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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to think that this lady has lost her mind ...

300 replies

kavvLar · 17/07/2016 19:09

South Kiosk at Martello Park Felixstowe out this status up on Facebook earlier today:

"Can we make ourselves perfectly clear to all parents who are too scared to disipline their children about tantrum screaming. We will give you five lenient minutes to ask the child to stop screaming and then we will ask the child ourselves. If that means you too having a tantrum about our having to speak to your child and hurling threats about not returning – that's really okay with us. We have a duty of care to the rest of our customers."

Cue hundreds of people flaming them on Facebook and 1* reviewing the business.

What on earth were they thinking?

OP posts:
GarlicStake · 18/07/2016 03:57

Feck Grin

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 18/07/2016 05:51

I saw a nearly 10 year old kid in a cafe today. She threw food on floor and pushed plates over. She made grumpy noises. It was my DD. She was hungry and needed to eat so we used a cafe. Some people had cats bum faces as they are a bit dim and probably post things like "not all kids have SN some are just brats". I hope their coffee gave them heartburn.

MumOfTwoMasterOfNone · 18/07/2016 05:59

Of course a two year old is old enough to be told to stop...but they wouldn't do it Grin
Unless of course they were actually scared of their parents reaction if they didn't do as they were told. I know I'd prefer my child not to be scared of repercussions of physical violence. Or of course, all us mums of toddlers could keep them from visiting anywhere adults go and they could continue to behave like toddlers for the rest of their days as they never learn or experience 'normal' behaviour.

honkinghaddock · 18/07/2016 06:18

My child can't behave. I will take him anywhere that I want and those that don't want to be around a disabled child can leave.

Mommawoo · 18/07/2016 06:48

Can we organise a tantrum protest? Like when a mother is asked not to breastfeed at a certain establishment then 500 mothers get together on facebook and descend on the place to breastfeed together.

Just imagine the post after she has to deal with 100 screaming toddlers......

NotYoda · 18/07/2016 06:54

Feck Grin

NotYoda · 18/07/2016 06:54

Mommawoo

Yes! It could be called a Lose-Your-Shit-In

Lifeisbeautiful2 · 18/07/2016 06:59

Facebook page gone now.

ApostrophesMatter · 18/07/2016 07:01

I feel a bit sorry for her. She's probably in the wrong job, frankly, but badly behaved NT children are annoying.

It's even more annoying when the parents are doing nothing to stop the bad behaviour. I feel sorry for the DCs growing up with no idea of how to behave in social settings.

x2boys · 18/07/2016 07:10

fanjo ,honkingGrinmother of a severly autistic six yr old here.

SoupDragon · 18/07/2016 07:19

If my child had been having a tantrum by an ice cream kiosk we would have left. With the said child tucked under my arm if necessary.

SoupDragon · 18/07/2016 07:24

As an aside, DS2 had meltdowns despite being NT. I will continue to describe them as such because that is what they were.

DS1 and DD had distinctly different tantrums.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 18/07/2016 07:45

Someone's got their assertive pants on today GrinWink

SoupDragon · 18/07/2016 07:47

Someone has their arsey pants on today :) :o

Blondeshavemorefun · 18/07/2016 07:52

Sure many will visit in the next few days to see this monster of an owner

Takings will go up

Sure someone once said there no bad publicity ......

Saying all that. Course she was wrong to touch the child.

I have seen children have tantrums (paddys) and some children have had them with me. It happens

personally I would have removed myself and child from the queue - or if with other children and no other adult - either explained to them we need to go to different booth and they would get an ice cream /treat

Agree some customers don't want to listen to non stop screaming - tho have to say if I'm not working I can switch off to kiddi noise Wink

She could of had a word with the parents - who could have decided to leave the 'establishment' queue

Or maybe she was trying supernanny tactics / she gets down to their level and sure she has held their wrists while talking to them

Sure the daily fail will be on the case 😂😂

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 18/07/2016 07:52

Of course, it's Monday!

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 18/07/2016 07:53

I have no strong feelings about the use of the word meltdown tbh.

MLGs · 18/07/2016 08:10

Aren't you supposed to ignore tantrums? I thought that was approved method of "dealing with it".

Thornrose · 18/07/2016 08:12

I only have a problem if it's the other way around. Dismissing a meltdown as a mere tantrum!

SteviebunsBottrittrundle · 18/07/2016 08:28

The origins of the term "throwing a paddy" aren't clear, but I can still hate the expression (I do). I've been called a "fucking paddy" as an insult before now (weird guy in a bar, clearly didn't like me for some reason - meh), so it's a bit too close to that for me. I tell people in RL I don't like it either. I don't think it's directly racist but it does have a bit of a nasty feel about it to me.

lastofthewintergin · 18/07/2016 08:48

I understand the sentiment in what she is saying. We have all been somewhere where a child is going crazy and the parent is sitting on their phone, having a chat with their mates and doesn't give a shit to be quite honest. I've personally told a child off for kicking my (much younger) child when the parents were nowhere to be seen (note, I told them to stop it, I didn't touch them!). I also don't like the inference by people that any misbehaving child must be autistic - OK, people can't make presumptions but hey there are just bad parents of naughty kids out there (that doesn't mean you can start having a go at people though!).

However.... this is a completely inappropriate thing to be putting up on Facebook. A 5 minute rule is just ridiculous! If a child is causing damage to a property (she said in a later post they were throwing chairs) then that's one thing, but a kid just crying in the queue?!?! We all know what kids can get like when they're tired / hungry / frustrated.

I don't like the lynch mob mentality, however it took her 10 hours to respond, allowing it to escalate out of all control, and her reply was just as bad as the initial post to be honest. All she needed to say, very quickly, was 'I am so sorry for the offence I have caused. I was having a very bad day personally and have now learned not to make my own frustrations public. It was inappropriate, an error of judgement and I have donated last weekend's profits to an autism charity. I hope this will put an end to this awful weekend.'

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 18/07/2016 08:50

i agree. Even if she was ignoring the possibility of invisible disabilities, which is irksome.

Allaboutcake · 18/07/2016 09:20

I watched it unfold. The owner made every social media mistake possible, so great was her zeal. Don't delete negative comments. Never try to shut the local paper out. The customer is almost always right... And when your customer is 2, don't threaten their parents.

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 18/07/2016 09:34

Oh boo, I went to the FB page to see what all the fuss was about and the page has gone offline.

This is what comes of going to bed at a respectable hour. Sad

Lelloteddy · 18/07/2016 09:37

She grabbed an already distressed two year old stranger by the wrists.

In no way, shape or form is that justifiable.

However the online feeding frenzy that ensued is so scary. There are some seriously disturbed people out there.

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