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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to pull out from this nightmare camping trip?

389 replies

SparkleSoiree · 31/05/2016 15:56

So, camping is not, has never been and, now I can say, will never be my thing.

People love it, I get that. Kids and husbands I think mostly...I DONT GET IT.

We are booked to go camping with DH's cousin and his family in August. I'm more of a city break, lovely hotel person myself but DH and DD were really keen to go relive his scouting days and not wanting to be a party pooper I decided to throw myself in there too to show willing and that basically I can do anything I put my mind to. Turns out I'm more of a panderedto woman than superwoman!

We did a trial on the weekend in the garden with the new tent and kit DH bought. Seriously, it was like watching him unwrap his presents on christmas morning. His face was constantly smiling, sharing his joy with DD who loved it just as much. I offered some help occasionally but could not get into the spirit of it at all. He even put up little fairy lights around the rope thingies to add a little bit of glam for me Biscuit .

It was a disaster for me, I got the total of 1hr 5 mins kip between 11pm and 8am, was in a seriously bad mood in the morning and did not see the fun side of it at all. Seven nights I've booked myself in for and if I had to spend 7 consecutive nights with minimal sleep I'd be driving myself home by the end of day 2! I cannot function without my sleep, I get really grumpy and moody and a desire to be on my own. I certainly couldn't think about a day trip out after spending 10 mins trying to get up off a bloody airbed and that's before I've even thought about getting dressed!

I'm considering options, one of which is not going at all and allowing DH to spend the week with his family and DD. Upside is that I would get a week to myself as my other DD is away abroad at the same time.

Another is to check into a hotel close by and swing in by each morning with some lovely breakfast items for them all and spend the day with them. Upside is there will be a lovely bathroom in the hotel, just for me, a cosy bed, a bar under cover and I won't have to make my bed in the morning because some lovely person will do it for me. More my idea of relaxation.

Other option is to borrow our friend's caravan (she has offered it in my hour of need!) and add a caravan pitch to our booking. That way we have a tent and a caravan. I could cope with a caravan - I think.

Out of those I think I prefer the first one, so AIBU to pull out and spend a week on my own doing my own thing and forgetting I'm a 44yr old mum of 3, wife to 1 and taxi driver to all?

OP posts:
whattheseithakasmean · 01/06/2016 13:26

I think camping is marmite - I love it, DH hates it.

Just to get the princesses pearl clutching, I frequently wild camp in Scotland, so no running water, drinking from streams and field poo kit at the ready (ie little trowel to bury poo). I love it.

expatinscotland · 01/06/2016 13:28

A childfree week at home?! This is a no-brainer. Send them off to camp.

Sprink · 01/06/2016 13:36

This comes across as really self absorbed and lacking in awareness

No, it really doesn't. Self-absorbed would be insisting her husband and daughter didn't camp but went somewhere she wanted instead.

And someone lacking in awareness wouldn't have posted with the humour and second thoughts about wanting to make her husband happy by joining in.

This is just someone who tried it (albeit briefly), didn't like it, and doesn't want to do it. Some people call that knowing your own mind.

As for 'swanning in'...that gives the impression that the others there would somehow be camping against their will and be resentful of her staying elsewhere. If everyone's staying in preferred accommodation (whether it's tent or luxury hotel) and they get to spend time together, I can't see any animosity building. Good grief.

Topseyt · 01/06/2016 13:38

I loathe camping as I said in my previous post.

If that makes me princessy, weak and precious in the eyes of some then so be it. Their problem rather than mine and I couldn't give a flying fuck.

FWIW, I am not of the "shoes off in the house" persuasion.

petitpois55 · 01/06/2016 13:44

Think we'll have to agree to disagree Sprink

MumOnACornishFarm · 01/06/2016 13:44

Camping is very much a marmite thing. A bit like a cruise is. Personally I can't see that the rest of the group would have a great time if the OP was very obviously deeply uncomfortable and sleep deprived. Where's the fun in that? In my mind it always seems better to compromise to accommodate people in a situation like this one. But just because the OP dislikes camping, this doesn't make her "princessy" or "precious." Personally I would take a damp tent over a swanky hotel any day, but that wouldn't automatically make me whatever the opposite of princessy is. I do not understand why we can't all have our different preferences without people having a poke at us for them.

SusanneLinder · 01/06/2016 13:45

My DH loved camping and I thought I would hate it. We tried our new tent in the garden and I went in after two hours! Problem was our sleep system.
Went for a weekend with new mattress and it was fabulous. In fact we booked an extra two days. I refuse to rough it and have leccy hookup, telly and my straighteners.
Having said that, if you truly hate it, dont go! A couple were in next tent to us on one camping trip and obviously hated it. Woke us up several times with shouting, moaning and arguing .Im sure you wouldnt do that OP but just making the point that its not worth going if you arent happy.

Sprink · 01/06/2016 13:54

Think we'll have to agree to disagree Sprink

No, no, petitpois, that won't do. Let's keep arguing until one of us changes the other's opinion, or we start calling each other names and someone reports the other.

I've got an hour to kill. Wink

MistressDeeCee · 01/06/2016 14:00

Id do the caravan or hotel. The thought of camping makes me want to cry buckets

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 01/06/2016 14:18

But just because the OP dislikes camping, this doesn't make her "princessy" or "precious"

Did anyone actually say that? If the OP had said, AIBU to hate camping? Most people would say YANBU.

It might have been the booking a hotel nearby and swinging by with croissants and juice/being a pandered-to woman and all the rest of it that might have sounded a bit over the top.

Just not liking camping? Nowt wrong with that.

If that makes me princessy, weak and precious in the eyes of some then so be it. Their problem rather than mine and I couldn't give a flying fuck.

Didn't see these comments either.

I think people who love camping don't iron things runs Grin

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 01/06/2016 14:18

Sprink Grin

Pipbin · 01/06/2016 14:32

Did anyone actually say that?

Yes they did. Someone up thread said that to stay in a hotel next to the campsite was a bit princessy.

rainbowstardrops · 01/06/2016 14:32

I'd go for the caravan option. Way better than camping! That way you're with your family but have some sort of normality too

Pipbin · 01/06/2016 14:33

Quote:
BertrandRussell Tue 31-May-16 16:11:03

I think staying at home is fine- maybe do a couple of day trips to visit? The hotel sounds a bit princessy. The caravan is a good option too.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 01/06/2016 14:39

Yes they did. Someone up thread said that to stay in a hotel next to the campsite was a bit princessy

That's my point. It was the hotel thing and the other bits that some posters though was a bit much.

I can't see that anyone said that simply not liking camping is 'princessy' (awful word).

BertrandRussell · 01/06/2016 14:50

If you actually read my post, I said that not liking camping was fine and staying at home was fine.

But why let the facts get in the way of a good story.........

Pipbin · 01/06/2016 14:52

But you did also say that The hotel sounds a bit princessy.

BertrandRussell · 01/06/2016 14:57

I know I did. It does.

I did not, as you suggest, say that not liking camping makes her "princessy". But as I said, don't let the facts.etc etc etc.................

MissMargie · 01/06/2016 15:07

'Why couldn't you sleep?'

Seems a stupid question to me...
Because you are in very strange surroundings compRed to normal
Because you can hear every movement and fart from every animal , neighbouring tent etc
Because it's cold and damp
Because getting up for a pee means staggering over various people, guy ropes, nettle beds etc
Because the sun is up at 4 am
Because you Re disturbed by those around you
Because you can't just make a cup of tea, nip to the bathroom for a couple of headache pills if you can't sleep
Etc etc

Pipbin · 01/06/2016 15:11

I said; Someone up thread said that to stay in a hotel next to the campsite was a bit princessy.

But don't let the facts etc........

BertrandRussell · 01/06/2016 15:14

But you were responding to a poster asking whether anyone had said that not liking camping made you............ oh, I give up.

Pipbin · 01/06/2016 15:17

My apologies Bertrand. I read it that no one had said that any of it was princessy, not just disliking camping.

Lovecat · 01/06/2016 15:32

DH must be an ickle princess then, as that's his preferred option, he HATES camping. We've just been to a festival which was half an hour from home. He drove back every night to sleep in his own bed and use his own shower, while we stayed onsite. Which was a shame because he missed out on the post-festival campsite drinks and chat.

I do wish he'd change his mind, because DD and I love camping and would love his company, but at 51 years of age I think he knows what he likes and isn't suddenly about to have some great epiphany...

So while I sympathise with your DH and DD, OP, I do see where you're coming from and if it's not for you, it's not for you. Have fun whatever you do :)

JS06 · 01/06/2016 15:52

Ah, I feel for you! After a miserable trial run I can see how the prospect of a 7 nighter is alarming.

If you're able to summon up the drive or energy I would love for you to find out about the great aspects of camping. I'm no natural camper, like you preferring a bit more luxury on my breaks but it's certainly a wonderfully different way of spending time in the open air with those you love and are comfortable with. I have braved tents a few times, have enjoyed it and have even won a few competitions with my camping tips. The whole family think this is hilarious as I am the one to walk into a hanging lantern in the tent and cover my hair with molten wax. I'm the one to march off to the shower block to get there before the hoardes, get showered and hair washed, only to find I've not brought a towel. Arrrgggh.

What about piquing your interest via pinterest and seeing what might take your fancy. Anything you can do to make it more comfy for yourself would be great and certainly getting enough sleep is going to be key for you.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Katherine2626 · 01/06/2016 15:55

Go for the hotel - you are not forced to enjoy camping, and frankly if I can't be as comfortable as I am at home I don't wanna go anywhere! Think of the blissful bed, the hot showers, the peace, the mini bar, the croissants you can take along when you breeze in each morning, fresh and clean and well rested. A hotel night will make you an asset the next day - look at it as a bonus for your family. Anyone who likes camping needs a straight jacket - and yes, I have tried it.

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