WIBU to ask for an eternity ring?

[Itsaplayonwords]

My DH and I had talked about how an eternity ring is usually given at the birth of your first child, however I told him not to buy me one at that time as we had spent a lot of money on our wedding (DD1 was a honeymoon baby) and the money was better used for baby things than on jewellery. It's my 30th birthday at the end of the year and I'd really like an eternity ring. DH would be spending money on a present for me anyway and there's nothing else I really want, but it's not the sort of thing you usually ask for. I know as well that if I did ask and he'd already planned to get me one, or something similar, then he'd feel as though I'd spoilt the surprise.

Should I ask or not?

choli that was kind of my point - that asking for an eternity ring, something which is symbolic for lots of people for whatever reason, seemed somewhat odd. But like I've said - it's more the style of a typical "eternity ring" that I would like so in that respect its no different to asking for anything else as a gift for my birthday.

Yes, I could buy it for myself but where's the sense in that for DH to just have to look for something else to but me in 6 months time? That said, if he already has an idea for a gift he would like to get me I wouldn't be disappointed not to get a ring, but if he were to ask what I'd like it seems like a good suggestion.

Buy, not but.

(Is it just me or does autocorrect seem worse in the MN app than anywhere else on the phone?)

I have a lovely eternity ring and wear it on my right hand. My partner had cancer last year and bought the ring as a thank you for all my support and love during this worrying time - we chose it together.

"One campaign slogan, aimed at husbands, was "She married you for richer or poorer. Let her know how it’s going"
That has to be the most unpleasant advertising slogan ever!

Yes, gruesome. I'm going to hope that was from relatively early in the campaign.

Lovely idea! It's not a new idea btw. My gran had one in 1928 and my mum in 1951. Neither of them had much money but it was considered a nice thing to do after the birth of the first child.

I had one for my engagement ring... I don't like the more traditional engagement ring but I do like these...
If it's something you'd really like, then say so...

Personally I wouldn't ask. He obviously will get you one at some point, and maybe it would be more special for both of you if it was a surprise.

Oh, sounds nice, an eternity ring. It seems that everyone sees them differently . Do you think it's too weird to have one if you aren't married or planning to , but have finished having children and been together 15 years?

I'm not sure how tradition started or what tradition you choose to follow matters. Each peace of jewellery is special to the giver and receiver. I love jewellery, had an eternity ring as my wedding band, so had a 3 stone on the birth of my daughter, have a different ring coming for a big birthday and another for our 10th anniversary. Each one is special to us, and has meaning to us. Some I have asked for, some have been discussions. Some I choose, some he did, some we did together. It's your life, your story, your traditions. If you would like a ring for your birthday, ask your husband. If you want a specific one choose it, if you want a surprise tell him that. Personally I wouldn't head off and buy one myself, because it's quite likely he is already thinking of getting you one at some stage.

Mislou, we have had a few customers who do just that. No plans to marry but wear a ring of some kind one that hand

My husband bought me a Trilogy diamond eternity ring on our 10th Anniversary. The diamonds represent past, present, future. He chose it himself and it is beautiful. I did not know he was getting it for me. The 10th is tin and i got him a tin of beans and he got me a tin of soup with a note on top saying he could do better if i went into town with him....we went and collected it as he had purchased it weeks before but had to have it made smaller as i habe tiny fingers.

Got mine for my 18th, 6 months after we eloped. 😂 Was a lot of 'this is it, get it here , you can park right outside if you go this way...' on my part. 13 years next week so all good. He'd bought me 5 rings in 18 months by then and swore he'd never buy me anymore, which he's stuck by unfortunately.

My wedding band is a narrow diamond eternity ring - I saw it and fell in love with it, despite planning on a traditional band. A few years ago DH bought me a beautiful ruby and diamond eternity ring to go with it - no 'significant' occasion, other than it being Christmas Then, last Christmas, he bought me an emerald and diamond ring to replace my original engagement ring, which is now massively too small and unresizeable due to the design - I was a size 8 when we got engaged, and I'm an 18 now! I love my rings - they're so colourful and unusualworn all together.

We chose the eternity ring together - he had an idea of what he wanted to give me, but he wanted to make sure I liked it before he bought it. Sensible, given the cost! He had it sized to fit me and went to pick it up himself though, and put it on my finger on Christmas morning. OP, I think it's perfectly fair enough to have a word with your DH

I've been asking for mine for 8 year after dc1! He finally decided to get one for me for my birthday in May when I'm pregnant! We negotiated and I got 2 Pandora charms instead and I'll get the ring for Christmas when my fingers are hopefully less sausagey!

I wouldn't ask, but I'd hint 😈
Go shopping for earrings and accidentally find an eternity ring that I absolutely love!! 😂

I don't get the point of an eternity ring either, but I am also not into expensive jewellery. I have a relative that spends thousands on jewellery/watches and I just don't get it. I'd much rather have a Vitamix

I've been with my partner 7 years and we have 1 ds. He had never bought me any jewellery before. I was hoping for a ring for my 40th, he asked what I'd like and I said I'd love a piece of jewellery I can keep, we picked out a lovely diamond necklace together but I was secretly hoping for a ring! So if I don't get an engagement ring, ever, is it ok to ask for an eternity ring instead? What's the deal here?

I got a eternity ring for my 30th birthday; but it was a surprise - he had researched the right size etc very secretly. I had mentioned I would like one a couple of years ago but wasn't expecting it!

Interesting to hear it was invented in the 60s - my grandmother has an eternity ring, or so I thought, given to her by my grandfather on the birth of their first son (notably, not the birth of their first child, a girl...), in 1956.

People have always given and exchanged rings.

But the eternity ring "tradition" is a cynical marketing exercise.

It's way older than the 1960s.

Sassy if you want a ring then tell him, it's your birthday and a special one at that. Any reason he has never bought you any jewelry? As for wanting an engagement ring that's a whole other thread but after 7 years and a DC together and with you wanting more , I'd be asking questions.

You find me a reference to an eternity ring before 1960.........

EttaJ he was married before and taken to the cleaners so he's not so keen on getting married again... And he never got me jewellery before because he says he never knows what I'd like. I'm well aware that if I'd asked for jewellery before, he would've got me some but i would have to pick it out myself!! I never asked as I was always hoping he'd surprise me. After 7 years I now know he will never surprise me with jewellery or a ring. Lol!

All traditions started somewhere, all were new once.

Dog with a bone.

I hate to sound mean...

You seem to be relishing it actually.