Is life harder for unattractive people?

[CherryPicking]

I know life can be hard for lots of reasons, and that discrimination can take many forms more serious than this, but putting all other factors aside just for now, is day to day life that little bit harder for less attractive people? For example, are people less likely to be accepting of someone behaving assertively, either at work or elsewhere, if the person in question isn't easy on the eye? (I'm not much to look at myself if that makes any difference). What about things like job interviews or social situations, meeting new people?

Special One day you must tell me why (and how you missed the obvious signs on some of the recent threads we were both on). However, if you PM me your photo, I will rate you out of ten and tell Dutch

PS That's a joke, before anyone gets on their high horse!

Justine, really sorry about your experience
Unfortunately life is easier when you're beautiful/more attractive/etc. But this kind of depends on what you consider with saying the word ''attractive''. I believe that what being positive makes life a lot easier than being physically attractive. It's all a matter of perspective. If someone calls you ugly, it's really not good for your self-esteem, you feel like crap. I've been there. tbh I still am. But I don't pay attention. I don't think about bitches who try to get me down just because of my looks. I focus on the more important and better stuff in life, like the fact that my children are alive and awake, they see, hear, walk, and are with no disabilities. So, if anyone calls you ugly, just smile at them (sometimes it will make them go on with the insults), bitches get really mad when you dgaf.
PS: Sorry if I sound like a hippie, I get that a lot

2 exes and DH say im close looks wise to Salma Hayek.

Seth I don't know! It's just the way you talk. Obviously I can 'see' it now, but I honestly thought you were a young mum like me

I8sum That's probably the only bloody good thing about invisible disabilities - no one questions me on my diet, exercise etc.

Seth as our token male, can you tell us something? Do men do this too? Frequently question your eating and exercise habits? Because I think it's all tied up in the messy knot that is Women And How They Look.

aw I was looking forward to being bowled over my your beauty maybe beauty is in the eye of the beholder hey? The ten out of ten was joke as I thought that as some one who has declared through out this thread how beautiful they are - you'd be able to take a joke - maybe not.

I don't any feminists that would purposely come on to a thread to talk about how being beautiful effects their life - infact I think people who are truley 'beautiful' would be somewhat embarrassed.

I know friends that think they are beautiful but in reality they are average. They have great self esteem and thats what's makes them feel 'beautiful' - not necessarily that they are 'classically' beautiful.

I've been told lovely things about myself but I know in reality I look like Rod Stuart when I wake up so I don't let it go to my head

Looks at mosquito bites< Jealous, Helena!
Maybe we should start a who have you been told you look like thread, lighthearted? I'd do it but I'm a coward. DH thinks I look like Margot Robbie. But then again, I think he looks like Shemar Moore, so we both roll our eyes at each other

seth

I do think there's a world of difference between 'I'm beautiful' and 'I'm average'. Beauty is very subjective after all- I wouldn't think much of someone who said 'I'm beautiful' if only because they wouldn't appear to understand that.

I know that while my model friend would happily say she was attractive/good looking, She wouldn't say beautiful.

Well, we're all entitled to our opinions Dutch If you think I'm full of shit? Well.. It's the internet. From all the posts I've seen you put up I personally think you are a man and a troll. So life goes on.

Anyway, personally I think it's something that needs to be acknowledged. We can talk about the horrible media influences, but until we discuss amongst ourselves why we behave a certain way, nothing will change. Women challenge other women about their appearance all the time, things even the most ardent MRA wouldn't notice.

I've never actually seen on the Feminism board, a honest discussion about physical appearance. I'd be very interested in what ideas people had to combat female rivalry over looks.

That's just really made me laugh

Do because I have a differnt opinion on labelling yourself 'beautiful' (which many people have have on this thread) am a troll and a man

Brilliant

See? The attacking is already happening and I'm a stranger on the internet to you. It's quite sad we cannot just be honest about looks without this stuff happening.
Women attack each other over looks. Men don't do that, in my experience. Obviously some men will be bitchy about a woman's looks, but it's nowhere near as prevalent as what women do to each other.

No, Dutch, I've thought you were male since I saw a few comments you made on a thread a few months ago. My point was it's the internet. Anyone can be anyone. We either go on faith, or it's pointless.

Anyway, does anyone want to discuss either points lots of posters have made, or the thread question?

Wow! Special loving that photo. Definitely a 9, Dutch...

I'm not sure I can answer your question. I could definitely exercise more. I've not overweight, but I'm not at all toned. But I have always been that way, no matter how active I have been - maybe its genes? However, at the same time, I would not allow myself to get seriously overweight. I don't worry about my looks because I know I am generally "average" looking and am not the sort of guy loads of women would lust after and I subscribe to the "this is me, if you don't like it, then clearly I'm not right for you". I would never expect anyone to change for me or vice versa.

I think that's probably true for a lot of men (I have no beer belly but plenty of guys do and they don't necessarily struggle to find people). I think men care far less about how a woman looks than women think men do, to be honest. I think women put themselves under far more pressure because of how they believe other women perceive them and their looks. The celebrity culture and selfies among young women these days would tend to bear that out.

Some men very definitely have types that they go for and stick with - guys who spend a lot of time down the gym tend to go for more athletic women. Some women will only date premiership footballers, no matter what the footballer looks like!! Some of us have dated all types. Generalisations, but actually we're all different.

Hi special this ^ is crap treatment and you don't deserve it. Don't let them bait you

Actually specail it's actually women claiming they are beautiful and not average that's an issue because if you place yourself in such high self regard it means there will always be those you think are less fortunate than you and that's a major issue with our teens. You won't see a serious thread about beauty on the FB as it can't be taken seriously - yet you see that as combative. Your trying to blame the media - yet you have seen pictures and think that you represent that 'beauty'

Intelligence, integrity and many more factors are so much more important that somebody's face. I can think 'she looks lovely' or 'she is beautiful' yet the person to the side of me might not agree.

I could look in the mirror and think 'wow, I'm stunning" yet someone else might just think I'm average. It's subjective. When folk claim to be beautiful is conceited.

You called me a troll (which is agsinst da rulz) and said I was man yet I'm attacking you?

Do feminists play the victim?

Genes definitely play a part. My mum has a really weird belly from pregnancy, even though she's quite petite. I inherited that. My DS1 likes to grab it, wibble it around and shout jelly

I think you're spot on about that. If I dress up, it's for other women, not men. Even when I was single. It was all about fitting in, but secretly hoping you looked the best. I'm glad those years are over!!

I think we (as in women) attack other women because we're sorta set against each other by the media. Hell, even children's story. Cinderella vs wicked step mum. Snow White vs wicked step mum. (I'm sensing a theme here...) But seriously, we're told to fight for top dog, alpha female if you will. But because women are socially conditioned to be 'sweet and nice,' it has to passive aggressive. Men pick.know their alpha via strength. Women have to use more insidious means.

Intelligence, integrity and many more factors are so much more important that somebody's face.

Exactly, so why are you so angry at the idea of someone calling themselves beautiful? I doubt you'd have the same reaction if someone said they had a genius IQ. And that's just something you're born with too isn't it?

I think we (as in women) attack other women because we're sorta set against each other by the media

you might do that but not all women do.

Thank you tent, I won't.

Dutch this is my last comment to you on this subject. You brought up the internet and how you thought I was lying, so I agreed and said I also thought you were lying. Report me if you want, but yes, I do think you're purposely goady and male. End of discussion.

Seth, do you find your DW frets a lot more about her female friends' opinions on hr in any aspect (looks, parenting, the house etc) and she seeks their validation much more so than yours? Again, alpha female.

I suck at science. I wish Cote would show up and give us a run down on why we act this way

I think calling yourself beautiful is a bit taboo Bunty, some can even read their friends minds and know they'd never dare say it! There's even examples of acceptable adjectives... That all mean beautiful. Honestly I used it because I saw it somewhere in the thread when I first posted. I suspected I'd get hounded but not over the word, over daring to admit I'm good looking. remember, women must always put themselves down.
It is very interesting to see the reactions, I must admit.

I never find people who say they have a gsoh funny either. Not remotely.

Special No point asking me that question, been single 6 years! But I would say that the one ex-partner I lived with for 10 years wasn't fussed what anyone else thought. She wore what she liked and that was that. But I've known a female friend who pretty much everyone, male or female, regarded as very attractive and with a great figure was always making comments that she was "fat" (she wasn't), that she had a "big arse" (she didn't) and once admitted that she hadn't let her first serious boyfriend see her naked until they'd been together six months (they'd slept together many times, but weren't living together). She seriously ran herself down and believed what she was saying; it wasn't to get other people to fawn round her, as she would only say this to one or two very select friends.

specail I wish I was male!! I'm 28 weeks pregnant and v. Uncomfortable. Do you see how you can be convinced your right but your actually way off? Go through my posts

Where did I bring up the Internet and said you were lying? You might think your beautiful but others might not - that's my point. Stop telling porkie pies to fit your wild accusations.