Or is DP over 'mates rates' for decorating?

[GillBear]

Moving into a house that needs a fair bit of work in a weeks time and also expecting a baby in 2 weeks.

I would normally do the decorating myself but think I'll be out of action for a while!

DP's brother is a painter & decorator. He lives up north and work is pretty thin on the ground so he struggles.

We live in the south west and have had him and his assistant down to help us paint in the past. He stays with us (we feed him) and charges £130 a day not including materials for himself, then that again for his assistant.

He's said he can come down and help with the new house but he wants more money as the week would include a Sunday and bank holiday, so £300 a day for the two of them not including materials. We'd also pay for their diesel.

DP says it's fair enough, even though they only charge £80 a day each up North. He says his brothers doing us a favour, but I think it works both ways as we're giving him work he desperately needs. DP says this is a horrible attitude and I'm taking advantage of his brother by not paying what he asks for.

Am I being a hormonal cowbag?

Have you actually got local quotes? And does it need to be done over the bank holiday weekend? (am guessing you'll have difficulty finding another tradesperson then.). The brother IMO can charge what he likes, it's his business. But now he's made his offer it's up to you to work out if there's a better option. IMO you would be unreasonable to try to get the brother to knock down his rates just because. You would not be unreasonable to find someone locally doing it cheaper and use them (or to say to the brother that if he would like to match that price he is still welcome to the job). But it has to be like for like - ie don't expect the brother to work the bank holiday weekend for the same cost as a local decorator charges for a weekday.

Wait until baby is older, get someone local in to do the work, whilst you & baby have a week away somewhere.

As for your 'D' P - LTB.

Maybe he will actually give his brother less money & pocket the rest.

'It's not really our business to judge OP's set up with her DP. They're not married and she owns the house, so if they both feel that this financial set up makes the arrangements clear then I think it's fair enough!'

Welcome to AIBU. Been here long?

This guy is mugging your off, OP.

My BIL is a decorator too and not cheap, that is why we don't use him, I expect to get a discount as I help his family out in other ways. Agree with fruit cider and expatinScotland. Make sure your assests are protected. Can't believe you are paying your DP for doing work in a house he is living in and you are having his child!

Also I'm not an expert but I would have thought that op is protecting the value of her home by paying her dp for working on it. There have been cases where a partner not on the mortgage/deeds has got a claim to a share of the value of home because they did improvement works on it. Op won't be in danger of that happening with her dp since he has already been compensated for the works.

Price up how much it would cost to use a local builder. Remember,myou won't be housing or feeding them.

Then see if your bil is asking a reasonable rate.

'There have been cases where a partner not on the mortgage/deeds has got a claim to a share of the value of home because they did improvement works on it. Op won't be in danger of that happening with her dp since he has already been compensated for the works.'

Yes she will be if he can prove he paid towards the mortgage.

He's putting his half brother's interests ahead of yours OP.

If it was his money being handed over, he might think differently.

This is all kinds of wrong.

Yes assets completely protected!

So for (massively generalised!) example - If I were to buy a run down house for 100k, get DP to do it up and sell it for £150k I would have made £50k.

DP would have made nothing and actually lost money as wouldn't have been working whilst working on my house.

doesn't sound right to me

get some local quotes. then decide.

you shouldn't be doing him a favour by giving him work/paying him over the odds and vice versa. if he is a good painter at a good rate and ok to live away for the work then fine, but you are not in a position to pay him over the odds because he needs the money! you're about to have a baby!

ps £200/day per painter in SW London, but that is London prices and decorators etc in high demand.

I can completely understand OP paying her DP to do work as I've suggested doing the same. If anyone else wants something doing he's there like a shot. I, meanwhile, have to wait months even for things that will benefit him too (like a working front door!!!).

The best way I've found is to start doing it myself as however competent I am it will never be up to his high, perfect standard so he'll take over!

Wow! OP you wouldn't be paying 'mate's rates' you'd be payin 'mug rates' if you went along with this!

He wants to charge you £300 a day & food, board and diesel? He (and your DP) are taking the P.

His 'assistant' (why does he need an assistant?) and he get £160 between them usually. Do clients usually pay for diesel for them to get to the job & food on top?

They are not doing you a favour. Does your DP see this as a chance for a few days with his DB (and his assistant mate?) It's not your job to pay over the odds because his business isn't doing well.

As for paying for an' assistant' Unless you live in a massive house with high ceilings, huge open spaces - any decorator worth his salt can decorate / wallpaper ceilings on their own.

Get some quotes from local decorators OP & don't fund this bank hol. meet up. Tell your DP you're no mug.

He is taking the p!

I had my living room completely redecorated, woodwork, walls and ceiling,, I only bought the paper for one wall, paint for everything included, 2 guys, 2 days for £300.

£300 a day....with bed and board included and no materials!!! He is taking you for a mug and so is your DP, he is putting his step brother first and chucking YOUR money at him!

Get local quotes and show your dp, it would probably work out cheaper its madness, nobody charges £300 a day!

He shouldnt be charging family MORE than he would charge customers, greedy git.

I live in London so decorating is expensive. It's also a biggish house in a naice area so tradesmen often bump up the prices a bit and even I think £260 a day is steep. Imguess it depends how quick they work. I had our living room painted recently - huge room, three coats and the ceiling repaired and painted and I paid £500.00 all in.

Go to Mybuilder.com, get a few quotes (and check the reviews) and see if you can get it done cheaper locally.

Wow, what a difficult situation. Just say you can't afford his rates and get local quotes to prove how much cheaper it is. You're not a cash cow for these two just because they're out of work. You wouldn't pay shedloads extra for an out of town decorator if it wasn't him so why do it just because it's a brother when he's not doing you any favours?

Just wanted to add his assistant is actually a decorator too, doesn't just pass him his brushes

Expat- yes definitely he will have a claim in respect of his mortgage payments. But i mean that it's also possible to claim that, aside from mortgage payments, you have a right to a share because you have improved a property. It's that kind of claim that paying the dp will prevent.

OP if he's living there an paying towards the mortgage he can make a claim - unless you have receipts for the work? Or quotes? You know for tax purposes?

Or you could by him to sign a remnant agreement - I mean why not? He'll have to pay rent and have no claim!

Your not in a partnership this isn't how people behave!

As for DB either get quotes or when DP is looking after his child - you ca decorate - unless he charges for babysitting?

Yanbu op, you seem to have your head screwed on though so I'm not sure why you are allowing him to treat you like a mug. Did your "dp" give you "mates rates" on the work he did? Did you get an invoice for it?

Basically as we're not married and he's not on the mortgage it works out better this way, short term obviously.

If we buy together and/marry in the future, he will do the work for free but then when we sell he'll have a stake in the property.

I think it's pretty fair.

I think the disagreement is over the fact the brother is working away from home. You think he should accept less money because you are providing board, but he thinks he should get more money because he has to work away from home.

I would tend to agree with the brother to be honest, and if I was offered work that took me away from my own home for a bank holiday weekend, I'd expect to be paid a premium, as I'd prefer to go back to my own home at night. You'd be better off just getting a local decorator.

Have you started another thread about this..?

Yes in chat, I wanted to know the average price for decorators. Then decided I had more of an Aibu gripe and rephrased my question...

I understand he's working away from home and would like more because of this, I kind of agree.

I also think he's charging quite a lot over the odds though... Considering he charges a lot less back home and it's work he wouldn't otherwise have.

He does make money on his assistants wage too..

As for the Sunday/bank holiday thing I'm a bit of the 'take it or leave it' mind. Not really happy paying much more than normal. I don't need it done in those days, they are the days he's offered. I know that may sound mean.

OP this isn't a fair arrangement. Your DP benefits from this arrangement far more than you do. Does he provide invoices for the work that he does on the house? (I predict the answer is no). How could you prove that he has been paid for this work if it came to it? He can argue that he has spent X amount doing up your house, whereas in reality he has gained an income.

Why would he be cross about you wanting other quotes for the decorating work if it's not his house? I suppose he arranged this with his db and then presented it to you as a done deal that you had no choice but to accept.

My DH is a decorator, a day rate of £150 pp is about right for mates rates. If there are 2 of them working on your property the work will get done twice as quickly. So although £300 per day sounds like a lot, you would pay a local decorator the same amount but over a longer period of time. As for the putting them up and feeding them, if they were to pay for a hotel it wouldn't make the job 'worth it'. My Dh is very busy currently, so you might find if you use someone local they won't be able to schedule the work in for a few weeks.