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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think 14 yo's are capable of opening a tin of beans?

84 replies

GladRagsandHandbags · 02/08/2016 15:56

DSD is with us for some of the summer hols.

DH asked her to help make a fry up breakfast at the weekend.
He gave her a ring pull tin of beans but she didn't know how to open it and nearly sliced her hand up when DH explained how to do it.

Are most 14 yo's like this?
I was like Shock

OP posts:
NeedACleverNN · 02/08/2016 15:56

I would have thought they could..especially a ring pull

Actual tin opener can be a bit more difficult

Lilaclily · 02/08/2016 15:57

Has she got an extra needs we should be aware of before commenting
I know my 9 year would do that fine but my 12 year would have trouble, he's hypermobile though

Plus it is really easy to pull the ring pull and cut your hand

Salmotrutta · 02/08/2016 15:58

To be fair, I have nearly sliced my finger off with those ring pulls in the past but I'm very surprised a teenager didn't know how it "worked"!!

Missgraeme · 02/08/2016 15:59

My 14 year old son is pretty good in the kitchen. Can use oven /micro etc. .cant do dishes tho.

myownprivateidaho · 02/08/2016 16:00

It doesn't seem very kind to post this. Big deal, we've all been in the situation of not having picked up on something that everyone else ha, or have done a shitty job of something at some point.

Original poster
GladRagsandHandbags · 02/08/2016 16:01

She's in the gifted and talented stream at school, so no special needs.

OP posts:
DixieNormas · 02/08/2016 16:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BossWitch · 02/08/2016 16:06

Unless there are additional needs, they need to get a fucking grip on themselves and start learning how to function in the world. Unable to open a tunnel of beans with a ring pull - seriously?! Use the rest of the summer holidays to teach basic skills. Using kitchen equipment safely, basic diy stuff (how to change a bulb, reset a fuse box, use a screwdriver, spirit level, saw, that sort of stuff), how to use washing machine, how to change bedsheets. I couldn't believe the number of people I lived with at uni who couldn't do the simplest of things. Get her up to speed and if possible, give her a headstart!

Chinks123 · 02/08/2016 16:06

Well she's obviously not been taught how to open a tin of beans then. Simple things are usually simple because someone (parents usually) has shown us how to do it first.

FeliciaJollygoodfellow · 02/08/2016 16:06

My DSS wouldn't.

He was moaning the other day about not knowing how to hang washing out to dry because no one has ever shown him how.

He's 15!Grin

practy · 02/08/2016 16:09

Yes I agree that it is a good idea to teach her lots of basic things. Easy to criticise teenagers like this, but they only don't know because they have never had the chance to do it.

ExAstris · 02/08/2016 16:10

OP, you do know Gifted and Talented and SN are not mutually exclusive? My DS1 is, we believe, an aspie (diagnosis in progress) and is also academically very bright. It's not uncommon.

BertrandRussell · 02/08/2016 16:11

Personally, I think an NT 14 year old should be able to do absolutely anything necessary around the house.

nanetterose · 02/08/2016 16:13

I've found the more gifted and talented students take longer to learn the more boring aspects of life.
It is the flip side.
Gifted and talented within the boundaries of educational settings is always seen as some kind of superior being.
However the world needs all types ,types that get the practical side of life!
However,it is possible she knew how and was just worried about breaking her nails/ cutting her finger.

acasualobserver · 02/08/2016 16:14

Unable to open a tunnel of beans with a ring pull - seriously?!

To be fair, I was in my early 20s before I attempted the tunnel of beans.

BorpBorpBorp · 02/08/2016 16:15

The Tunnel of Beans is my absolute favourite ride at Thorpe Park.

Original poster
GladRagsandHandbags · 02/08/2016 16:16

''Unable to open a tunnel of beans with a ring pull - seriously?! Use the rest of the summer holidays to teach basic skills. Using kitchen equipment safely, basic diy stuff (how to change a bulb, reset a fuse box, use a screwdriver, spirit level, saw, that sort of stuff), how to use washing machine, how to change bedsheets. I couldn't believe the number of people I lived with at uni who couldn't do the simplest of things.''

This is what I'm worried about.
She's rapidly flying towards adulthood, wanting the hair/clothes and freedoms of adulthood but somewhat lacking the practicality's and responsibilities needed.

DH and I didn't draw attention to it but we are worried.

I have been in her life since the age of two and absolutely want the best for her.

As she's older she doesn't come to stay as often as she did as a child, so we are not as familiar as we were with how she is doing in some areas of her life.

OP posts:
ParadiseCity · 02/08/2016 16:17

It occurred to me the other day I have never explained to DS how to open a ring pull tin. I talked him through it on the phone, I was so proud to hear the sound of it opening, as it is the wierdest thing to try and describe instructions for!

If no one has ever shown you how to do something, its fair enough not to know how to do it... surely?

BertrandRussell · 02/08/2016 16:18

"I've found the more gifted and talented students take longer to learn the more boring aspects of life"

I've known lots of adults- particularly men- who pull this one too..............

mumofthemonsters808 · 02/08/2016 16:20

She probably does not know how to do it because she's never had to, my 14 year old only gets herself a drink, everything else food wise I do it for her, even the simple things like toast and sandwiches.My MAm did the same for me, for many years. If you want her to be able to prepare a meal, a few lessons and she'll soon get the hang of it.

Amelie10 · 02/08/2016 16:20

Goodness she sounds useless! She needs some lessons in basic skills.

woopywoo · 02/08/2016 16:21

But surely she's opened a can of pop before? Same principle?

BossWitch · 02/08/2016 16:21

Oh I love autocorrect sometimes - tunnel of beans is making me smile very broadly on an otherwise grey day!

Apologies for my lack of proofreading though Blush

VioletBam · 02/08/2016 16:22

I think YABU for expecting ALL 14 year olds to be able to open a ring pull.

Some people just have weak hands and wrists. I do. I struggle with them...always have as a matter of fact and I am 43 with no SN.

Not "useless" as someone said Hmm

Original poster
GladRagsandHandbags · 02/08/2016 16:23

Tunnel of beans made me Grin too!

OP posts: