really wouldn't take it personally.

The job I had for a year and felt completely unappreciated and disliked - they bought me a pile of presents when I left. The hospital ward I worked on for 5 years, where I had several colleagues I considered friends and got on with everybody, zilch.

Look forward to your new life.

[dancinghulagirl]

bunch of arseholes

[Cackleberry4]

My line manager asked me if it was this week or next that I was leaving. He was a Grade A twat.

My thoughts are with you.

[ScarlettSahara]

Oh don't beat yourself for feeling upset. I am sure most people would be too.I wouldn't read anything into it. I guess it's holiday season etc etc.

It's a similar feeling to how upset I felt when one of my friends forgot my birthday but organised something special for another of her friends- ( not a big birthday) and yes it hurts.

I think you should treat yourself or go out with somebody close from work or some friends.

[Benedikte2]

Maybe everyone thought someone else was going to organise something?
Very often it's the same people who do that sort of thing, unless it's a personal friend. Maybe that someone was on holiday?
So sorry Tupper, you clearly deserved better!
Good luck in your new job

[jellycat1]

Unbelievable.

[JellyWitch]

It depends who has to organise it I guess. Someone recently left our team the day after their line manager - who had failed to organise anything, as was her responsibility. It appalling and embarrassing but we will have a leaving card next week when people are back from leave and it can be organised retrospectively.

I feel for you though - it's shitty.

[HappyAxolotl]

What a shame. Similar thing happened to a friend recently. He left a role where he knew and worked with everyone in the office, had been there a good few years and certainly seemed to be well-liked. I bought a card and let it be known there was a kitty at my desk. The card went missing on the rounds of the office and no-one put a bean in the kitty.

A couple of people did take pity and organised a cake, the department he was closest to had their own gift collection, but as for the other 200...

On the bright side, my mate doesn't regret leaving!

[tupperwareAARGGH]

It really is more common than I thought.

[Albatross26]

Sad how cliquey some workplaces can be. A woman who joined about a month ago got cards, gifts the works for her 30th, yet another who's been there years got nothing for her 40th and was really upset. I'm not holding out much hope for when I leave! Bugger them OP, treat yourself to something you want and forget them :)