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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Random woman paid for customers coffee

234 replies

TheoriginalLEM · 07/06/2016 17:27

A gentleman came into the cafe and ordered a latte. He was a bit doddery and scruffy and was counting his money from money bags (checking he had enough i think). another customer paid for his coffee when she settled her bill for no reason.

AIBU to think this was patronising and embarrassing for the man? Maybe he just doesnt carry much cash but is perfectly able to pay for his own coffee Hmm

OP posts:
LineyReborn · 07/06/2016 17:39

It was an unsuspended coffee.

MidnightVelvetthe5th · 07/06/2016 17:40

I call reverse! OP was the man!!! Grin Grin

Asprilla11 · 07/06/2016 17:40

Did she then go to the newspapers and sell her story about what a good human being she was?

No?

Well it was just a nice thing to do then Smile

lurkingfromhome · 07/06/2016 17:40

Dear god, nothing like a bit of sucking the joy out of life, eh? Isn't there enough shit in the world to be really cross about never mind going looking for more? Hmm

Original poster
TheoriginalLEM · 07/06/2016 17:41

I might be a bit butch midnight but not a man, no!

OP posts:
MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 07/06/2016 17:42

I thought "Random Acts of Kindness" and "Pay It Forward" were things nowadays.

EveOnline2016 · 07/06/2016 17:42

it was a coffee, not an all inclusive break to the Maldives.

I love random acts of kindness.

oldlaundbooth · 07/06/2016 17:43

Thanks Roobix Brew

Waltermittythesequel · 07/06/2016 17:43

Fuck sake.

She dared to try and do something nice?

Why wasn't she arrested?

OurBlanche · 07/06/2016 17:46

Shit! Really, Milk ? Recognised things with TWO bloody names fer crissakes.

That does it... no more Mrs Nice Customer Stood Behind You In the Queue for me!!! Grin

meowli · 07/06/2016 17:47

Yeah - she should have huffed and puffed at him holding up the queue and said hurry up you doddery scruffy fool.

Grin This made me laugh out loud!

I think it was a nice thing for her to do, as well.

Kr1stina · 07/06/2016 17:48

YABU

AugustaFinkNottle · 07/06/2016 17:49

How do you get worked up enough about this to start a thread?

TheWeeBabySeamus1 · 07/06/2016 17:51

She sounds like a right bitch. Hope someone pays for her coffee one day, that'll teach her. Wink

MidnightVelvetthe5th · 07/06/2016 17:51

LEM Grin

mrsbates070707 · 07/06/2016 17:51

Definitely being unreasonable. It may have had nothing to do with his appearance, it may well have just been a RAOK. Either way I don't understand why it would provoke such a negative reaction.

AristotleTheGreat · 07/06/2016 17:52

Agree with Milk.

I'm not sure why it HAS TO be an PA act to show that man he didn't have enough money/she was better than him or whatever else.

I like though the fact the OP did put a judgement on the man. That he didn't have a lot of money therefore in some ways, it was 'charity' and would make him uneasy... I'm wondering LEM if your reaction would have been the same if said man had been well dressed and paying by card.

Original poster
TheoriginalLEM · 07/06/2016 17:52

ok. sorry but it was a reverse. Not trying to show off. never done anything like this. The guy looked like he might have a bit of dementia and he reminded me of my dad. But no sooner i left the shop i thought oh no. the poor guy will be mortified and think "that lady thinks im a tramp". then i thought id ask here but then i worried that people would think i was showing off.

now i feel a bit of a wally :(

OP posts:
Ratty667 · 07/06/2016 17:54

A teenager got on the bus a while ago, he didn't have enough to pay, two of us stood up to pay his fair.
In the end the bus driver let him on for free.
Random acts of kindness are nice, I would have happily paid his fair, hopefully one day if my child was stuck, someone would help them.

lurkingfromhome · 07/06/2016 17:55

That was a bit of a waste of everyone's time then ...

SuckingEggs · 07/06/2016 17:55

LEM, I did wonder! Grin

Stop blooming worrying

ShatnersBassoon · 07/06/2016 17:56

Oh bloody hell! Twice in a week I've walked into a Mumsnet trap! I'm losing it.

Iknownuffink · 07/06/2016 17:57

A little bit of kindness can go a long way.

I smile and say hello to random strangers.

magicstar1 · 07/06/2016 17:57

Sometimes it's just nice to do something like that. I was in a Subway sandwich bar once and an old woman came in. She was a bit confused and wanted tea and toast, so I brought her around the corner to a cafe, ordered and paid for tea and toast. Maybe I should be chastised too..

Mrsfrumble · 07/06/2016 17:57

Well if he did have the money, he could always have "paid it forward" and bought a coffee for the next customer.

I think it's lovely. Last summer, after a long hot morning at the park I took my 2 preschoolers for an ice cream in a posh cafe on the ground floor of a big office tower. For some reason, there were separate queues for ordering ice cream and paying, and the queue for the till was massive. Both DCs were tired; the oldest was whining and the little one started howling. The other customers in their smart suits were staring, I was stressed and embarassed but couldn't leave without paying as we already had the ice cream. Then a woman passed me on her way out and told me she'd payed for us so we could get the heck outta there.

I certainly didn't feel patronized! I could've kissed her! In short, I'm all for strangers performing random acts of kindness.