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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

You AIBU Lot!!

162 replies

Moxxygirl · 03/06/2016 16:46

I must admit as an older mom with grown up kids, I love reading the AIBU posts!!
Thank God my kids were raised 30+ years ago, when us moms were not so navel watching, agonising, worrying about their food, school progress, friendships.
WE were the adults - WE made the rules ( without a huge amount of negotiation !) and our kids ran free, didn't worry about pouting on FB, and had a brilliant childhood.
We used to go to the neighbours for a drink and wire the baby alarm through the window so we could here if one of them cried.
We went to holiday camps and left them in the chalets with a babysitting service that flew past on a bike listening for crying babies and flawed it up in the car if one was crying in your chalet.
Nowadays I'm sure SS would have taken them all off us.
And yes they grew up to all hold very responsible jobs in Police and Education.
I actually feel a bit sorry for you moms nowadays.
Your thoughts??

OP posts:
Original poster
Moxxygirl · 03/06/2016 17:04

I apologise if I sound patronising I can assure you I don't intend to be !

OP posts:
Queenbean · 03/06/2016 17:05

Unless you're writing this for one of those shit lists of 20 REASONS LIFE WAS BETTER BACK IN THE OLD DAYS YOULL NEVER BELIEVE NUMBER 18!!!!

Because they are the shitsville of shit

Buzzardbird · 03/06/2016 17:06

The good old days of the 70's were pretty shit for a lot of children.

Original poster
Moxxygirl · 03/06/2016 17:07

And looking at the News the good new days are pretty shit for quite a few kids today too.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 03/06/2016 17:07

Well you may not mean to sound patronising but...

As I rule I'd say Go with your gut instinct, kids are much stronger and more resilient than they are given credit for.

I feel like Mary Poppins has arrived to educate us all Grin

glasgowlass · 03/06/2016 17:08

My thoughts?
You sound like an arse. HTH.

TheCrumpettyTree · 03/06/2016 17:08

Is this a fb meme?

iwouldgoouttonight · 03/06/2016 17:09

I also take huge offence at that they miss out on a huge amount of their children's lives as they are not prepared to sacrifice possessions for time

My MIL says the same thing to me and can't get it into her head that if I didn't work we wouldn't be able to afford to pay the bills or buy food. I'd love to be able to 'sacrifice a few possessions' to spend more time with my kids. I'm not going to sacrifice their food or warmth though.

molyholy · 03/06/2016 17:09

Well I am 38 amd there is no way on this earth my parens would have pissed off to the pub and left us kids in a chalet with a random stranger barely looking after us!! I love treating my 7 yo dd as her own person and I respect her.

You sound like a rather condescending, smug, a-hole.

FourEyesGood · 03/06/2016 17:11

Patronising crap. And there's no way I could afford to not work, because those houses that you baby boomers bought for £8000 are now £200,000 (and more).

BillSykesDog · 03/06/2016 17:12

I think you should stop cutting and pasting crappy memes of Facebook and passing them off as your own. Seen that before, doesn't get any less irritating.

Tanito279 · 03/06/2016 17:12

This made me Grin
Did Jimmy Saville work at the holiday camp?

usual · 03/06/2016 17:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AliceThrewTheFookingGlass · 03/06/2016 17:12

You're not only patronising but hypocritical too.

We used to go to the neighbours for a drink and wire the baby alarm through the window so we could here if one of them cried.
We went to holiday camps and left them in the chalets with a babysitting service that flew past on a bike listening for crying babies and flawed it up in the car if one was crying in your chalet.

Then you say

but feel that they miss out on a huge amount of their children's lives as they are not prepared to sacrifice possessions for time

So kind of like how you wasn't prepared to sacrifice nights out on holiday or drinks round next door for time with your children? Got it.

leelu66 · 03/06/2016 17:14

As a rule I'd say Go with your gut instinct, kids are much stronger and more resilient than they are given credit for.

I don't know what this means 😩

TooGood2BeFalse · 03/06/2016 17:15

Navel watching? I don't consider thinking carefully and trying my absolute hardest to raise my child counts as staring at my own navel. If anything, I am pretty much bottom of the priority list, and while I make sure I am happy and healthy, I consider that to be the the right thing considering I actively chose to have children. I am 28, not sure how old your kids are now, but my parents were actively involved in all aspects of our lives, protective, safety conscious and not that different to how I parent today. Your tone is a tad bizarre and the basic essence seems to be 'Hi all!You're nuts and me and mine raised our children in a superior manner to you'.

Which,you know, appears somewhat more akin to 'navel watching' to me Grin

Teresalosingtheirleaves · 03/06/2016 17:16

The "good new days" are available all day everyday now.
Back in the good old days 4 channels didn't post news all day, certainly little England wouldn't of known much about what parents thought was a good punishment for a little boy, so we were none the wiser. I think it's bullshit that the good ole days were safer, we are just more aware now, I for one am more inclined to listen if my dc are unhappy instead of pissing off next door for a fag and babycham. Sorry but yubu.

witsender · 03/06/2016 17:16

I'm bewildered, in the main because I can't decipher much of your message.

Onlyicanclean10 · 03/06/2016 17:17

I am 50 and my parents certainly didn't piss off to the pub either and leave us with a random babysitter.

Neither would I have dreamed of doing such to mine in the 80s/90s.

It's utter bollocks to spout that there were no parenting 'rules' in the old days either thinking. In the 50s it was all leave to cry and fresh air in all weathers in the pram.

Sensible parents pick and choose what suits their family set up.

Child abuse, cruelty, neglect etc are as Rife today as they were In the past because people Don't change.

witsender · 03/06/2016 17:17

And tbh, much of what you offer as examples sound like neglectful parenting, regardless of era.

thecatfromjapan · 03/06/2016 17:18

Since it's a bun-fight am I permitted to say that reading the OP is akin to how I imagine it would be watching a donkey doing needlework?

I liked 'navel watching' quite a bit, too.

Alwayschanging1 · 03/06/2016 17:19

No doubt about it - you were superior to us in every way.
Give yourself a pat on the back.
Well done you.

Onlyicanclean10 · 03/06/2016 17:20

And if you didn't worry about their food, school progress and friendships then you were pretty crap parents weren't you.

LaserShark · 03/06/2016 17:20

The only thing I think you have a point about is the pouting on social media one. I do worry about kids on social media when they use it inappropriately or unsafely - there are loads of problems with cyber bullying and sexting amongst teens which cause a lot of heartache. Other than that, I don't particularly aspire to being the kind of parent who leaves babies in holiday chalets while I go out drinking.

Being able to google everything to do with parenting - yes, it can cause a certain amount of angst and worry at times. But it's also an invaluable resource and I have found so many great tips, sources of support and helpful advice and reassurance online so there are pros and cons.

All the kids near me play out. It's a myth that children aren't allowed out of doors anymore.

LolBeansandSalad · 03/06/2016 17:20

Your posts are just missing the 'share if you're proud to be an old fashioned supermom' rubbish at the end