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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think going to the loo in front of your dh is disgusting!?

269 replies

Piniatapearl · 22/08/2016 22:54

This just came up in conversation with my sister. She thinks it's perfectly normal that her and her dh will have a shit in front of each other whilst the other is showering or brushing their teeth or whatever.

I just think it's really unnecessary! I do have poo issues so is it me being weird or her?

I'm definitely not the poo troll by the way Confused

OP posts:
Lovingit81 · 24/08/2016 20:09

For the love of good if you can have sex,cry, be sick and give birth to your children in front of your hubby you can have a little poo. I honestly think relationships that can't stand the poo test are never going to last. Soz

donajimena · 24/08/2016 20:38

I'm firmly in the no camp. For everything.
I could wee if I had no choice. I'm aghast at how many of you do tbh but each to their own.

TheInternetIsForPorn · 24/08/2016 20:39

For me it's s no no. But each to their own.

BummyMummy77 · 24/08/2016 20:44

Dh fished my little turds out of the birthing pool (with our wine sediment sieve which I was rather annoyed about). Didn't bother him, doesn't bother me.

ElleBellyBeeblebrox · 24/08/2016 20:52

Hehehe wine sediment sieve. Is it still in use as such?

AppleSetsSail · 24/08/2016 21:00

For the love of good if you can have sex,cry, be sick and give birth to your children in front of your hubby you can have a little poo. I honestly think relationships that can't stand the poo test are never going to last. Soz

Right-o. Wink

Out of curiosity, how long have you been married?

Dilligaf81 · 24/08/2016 21:03

I pushed out a 10 lb baby and a poo at the same time in front of my hubby. Really don't think sitting on the toilet why he is in the shower is going affect how he see me.

BuggersMuddle · 24/08/2016 22:07

I am firmly with blueamberuk in principle.

We both have IBD and are lucky enough to be able to afford a house with two bathrooms now, as tbh, we really need that. I appreciate if we were poorer we might still need that and not have it (experienced that in our flats and on holiday).

In our house, peeing in front of each other is fine. We try to avoid pooing, but we both recognise that we have bowel conditions so shit literally happens. Ironically we've both seen seriously gross poo / vomit due to illness but unrelated to our conditions - we were doing up one bathroom and we both caught noro....

Shit as they say happens. But as a rule - taking a piss is fine whatever, taking a shit is private as far as possible.

Tapandgo · 24/08/2016 22:09

Gross and unnecessary. Learned toilet control and etiquette as a child and can't see any advantage or necessity to having an audience while emptying my bowel or bladder.

SpookyPotato · 24/08/2016 22:27

I don't shit in front of my partner so we must be heading for a break-up according to some posters... I've heard it all now! Grin You can be close to someone without smelling the inside of their bowels.

Pooing in childbirth or due to illness is totally different to laying a stinking pile in front of each other every day. There's just no need..

Notmuchtosay1 · 24/08/2016 22:35

Ha ha. It's quite funny reading everyone's views. I wouldn't poo with anyone listening. I like to put the taps on too if anyone is nearby. I wouldn't wee in front of anyone, partner nor children. I wouldn't fart in front of him either. Though I should really as I get a very blown up and painful tummy a lot. I just have to go outside. He wouldn't wee or fart either. I need to leave the house when he poos, which seems to be 3 times a day at least!

ellamoromou · 24/08/2016 22:51

Good Lord absolutely not and I'm no prude

Trump yes, actually sit having a poo - utterly vile and 'common', boh Shock

TheDowagerCuntess · 25/08/2016 00:33

This 'one loo in the house, so needs must' just doesn't apply.* We lived with one loo for years, and still left each in peace to have a shit.

*Obviously excluding people who have a lack of control over their bowels (I had no idea there were so many!).

TheDowagerCuntess · 25/08/2016 00:48

The weeing in the shower thread was quite a revelation. It seems that people actually teach their kids to wee in the shower, so of course you're going to think it's normal, if that's how you're raised.

If you've been raised to have a dump in private, then you'll always think of it as a private, audience-free activity.

BocaDeTrucha · 25/08/2016 01:06

Pee, yes but not for pooing. Ironically he's seen me shit myself whilst I gave birth and put the microlax suppositories in for me post-childbirth, but on an everyday basis, I don't want him anywhere near me nor do I want to see/hear/smell him pooing.

BummyMummy77 · 25/08/2016 01:42

Ellebelly- it got beaches and put through the dishwasher a few times but yes. Blush

BummyMummy77 · 25/08/2016 01:42

Bleached not beaches ffs

BummyMummy77 · 25/08/2016 01:44

Ds now sits outside the door when I'm pooing asking if it's a comfy poo or a mean poo. All poo mystique in our house is long gone.

BummyMummy77 · 25/08/2016 01:54

Saying that, my poops rarely smell, dh's smell like the pits of hell and even getting a tiny whiff makes me want to divorce him.

LucyintheskywithRainbows · 25/08/2016 02:01

Absolutely no way. Thankfully we have 3 toilets so there's plenty of options. I'm a very shy toilet person. Can't even wee if others are in earshot. We have a child but DH was up the top end holding my hand and being amazing. He's seen me being sick but no wee/poo/farts etc. Just over 11 years together Smile

LucyintheskywithRainbows · 25/08/2016 02:05

Btw just for those saying they put the taps on.... That doesn't stop them hearing. The noise is with you, not them. I remember my first poo after having ds. I was very nervous with having stitches etc. So I ran a bath (to try and mask the sound) but DH heard everything as the noise of the bath running wasn't loud to him in our bedroom. You need to get the other half to listen to music/watch TV etc xx

LucyintheskywithRainbows · 25/08/2016 02:08

Google poo pourri. Awesome product! Swear by it Smile

worrierandwine · 25/08/2016 03:07

Each to their own but if I was in the sort of relationship where I couldn't fart in front of husband I would go insane! Going to the toilet is a normal bodily function (like sneezing) and to pretend you don't do it is ridiculous. My DH often comes and sits on the toilet while I'm in the bath, he enjoys just sitting there Hmm I like to get in and get out when I need a no.2 so generally don't have any sort of audience but if he was in the shower/ bath and I needed to go then I would. We only have one bathroom though so if I had the option I would use another. You can have sex and see each other's most intimate areas and transfer bodily fluids but you can't go to the toilet in front of each other??
I guess it wouldn't pay for us all to be the same.

TheDowagerCuntess · 25/08/2016 04:38

Sex is nice. Taking a dump - not so much.

BroomhildaVonShaft · 25/08/2016 04:48

There's a vast difference between pretending you don't shit and not shitting in front of someone else.
Childbirth is a rare and special occasion and something amazing to treasure between a couple. Shitting is a daily, mundane and disgusting occurrence and there is no reason to share it so why compare? Likewise sex is fun and best when shared with someone you like, shitting is neither.