MN is a weird place

[fatmomma99]

I've commented on threads and had to then find a few weeks or months later a thread on a similar theme with every poster agreeing with what I'd said on the original thread (where were you all when I got my biscuits???)

It's not a criticism, but I'm stunned by how many posters on here are not parents. AND COMPLAIN about the parent bias. Posts like "this is discriminating against people who haven't had children". Dur, it's a parenting website. Again, everyone is welcome, and I have no issues with people who aren't parents. But to me it's like 'if you want to play in the playground with the big kids, don't complain about the big kids'. I'm not saying anyone who is a parent is bigger or better than anyone on here who doesn't have children, but this is a website set up for PARENTS AND CARERS (and there was this amazing thread once by this woman who was at university and having a hard time with her flatmate and she said she was on here because her mum was a MN-er). I honestly don't care if your on here and a mum/not a mum, black/white/any colour, male/female/any gender, uk/anywhere else. I LOVE that what the internet gives us is a blurring of all of those and to me, everyone is welcome and appreciated for what they bring to the table. But I honestly don't understand someone posting on this site saying "I'm not a mum and I don't use the internet, how dare you discriminate against me!"

And some threads are very, very odd. Had a glorious weekend. Was intending to sort garden, but it's been raining so been on MN for 2 solid days. Sometimes threads go very, very odd.

And yet, I love it. I put up a post yesterday, had some fab advice and it sorted my problem - job done. Thank you MN

And it makes me laugh.

And cry.

And then laugh again. And then cry again.

And it's ALL so far away from RL.

It's an odd place.

But I feel at home here. Maybe that makes me odd!

I always thought the biscuit gets posted because it looks like an arsehole!

You're attitude sucks, op. It also seems you're suggesting parents who don't go to their kids sporting events should have had abortions. Nice.

I've no intention of going to my kids sporting events and I don't play with them. You say that doesn't bother me. It's just your opinion.

"I always thought the biscuit gets posted because it looks like an arsehole!"

Yes OP MN can be a weird place...

Plenty of posters don't "know" what the biscuit means.

Since there's no official listing of what it means, maybe we should say that there are differing opinions on what a biscuit means.

The things you say in your posts don't mesh with your professions of being welcoming to everyone.

Particularly AIBU, as weird goes.
I don't rate people who start threads there or reply to them.
Ahem

It's your tone OP.

HTH.

I think the OP's rants come across as heartfelt. It is very frustrating if you post something and get a) ignored or b) flamed and then someone else makes the very same point and there's all this fawning and a whole slew of "What QueenBee said" posts.

I agree that the biscuit thing is overused and is a subtle (or not so subtle!) way of indicating that the subject is not approved . It's usually if anyone dares to post anything that's not the "party" line on benefits or disability or immigration - then out comes the biscuit. It's lazy and rude.

I think the biscuit looks like my cat's bum.

But anyhow, Mumsnet is weird sometimes, the trolls who have too much time on their hands and a desperate need for attention, they both intrigue and irritate me. But mumsnet is also wonderful, it's simply a case of sifting out the bad bits. I like it here.

It's not a criticism, but I'm stunned by how many posters on here are not parents. AND COMPLAIN about the parent bias. Posts like "this is discriminating against people who haven't had children". Dur, it's a parenting website.

Just because you preface your comment with "it's not a criticism" doesn't mean that what you've written isn't a criticism of non-parents on here.

Firstly, we're not a homogenous bunch of identical people with identical opinions as you imply.

Secondly, I am well aware it is a "parenting" site (really no need for the patronising "dur") but a huge number of topics have nothing to do with children. Non parents have involvement with children as teachers, aunts/uncles, godparents, friends of friends with children etc.

Thirdly, your point about them complaining about bias against them being out of order because it is a parenting site is ridiculous. If someone is behaving badly and (for example) demanding Christmas off ahead of everyone else because they have children that deserves to be called out.

Yes it's you op.

I've seen you on quite a few threads make judgemental/sneering/patronising comments and starting an AIBU thread to call MNers "weird" demonstrates your attitude nicely.

Maybe you could bear in mind that not everyone thinks like you but that's ok. It's allowed

I remember a poster admitting they thought the was a tit which seemed quite apt

It's great if a poster gets pulled up on their rude or inappropriate comment but I hate the way on some threads when lots of posters pile on to disagree with one poster and end up ripping that person to shreds, each one being more nasty and personal. They seem to get pleasure in ganging up on one poster and forget there's a real person on the receiving end of all the abuse.

The crying and laughing and crying thing is odd.
Its just a chat board.

Does it depend on the topic? Atmospheres vary between them. Then again, I'm not a parent so I suppose you think I should just keep quiet. You made a big deal of saying that non-parents are welcome, but it didn't come across as sincere.

I would say that there are more childless women on MN than there are fathers so it's more of a women's forum than a parenting forum. Plenty of the threads have nothing to do with parenting.

There are also some very sensitive people here - anything you say offends them and I think some of them aren't used to frank discussions on anything.

There was an AIBU thread a couple of weeks ago in which the OP was clearly being unreasonable. And people said so. Then on comes someone saying OP has MH issues, and how nasty everyone is, and then a swarm of henchmen arrive and berate everyone for being mean to OP, and then MN ask after OP... Now that was weird and I've seen it several times now. How is the ordinary poster supposed to know exactly who has MH issues and is untouchable? I take everyone at face (or rather no face at all since it's the internet) and unless you're in this special biscuity clique how on earth do you know who has to be handled with kid gloves or who posts for kicks or who is above reproach? Beats me.

I don't want to sit and watch mine play minecraft for an hour - I don't value them any less

I had 5 mc getting my girls but it doesn't make them more special than other kids

Your tone may be the issue op - and your general emotional state!

There is a difference between saying someone is unreasonable and calling ops' names or putting them down.
Having said that sometimes ops seem to be joking. But then they're not really. Or like to put down others but can't take it.
If you do have MH issues, perhaps MN (and other fora) are not the best place to be around. Unless you're upfront about your issues.
Pps tend to respond well to genuine and friendly people. Not so much to openly antagonistic or passive aggressive people.

Having tears pouring down your face, dying laughing, shaking with rage and spitting tea on your keyboard in shock are all fairly commonplace emotions on MN

When I first joined, an older poster told me you need to develop a thick rhino hide on here..excellent advice.

I noticed that too.