I'm always the one taking the photos at parties/outings, but...

[user1470271524]

SOME of my friends always mock me for always taking photos as they don't take any at all, some of them even make me feel bad/embarrassed at the time by pointing it out & making comments...

BUT THEN later some of the same people ask me if i'll send the photos to them, and they're all thrilled to see them next day, talk about them all and have a laugh over them on WhatsApp groups, use them for profile photos/Instagram posts etc.
And then 2/5/10 years later they become treasured memories for everyone, are used for various talking points, presents/cards, photo cakes and general reminiscing.

And if I didn't take them then we'd have no photos at all of so many milestones and special occasions. But it's alright, I just brush it off and do my own thing. I should add i'm a photographer so I do enjoy taking photos even when just on my phone and have an eye for things maybe others don't care about.

However..
The other night we went on a goodbye meal for a friend who is emigrating half way round the world AND it was the first time in 5 years every single one of us had been together under same roof and not likely to happen again for who knows how many years - an occasion on which even people who don't normally take photos would deem photo worthy for a few memories, or at least one group photo.

One friend who strangely is usually the one up for photos and even suggested taking a few photos with me herself that night, kept making jibes about me. We had just two group photos done, one sitting down on the table before eating and later one when we had the surprise cake brought out.
The rest were just of me taking fun Snapchats for myself (photos which disappear after 24 hours) of the food, the amazing decor, the cake being brought out etc normal stuff which either doesn't involve anyone else, no one even notices i'm taking them, no one is posing for them or is pretty normal stuff to photograph.

However she kept saying in a stunned manner, "I've never taken so many photos like this before in a restaurant.." - TWO group photos? Which people can choose to be part of voluntarily?

Then when another friend was suggesting we should go to a nature trail walk soon she said to her "Don't take Rose, she'll just take loads of photos". I usually just let these digs slide, but this time I wasn't playing, I hadn't done anything to warrant such mean comments and without missing a beat I cheerily said "It's alright i'll go with my family" to which she made a really bitchy sound mocking and mimicking what I had just said as she didn't like that I actually replied making her comment look like the pathetic jibe it was :|

Sigh, I just feel really crappy about this now, but also glad that I said something.

myownprivateidaho Hell yes I would say something if a "friend" was pissing about on snapchat and taking photos during a meal out. And if she kept insisting what she was doing was fine, then I would either leave or get MY phone out and tell her exactly that - playing on my phone is better than spending time with her.

I'd say something in rl too. It's rude anti social behavior and judging by the op's determination to keep posting tedious "justification" for her snap happy stance, it would fall on deaf ears anyway.

The op is showing absolutely no social awareness at all - I mean, comes on AIBU is told repeated she is being unreasonable, then insists again and again she isn't

Ask if people are getting annoyed with the photo taking and what do they suggest

It's pretty clear what she needs to do!

Love the way you've literally edited my post to omit the relevant bits that completely change the story (such as the girl in question herself asking to take a photo with me) to suit your narrative. WOW. So clever

I edited your post to aid readability and focus on the fact that your photo taking clearly amounts to what I would consider puerile and excessive behaviour. IMO none of the detail I omitted did anything to materially support your belief that nobody should be pissed off with your inane conduct.

Maybe it's a generational thing but if I found myself in the company of someone who was incessantly on their phone or taking selfies I would very quickly go and find someone more interesting and socially adept to engage with.

But you crack on. Ask for opinions and then totally disregard any and all that fail to validate you.

I'm going to go against the grain, okay maybe the OPs behaviour is irritating to this group of friends but this friend was just being unpleasant.
If you find a friends behaviour irritating you dont made snide little digs at them about it, its obvious the OP didn't know she was being annoying and thinks shes doing something nice so you would tell her quietly about it. Making snide little digs just makes you nasty tbh.
Plus photos being taken aren't that irritating, a snapchat takes 1 second to take. I dont take many photos myself but am always really grateful if someone else does, its nice to have photos to look back on in the future. It really doesn't interrupt the evening. I don't know if its just my friends, and the fact I actually like them, but even if I'm with someone who takes 100 photos I still manage to enjoy the evening with them and not find their photo taking annoying.

My MIL is always making us sit in groups for photos, we never get to see them, my poor DD constantly has a camera in her face when she's with them. It really grates on me. We take the odd photo of DD if she's doing something funny/ lovely/ etc but they take it to the extreme. If my friends started doing it too, I'd be pretty peeved.

It does seem OP that you are one of those posters who asks am I being unreasonable? And everyone says YES! And you keep saying "no I'm not!"

It may seem normal to you but please believe that to a lot of other people that would be very very annoying.

Other people have different views to you.

Did you actually want to know if you were being unreasonable, or did you want us all to just agree with you? Because so far you haven't accepted a single point that opposes your view that you are completely reasonable....

The thing is taking pictures of your food etc on snapchat is all a bit "look at me, look at me, I'm so arty and cool". That might sound mean, and I'm sorry if so, but when I see snapchats like this I just think "oh bore off, literally nobody cares". If people were taking them on a night out with me they would get a fair amount of eye rollung as it's just blatant attention seeking

Err iceroad captain I didn't ask whether you would "say something" I asked whether you would say the things that you're saying to the OP in real life. Yeah, you might say, "mate, your photo-taking is really annoying, stop that now please" (so would I). But unless you're a psychopath you wouldn't say to an over-eager instagrammer that you were out with, "you are making this the night out from hell" or "I'd rather be on my phone than talk to you" or "no one is going to want have a night out with you again" or any of the other really horrible comments that have been aimed at the OP.

Idaho, you seem to be missing the concept of aibu.

The OP asked if she was being unreasonable, many have concluded she was.

My first comment on this thread was to say I would have told the OP to put her phone away.

The OP then left screeds and screeds of obtuse, self justifying nonsense (IMO obviously), totally ignoring any view that challenged her.

And I didn't say "you are making this the night out from hell", I said it sounded like it. And it does.

Hope that's clarified things a bit for you.

...and I have been in the company of people like the OP who have spoiled the night with their selfish snapchatting nonsense and told them to quit it.

In all cases they have immediately ceased and desisted and apologised.

The OP in this case carried on...and on....and on....

Perhaps this is why she got a "bitchy" comment, unless of course you think the person who pulled her up in RL was a psychopath for doing so.

myownprivateidaho Well judging by the thread, this is how it would go:

Friend: "Mate, your photo-taking is really annoying, stop that now please."

OP: "But it's only a few!"

Friend: "It's annoying."

OP: "You can't even see me do it!"

Friend: "Um, yes I can, that's how I know you've been doing it."

OP: "But you're on your phone!"

Me: "You're making this a night out from hell. / Yeah, I'd rather do that than talk to you. / You know we're not going to come out with you again if you keep doing it?"

Yeah, that's psychopathic.

Anyway, OP doesn't need defending. She's doing enough of it herself.

Nothing worse than the friend that won't stop taking photos and posting them on social media every time you go out. (But your friend was xenophobic with her comment about you being like a person from Malaysia) - so would ditch her very quickly anyways.

If I'm honest I'm not a fan of people who take photos A LOT. It depends on how much your taking them. I remember a friend's bday one time where all she did was take photos. She just refused to enjoy it without getting her phone out - it became a chore.

I actually think your friend was a bit nasty to make snide comments and digs rather than just say 'can we please stop with the photos now, it's getting on my tits'. I'd feel more at ease with saying that to a good friend than to cause an atmosphere with bitchy comments. It can be annoying to be in the company of someone who is constantly on their phone or taking photos though. Maybe just try and limit the photos in company and see if they/you miss having them after.

OP - I think most people agree that although there's nothing wrong with taking photos, your friends are finding this annoying, which they are as entitled to feel as you are to take the photos.

Honestly, I would also be annoyed, but I can't quite pinpoint why - it's just irritating having someone snap-snap-snapping all the time.

You're perfectly entitled to Snapchat, but you have to accept that if you do so when with these friends they will find you annoying.

captain, the concept of aibu is to tell people whether or not they're being unreasonable. I post on aibu a lot. Clearly I'm not objecting to that concept, or objecting to the idea of telling the OP she's unreasonable (I think she is mostly, as I posted upthread). I'm objecting to doing that in a way that is totally disproportionate and likely to be hurtful. It's possible to state your view of photos without being egregiously insulting. I think asking yourself whether you'd sit down in person with a teenager (as I suspect the OP is) and tell them to their face that their slightly irritating overusage of their camera phone means that spending time with them sounds like the night from hell or that you'd prefer to be on your phone than talk to them is kind of a good test as to whether it's appropriate to say it to them online. Clue: it isn't.

I'm a bit mystified that the trivial matter of taking photos on a night out can cause such consternation - either in RL or on an Internet forum. But then I don't understand the controversy of eating food or applying makeup on trains either. I have a lot to learn in life apparently.

Speaking of egregious idaho maybe you'd like to explain why you compared me to the Taliban on a previous thread, then went suspiciously quiet when I called you on it. You're hardly lily white yourself dear. Also you have no idea how old the op is, stop making assumptions and expecting the rest of us to have the same ones, eh?

....and I haven't searched back for that, I remember your username because I was so gobsmacked at your ridiculous accusation.

Your friends might see it that taking that many photos at an event means you can put very little effort into socializing with those around you, yet have a perfect record of the wonderful time it was and can prove it.

It's like those cook shows, like when Jamie presents this effortlessly cool dinner party with his trendy friends. It looks lovely as a show, but behind the scenes it's really the makeup artist and the sound man's son sat round the table, none have really met before, the food is almost a day old and inedible & everyone has had enough. It's not real.

Your friends have tried to tell you clearly to stop treating their meet ups as a way to present an image. They want to socialize and have fun. You are not fun because you don't seem to care about what actually happens you just want to create a good image of it. It also makes you feel good, as if your role as chief photographer relinquishes you from any social niceties but by doing that it actually makes others uncomfortable. My mother used to make a huge fuss about cooking for dinner parties but would hide in the kitchen and not talk to anyone. If questioned she would say everyone was ungrateful because she'd made so much effort over the food. I guess she was too shy to really get involved but didn't want to miss out. She also like cooking (and being a bit of martyr) but didn't want the hassle of the rest of it.

I could be really wrong here so why not test yourself? Make someone else chief photographer for an event and you socialise without taking photos?

I think it simply boils down to:

This group of friends don't like it. It irritates and annoys them, and they'd like you to stop. You said you rarely catch up as a group anyway, maybe just accept that's how they feel and not take pics when around them. After all, it's only a few hours every once in awhile.

Personally I'd never insist on doing something (trivial, I mean) that deeply irritated someone I care about. Whether you agree with them or not, isn't respecting their feelings a basic rule regarding loved ones?

Snao away with your other mates and when you're alone. An evening a month with no photos won't hurt!

?? I don't remember comparing you to the Taliban. I don't remember interacting with you at all. Link? I don't always check back after I've commented.