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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think going to the loo in front of your dh is disgusting!?

269 replies

Piniatapearl · 22/08/2016 22:54

This just came up in conversation with my sister. She thinks it's perfectly normal that her and her dh will have a shit in front of each other whilst the other is showering or brushing their teeth or whatever.

I just think it's really unnecessary! I do have poo issues so is it me being weird or her?

I'm definitely not the poo troll by the way

OP posts:

KittyKrap · 23/08/2016 21:13

Wee yes, poo no.

Snap. Although I'll only pee if I've been drinking...a lot! I did have an issue with him having a poo. It was in the ensuite and I could see the reflection of him wiping his arse on the shiny wardrobe doors

LuisSuarezTeeth · 23/08/2016 21:18

Of course it's not disgusting. It's needs must if you only have one bathroom, personal choice if you have more than one.

Truckingalong · 23/08/2016 21:29

Ive poo'd infront of the dog. She doesn't seem too put out by it.

user7755 · 23/08/2016 21:32

Never peed pooed or farted in front of DH. Barring illness / disability / care needs, I can't imagine a time when I would.

Fanjolena · 23/08/2016 22:58

My DP has seen EVERYTHING and he's still here. He's a keeper.

blackheartsgirl · 23/08/2016 23:26

I've never pooed in front of dp. Not once in 11 years. Wees yes, farts oh god yes.

Serenitymummy · 23/08/2016 23:30

I can't really be arsed about enforcing privacy with that, dh will sometimes shut the door when he goes to poo (separate bathroom and toilet) but not always. And if he shuts it it's never locked so sometimes I'll go open it and chat, like if I'm making a shopping list and want his input. I never shut the door (only when we and ds in the house of course!) so we'll chat if either of them walks by. Only thing I draw the line with is tampon removal/insertion, the way I have to contort myself to get those fuckers in right I don't want him to see!!!!

YourNewspaperIsShit · 23/08/2016 23:40

My DP has IBS so there's nothing he can do and I just have fuck all shame Then again my DM and Dsis both watch me give birth vaginally twice and shit myself both times so my dignity isn't something I've retained

theluckiest · 23/08/2016 23:53

I was flat on my back when giving birth (DS had clip on his head so I couldn't move). Had the urge to push so I did - twas a poo & most disappointing as I thought it was a baby.

Midwife handed me a bogroll & I just glared at her. I couldn't see past my enormous bump, was lying prone in agony. I could no more wipe my own arse than fly to the moon.

DH sighed deeply & took the bogroll to give me a wipe. That, readers, is why I married him.

He also has had terrible haemorrhoids & I have had to insert the medication for him. We couldn't possibly marry anyone else now - we've both seen too much.

There are no bum or poo secrets in my house.

avamiah · 24/08/2016 00:09

theluckiest,
Your post made me smile,thanks for sharing and yes you are lucky, he sounds a good one .
On a lighter note, glad you got your own back with the (H) medication.

DrFoxtrot · 24/08/2016 00:17

I didn't used to have an issue with weeing/ pooing in front of XH, interestingly I only became more shy when the intimacy had gone. It got to the stage where I couldn't poo in the en suite knowing he might hear noises in the bedroom. That's when I knew my marriage was over - not really, the kissing went way before then .

HornyTortoise · 24/08/2016 00:22

Totally offtopic but how the hell did the midwife expect you to wipe yourself?! I shat during the pushing stage, midwife swiftly removed it herself and no fuss was made at all. Even by DH who I assumed would really rub my face in it (not literally) if I shat during it all..I was actually a bit worried about him making a fuss once my midwife told me it was so common.... He has never to this day mentioned it.

MotherOfROC · 24/08/2016 00:25

Oh dear is it wrong that I go to my parents house and leave the door open whilst having a poo whilst her spaniel just lays at my feet 😆

avamiah · 24/08/2016 00:27

HT,
I had a bitch of a midwife that I will never forget my awful experience.

Seren85 · 24/08/2016 00:58

Wee, yes. Eg one in shower or bath and other really needs to go or in a time sensitive situation whilst the other is brushing teeth. Poo, its been known but only in emergencies. Although as mentioned by a PP, I have always and still do go and sit on the loo and chat to my Mum if she's having a bath!

TheCrowFromBelow · 24/08/2016 01:46

Seeing me give birth and have a poo was unavoidable double bill event for DP. He got front row seats to the whole show again with DS2

Ifeelyourpain2 · 24/08/2016 07:55

We don't use the toilet in front of each other, and I would like to keep it that way! No farting either (except accidents!). My husband saw me give birth too and I lost dignity there, but I'd like to think some of it has returned!

Crazypetlady · 24/08/2016 08:14

I wee in front of my d.p to be honest I will wee in front of female family members if we both need to use the bathroom , it isnt a big deal to my extended and immediate family at all.

MrsMook · 24/08/2016 09:55

I have IBS so DH doesn't tend to hang around when I've gone off to the loo for a while. Not until the windows have been open for 10 minutes.

One of my clearest memories of the first birth was giving a push and shouting "have I pooed? It stinks!" The MW sent me to the toilet too. A pretty pointless move given that I could barely reach to wipe between a humongous bump and SPD before the effects of about 30 hours of labour kicked in. I probably blocked the loo with paper towels as toilet roll was not cutting it!

So DH seeing me on the loo? Meh.

HermioneJeanGranger · 24/08/2016 10:07

I'm not embarassed to pee/poo infront of OH if necessary, but I have no idea why you'd want to sit in the same room as someone shitting unless there was really no other option!

scarednoob · 24/08/2016 10:11

i'm in the disgusting camp, for both. never done it, never would, if I have any choice in the matter. DP can't even bear farts, he gets really fed up if I let one slip (which I didn't ever do at first, but now we have DD, fuck it).

however, I have a friend who swears you're only in a real relationship when you can poo in front of each other, so each to their own.

LuciaInFurs · 24/08/2016 10:13

DH and I don't even bother to shut the bathroom door. I regularly walk in whilst he's pooing for a chat and vice versa.

When we were dating I woke up one morning and stood up and in seconds bled through my clothes and soaked the floor (I was on my period, I have awful periods). The flat was a rental and the carpet was cream so I legged it to the bathroom to avoid any more damage. I came back and DH had cleaned it all up. Neither of us are particularly bothered by bodily fluids etc.

headinhands · 24/08/2016 10:32

My husband saw me give birth too and I lost dignity there,

I feel sad that you feel that way about birth in front of your dp. Do you feel I should be ashamed for giving birth in front of my DH and that I should somehow apologise and make amends for letting myself down?

headinhands · 24/08/2016 10:33

hat's when I knew my marriage was over

Haha

RubbleBubble00 · 24/08/2016 10:34

Wee yes, poo noooooooo

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