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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be angry that people are downplaying my achievement?

483 replies

FruitCider · 27/07/2016 18:22

I feel very upset.

I found out this week that I'm graduating with a First, only just scraped one but its 70+ nethertheless.

I got really excited and posted it on my Facebook wall, and I've had really horrible comments such as "no one likes a show off", "getting a first won't make you better at your job", "I have got a 2:1, at least I had fun during my degree instead of spending my time with my nose in textbooks", "your employer won't care".

AIBU for just wanting a bit of recognition that I've done bloody well?!?!? My partner doesn't even know what it means, how do I explain it to him?

Feeling very woe is me. Sorry Confused

OP posts:
PaulDacreCuntyMcCuntFace · 27/07/2016 19:28

Well done love - a first is a huge achievement.

The nasty comments sound like jealousy. Suggest you find nicer friends and also a more supportive partner. If I worked my arse off and got a first I would be bloody gutted if my OH took the trouble to point out that I'd got 30% wrong.

ailith · 27/07/2016 19:28

CurlyBlueberry:
True. However, I wouldn't have had fun if I hadn't been at a respected and ancient university. My choice. Getting there was very important to me. I wouldn't have been happy with second best.

Fomalhaut · 27/07/2016 19:29

Well done you :)

Be rightly proud of yourself. A first is an achievement.

The current trend of anti intellectualism is awful. There is nothing wrong with having your nose in a book! what on earth is wrong with that? What wrong with being smart? What's wrong with working hard? I can't think of a single woman in the public eye who is celebrated solely for smarts. It's like it's not allowed. :(

If you'd have been all 'nurr nurr thickos! ' then fine, you'd be a twit, but to just say 'yay! Got a first, dead chuffed!' Is not gloating, or boasting. It's being rightly proud of the mix of ability plus hard work that gets you a first. Don't let them piss on your chips.

PaulDacreCuntyMcCuntFace · 27/07/2016 19:30

Ailith, next time you're seeing a nurse do take the time to tell them that you think their vocational degree devalues the system. I'm sure they'll appreciate it, because after all they only faff about laying their hands on fevered brows. It's not like they actually do anything, is it? Hmm

hunibuni · 27/07/2016 19:31

Well done! Nursing is most definitely not the easiest to do between juggling placements and coursework (esp pharmacology), nearly half of my cohorts left before they finished or had to take time off, so hats off to you for persevering!

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 27/07/2016 19:31

What is the subject and which university?

As soon as I saw this post, my spidey senses told me the poster was going to be a turd.

Hmm
MilesHuntsWig · 27/07/2016 19:31

Well done you!

thisisafakename · 27/07/2016 19:31

Why are university degrees dished out for vocational subjects, anyway? The system has been devalued, in my view

OK, well that's a nice thing to say to someone who has just done a degree in a vocational subject. Who decides what is and isn't valid to study? Have you every done a vocational degree? Can you be sure that it's not worthy of being a degree-level subject? I certainly can't say that and I did a very traditional degree at a traditional university. That does not make my degree better or worse than someone taking a vocational route.

Groovee · 27/07/2016 19:32

Congratulations x

ailith · 27/07/2016 19:32

Law and medicine are very competitive and those professions have always required a degree.
There has been a huge amount of bandwagon jumping in more recent times, though.

redexpat · 27/07/2016 19:32

Congratulations OP!🎓 Really bloody well done!

Please dump your partner. And yes delete all the negative friends. Uou just don't need that shit in your life, especially if you're a MH nurse!

allthingsred · 27/07/2016 19:32

That's amazing congratulations FlowersWineFlowers your fb friends are toss pots!!

CarlGrimesMissingEye · 27/07/2016 19:34

That's amazing congratulations.

WaitrosePigeon · 27/07/2016 19:34

Are there disrespected uni's, then?

CarlGrimesMissingEye · 27/07/2016 19:34

Oops. Stick a comma in please (only got a 2:1 Smile)

Girlgonewild · 27/07/2016 19:34

Well done. Of course it's brilliant but how can you live with a partner who doesn't even understand university courses etc? I could not. Always mate with someone who is similar in terms of intellectual knowledge, IQ, knowledge etc. How can he not know that? Does he not watch TV or read books which would have told him that kind of thing? What kind of newspaper does he read or radio station - key factor in finding someone bright as a partner.

However we all know it's the institution which really counts not the degree classification actually so other readers try to get into a top 10 university as for employment purposes that's the key thing.

puglife15 · 27/07/2016 19:34

Well done, and ignore them.

I wonder if they took offence to how you phrased it??

"omg I'm so chuffed, I got a 1st! Can't believe it"

Or

"Unsurprisingly I've been awarded a 1st. Such a shame others are too lazy or stupid to get the same"

MrsRyanGosling15 · 27/07/2016 19:34

I genuinely doubt Ailith has been to university at all. I detest nasty, jealous people. Clearly it just displays what is lacking within themselves.

Cutecat78 · 27/07/2016 19:35

Well done, feel proud Wine

WaitrosePigeon · 27/07/2016 19:35

Why are university degrees dished out for vocational subjects, anyway? The system has been devalued, in my view

Can you give me a reason why you would say that on a thread like this? Thanks

Graceymac · 27/07/2016 19:35

FruitCider I have a degree in Mental Health nursing too.
Having worked in the UK for several years at a time when most nurses were diploma trained, including myself at that time, and now living in a country where all nurses are degree trained I can tell you it does make a difference. To gain access to a diploma course at the time when I trained A-levels weren't even a requirement and I have to say that many of the nurses I encountered were not great. To gain entry to a degree program of any type there is the requirement that the student will have achieved reasonably good academic results to that point.
With ever increasing responsibilities being given to nurses, the development of Clinical Nurse Specialist posts and the development increasingly complex treatments I know who i would rather have looking after me.

gamerchick · 27/07/2016 19:35

Eh? You need new friends man Confused even the smallest thing I'm thrilled about on Facebook I get positivity. Delete the fuckers.

Huge well done man Grin Flowers

heyday · 27/07/2016 19:36

Nobody can get a first without working hard so well done to you!! The world is a very competitive place so that extra hard work and effort might just be the edge you need on the job front one day!!!

Skiptonlass · 27/07/2016 19:36

ailith

I've got a double first BSc Hons in a hard science area, from a Russel Group uni that is widely regarded as being the best place in Europe to study what I did. I've got two MSc degrees, a PhD and a postdoc, in hard science areas.

I think the op has done pretty darn well. I know, absolutely hand on heart, that I wouldn't cut it as a mental health nurse.

I've also marked student papers and we weren't actually allowed to give 100% on essay questions (yes you get essay questions in science, along the lines of ' show, in atomic detail, including electron shells the reaction of blah and blah ....' Etc.
Our multiple choice papers were negatively marked so again, almost impossible to get 100% (although I got a few high 90%s...)

Youve done great op. Hope you celebrate.

Dangermouse1 · 27/07/2016 19:36

ailith, the OP naming her institution would be pretty identifying since she's already named the course, maybe she doesn't want to be outed on MN. And unless you're in the field of mental health nursing I don't think you can necessarily be the judge of if it is or isn't a good course - these things vary by subject massively (and over time as staff move on) it's not as simple as an institution is all good or all bad.

OP, well done from me. It's a fab achievement.

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