Is life harder for unattractive people?

[CherryPicking]

I know life can be hard for lots of reasons, and that discrimination can take many forms more serious than this, but putting all other factors aside just for now, is day to day life that little bit harder for less attractive people? For example, are people less likely to be accepting of someone behaving assertively, either at work or elsewhere, if the person in question isn't easy on the eye? (I'm not much to look at myself if that makes any difference). What about things like job interviews or social situations, meeting new people?

I think it is easier - one example is that we have to cross a very busy road at work and there are certain ladies who have no problem because lorries and cars will stop to let them cross.
Having said that when I know someone, if they're lovely I'll think they're attractive whatever they look like, and I'll treat them more favourably because they're nice people.
So maybe on first impressions attractive people have an easier life but for anything deeper, nice people have an easier life?

I don't know, you tell us. :) seriously, the threads here are getting more and more ridiculous. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder so who is to say who is unattractive.

I have "bag lady days - and "supermodel days . I know when I look 10/10 I get more respect and attention , in shops etc .

I think attractive people do have it easier as we're programmed to like beautiful people - I'm sure I read this somewhere - although we do change our minds if we don't like their personality, the instinct is to like them.

I am not attractive and struggled to attract a partner when I was younger. It's very hurtful when friends get a lot of attention and you get none. I consider myself nice or pleasant looking now. I have the kind of face people like and trust. And happily I met my Dh and I am no longer lonely. I don't think my self esteem has ever recovered from being labelled fat and ugly in high school though.

I think people who are better looking than average or have a lot of charisma do have an easier time, generally. I am better looking than average and have a soft, kind, honest face. I look very approachable. I think this is an advantage too, strangers are on side even before I speak. Little things like loosing my train ticket and when I explained, I was let through, no fine. I needed a workman to do a little extra work and as it didn't take long, he didn't charge me extra. I get served quickly at the bar...

It's not just looks either. I know someone who people find intimidating just because he's tall and broad. He's lovely, such a softy but gets treated differently because of his height

Life is probably more difficult for those at either end of the spectrum. Very beautiful people may not be taken seriously or be resented by others simply due to their looks.

People who are not aesthetically pleasing to look at apparently earn less money than the beautiful.

My old gran used to say, 'handsome is as handsome does' and as teenagers we laughed but she was right. If a beautiful person behaves badly or is inconsiderate to others then they're ugly in my eyes.

It sounds twee but a plain person's face can light up when they smile.

My daughter is is convinced she unattractive but puts in effort, makes the most of her different looks with piercings and has an interesting look and the overall impression is great, she looks like a character, she looks fun and like she's a teenager having a good time and enjoying her age.

Anyone who feels unattractive should work on their looks like we work for

exams or carrer goals, you may not end up looking like a model but you'll have confidence and that can fool the world into thinking your prettier than you are. I admire my daughter not crying into a mirror and making the most of what she has.

Many good looking people end up stressing about their looks more than average people, I've had some stunning mates who were convinced they were ugly, while average people stop worrying as they get older and get everything they want through effort.

I don't like my looks and never have and that has affected me through life...my own thoughts about myself. I desperately wanted to be beautiful and slim but in actual fact I wouldn't like the attention so as I've got older in beginning to feel I want to be healthy and fit more than beautiful. I have wasted my life a lot through negative thoughts. I see people beautiful and not so beautiful loving life so I think it's more what we project about ourselves and our confidence that makes life Perhaps easier. But if you are stunning and live in a war torn country it might make life even harder so it's all about perspective, place and time. Still wouldn't mind being nicer looking and thin though lol!!!!

I'm curvy and if I walk out the door in summer clothes I get unwanted attention, I'm 43, not flattered and a bit embarassed, I do wonder if I should just cover up but why should I get boiling hot for stupid men. I even get hassle when I'm out with my dad or kids and it's been this way since I was 13.

Being good looking can be really hard

Ah come on special show is a picture of yourself, I'm really intrigued now!

I was good looking when I was younger. Now I'm old I'm invisible. I didn't realise how much easier my life was until I stopped getting served first at the bar, if I went to get anything for my car they would fit it for free, tradesmen would do extra jobs for nothing. Not sure though how much this has to do with being good looking AND young. But it was nice while it lasted. 😀

I'm ugly - and yes I feel like if I was pretty people would be nicer - that could be down to the confidence that I visibly lack due to my fuglynes - I've always been a bit of a easy target - if I was pretty I'd be more confident and there for I think people would have more respect for me .

I am also amazed at people who label themselves so extremely

I am beautiful
I am ugly

I feel sad at the people who claim they are are ugly and I bet they aren't

I've spent my whole life being told I'm beautiful, I don't think I am, but I am currently getting modelling work even though I'm approaching 50, so I guess I'm fairly easy on the eye. (I'm not glamorous. I don't dress 'nice' or wear make-up, so none of it is grooming)

Has it helped me? Has it fuck. Men have treated me like an object, I've been a trophy girlfriend multiple times, and once they get to know me and realise I have a brain and an opinion and am not just a doll to be fucked and paraded, they are often intimidated or feel the need to tear me down. I've not had a spectacular career, in fact it's probably hindered me in work too as women can be bitchy and men assume I'm vain or thick. I'm dyslexic so left school with crappy exams and have never had a 'good' job, so I don't see why attractiveness makes anyone's life easier. I agree with everything Umbongo says on the first page.

Confidence and being nice to people gets you far further in life than great cheekbones and big tits. A decent degree and a trust fund would've been far more useful than my apparently above averagely attractive face.

Of course.

Some beautiful people are convinced that women hate them 'because they're beautiful' but all other things being equal they will be given the job/chance/opportunity/smile/seat/free coffee.

For every person out there who is sniffy to somebody beautiful I think there are ten who are (due to their own insecurities and need for validation) sniffy to unattractive people.

I'm in the middle by the way.

Someone can be beautiful looking but have an ugly personality, I've met a few of those over the years...

As a plumpish (invisible) 50 yr old, I will never turn heads in the street, but my friends tell me I'm beautiful. That means a lot to me.

When I was younger, I was very slim and considered pretty. My relationships with men, and female friends were different... less accepting and loving.

I like it better this way.

My husband took a picture of me in my swimming costume today. The backdrop was stunning and I was agonising about putting it on my fb post (I use it as a holiday diary), because I look fat (I am). My son (16) looked over my shoulder and told me I should use it as a profile picture. I haven't, but it was nice to see myself through his eyes.

I think ultimately, the people who matter see the whole you.

I love my soul more than my face and body.

I am overweight and ugly. I'm always trying to be open and friendly but I find people can be cold quite a lot of the time. I get ignored in shops and cafés a lot. When I was in school and college I found that teachers would be really short with me if I asked questions.

Going out with friends was torturous. On one occasion I was on a hen party having a lovely time (even though I was at my heaviest at the time) and a guy walked up to me outside a bar and said very loudly 'I want a dreamboat not a fucking tugboat!' Then looked back at his mates and they all laughed. I was humiliated. Sadly things like that happening were not rare.

I am heavily pg at the moment but have decided to lose the excess weight and make more of an effort with my appearance once the baby is born. I found that most people are much friendlier and warm when I am slimmer and have made more of an effort with my appearance.

Wow umbongo it must be awful to think so highly of yourself. Because im hot Because im beautiful you also sound vain

Interestingly from this thread it seems that fat = ugly. It never occurred to me to think that way. Some of the most beautiful women I've met were large and were very well put together. Co-ordinated and carried themselves with confidence and grace.

I suppose if you exude confidence then it can get you a long way. I'm thin and have noticed days where I'm feeling a bit low in myself I definitely reflect that feeling.

Just adding to what I wrote, above, my small DD happens to be genuinely beautiful in a very classic way (large brown eyes, tumbling blonde curls, heart-shaped face). She definitely does not look like me (though she has my eyes, that's about the only thing!) I was always very aware I was quite a plain-looking child! I am a bit to have produced such a gorgeous thing, no idea where the genes have come from (DH is perfectly fine-looking, but not super-gorgeous). It really isn't just mum-goggles, honestly: we get comments on her all the time (people coming up to us in the street to say she looks like a porcelain doll etc., what a beautiful child she is and so on.)

I was out with DD in the town centre shopping today and was thinking of this thread - I suddenly really noticed how other people reacted to her - warm smiles and approving glances everywhere, a free extra cake when we stopped to have a snack, assistants cooing over her in shops and commenting on her appearance - just general warm approval and admiration. It was a bit of a shock to realise how she is treated actually - I don't remember getting such a reception from the general public as a perfectly ordinary-looking child! It made me feel a bit weird to think that she will grow up taking all of this social approval for granted. I'm pleased of course that she is so lovely, but can't help feeling a bit odd about it, maybe worried for her future.

I do think that confidence is extremely attractive. People will be receptive and kind to a confident person regardless of how they look, generally speaking.

I am the lifelong owner of a face which is impassive (or miserable if you prefer) at rest. I had resting bitch face long before there were any "hilarious" memes coining the term.

Since I was about 18 (so not quite ten years ago) I have felt much more confident in my own skin, how people interact with me has changed for the better. But probably I am interacting with them more positively. I don't think people are laughing at me when they smile at me in the street anymore, I just smile back. Or even smile first. I still get "I thought you were a bit intimidating/aloof when I first met you but now I think you're really nice" sometimes from newer acquaintances but only very occasionally. Whereas when I was younger it was pretty standard.

Obviously to be overconfident and arrogant is as unattractive as extreme under confidence in terms of how people will respond to you.

Wayfarers - make her have some screaming tantrums , knock over some produce , rub wildly up and down the aisles , and annoy elderly shoppers

I know what you mean my
Friends DD is stunning and even though they are all 8 - the boys all 'want to marry her' - what must it be like to be so adored at such a young age ? If you were a more normal child yourself it must be a funny feeling

Haha - she definitely does all those things! She looks like she'd be a classic sort of Victorian-style passive "angel in the house" but actually she is - ahem- "spirited"

Yes, she's already getting a lot of attention from the little boys, even at nursery! I was informed by the mum of one of them that apparently he had "married" DD in a ceremony in the nursery garden Was a bit taken aback....

Not sure if I'm sort of mildly jealous of the attention she receives (at least on my own plain child behalf ), or sad and worried about it TBH, probably a bit of both!