AIBU to pull out from this nightmare camping trip?

[SparkleSoiree]

So, camping is not, has never been and, now I can say, will never be my thing.

People love it, I get that. Kids and husbands I think mostly...I DONT GET IT.

We are booked to go camping with DH's cousin and his family in August. I'm more of a city break, lovely hotel person myself but DH and DD were really keen to go relive his scouting days and not wanting to be a party pooper I decided to throw myself in there too to show willing and that basically I can do anything I put my mind to. Turns out I'm more of a panderedto woman than superwoman!

We did a trial on the weekend in the garden with the new tent and kit DH bought. Seriously, it was like watching him unwrap his presents on christmas morning. His face was constantly smiling, sharing his joy with DD who loved it just as much. I offered some help occasionally but could not get into the spirit of it at all. He even put up little fairy lights around the rope thingies to add a little bit of glam for me .

It was a disaster for me, I got the total of 1hr 5 mins kip between 11pm and 8am, was in a seriously bad mood in the morning and did not see the fun side of it at all. Seven nights I've booked myself in for and if I had to spend 7 consecutive nights with minimal sleep I'd be driving myself home by the end of day 2! I cannot function without my sleep, I get really grumpy and moody and a desire to be on my own. I certainly couldn't think about a day trip out after spending 10 mins trying to get up off a bloody airbed and that's before I've even thought about getting dressed!

I'm considering options, one of which is not going at all and allowing DH to spend the week with his family and DD. Upside is that I would get a week to myself as my other DD is away abroad at the same time.

Another is to check into a hotel close by and swing in by each morning with some lovely breakfast items for them all and spend the day with them. Upside is there will be a lovely bathroom in the hotel, just for me, a cosy bed, a bar under cover and I won't have to make my bed in the morning because some lovely person will do it for me. More my idea of relaxation.

Other option is to borrow our friend's caravan (she has offered it in my hour of need!) and add a caravan pitch to our booking. That way we have a tent and a caravan. I could cope with a caravan - I think.

Out of those I think I prefer the first one, so AIBU to pull out and spend a week on my own doing my own thing and forgetting I'm a 44yr old mum of 3, wife to 1 and taxi driver to all?

Either don't go and let them have some bonding time with his family (winner winner chicken dinner)

Or

Sort out the sleeping situation so it's comfy. 2 pillows. 4 inch thick memory foam mattress topper (about £40 from Amazon). Can be folded/rolled enough to get in car and is the BEST camping nights sleep ever.

I love camping.....in my head. In my head the weather is always lovely, the air bed is just as comfy as my bed at home, the loos are pristine and cooking etc is a fun family activity.

In reality it pisses it down, I get no sleep, the loos are pretty grim and the showers frankly disgusting. Cooking a meal is an epic and the kids spend all week bickering just as they would at home but there is nowhere to seperate them and nothing to distract them.

I tried many many times to love it, so I have given it a go, but its not for me. Go for the caravan option if you feel you really must attend or stay at home. I think the hotel option will make you look very up yourself in front of DHs family.

I'm not a great camper, but I love festivals and over the years have perfected the art of camping to suit my needs.

We have separate, single air beds which are guaranteed not to deflate (not cheap, but my previous airbed decided to pop at 3am!) - this also means we dont both fall into the middle. We take pillows, feather duvet and various blankets to keep warm (even though its always mid summer).

We invested in decent camping chairs, table and LED light as well as a mammoth well insulated cool box.

Most importantly is the tent. Ours is quick erect - not pop up (so our arguments - every time!) are kept to a minimum and you can stand throughout it. We have a 6 man for the two of us - excessive but necessary for festivals!

We have good walking shoes and wellies, always take gaffer tape and most importantly have the silicon earplugs and eyemasks (so that you can sleep beyond sunrise).

The only thing we haven't conquered is the 30 degree temperatures when we have that one day of sunshine - this generally happens at 4:30am. Other friends use foil blankets either between the inner and outer tent or on the outer tent - we have tried but have failed to make this work!!! The watersprays and fans help as do the evian sprays you can get in boots, but its momentary rather than a long term solution!!!

Try and 'glamp' as much as you can... what makes sleeping at home comfortable? Take what you can to make it a home away from home. Our best festivals are the ones where we invest in a hotel!!!

Air beds are useless... Get a good quality camp bed, and one of the 1" thick self inflating camping mattresses. Add the fluffiest sleeping bag you can find and a couple of nice pillows and you'll be far more comfy, I always had a horrible nights sleep before I swapped to this set up. if you have a drink or two before bedtime this will also help

And of course there were no shower blocks...so skinny dipping in open water...it works!

I loathe, I mean LOATHE, camping.

It's just my idea of hell. I have been twice. Stayed each time for one night only.

DH is a bit like yours OP. He gets very excited. Me, I just find it awful.

Sleeping arrangements, toliet/ shower arrangements. Just hideous.

Both times we have been, we booked ( against my wishes ) for 3 nights. First time we went I bailed out after the first night. Second time was last year. We took two cars which DH wasn't pleased about but after one night, I left the DC with him and fucked off home.

DH has said that it's a waste of time going with me and he doesn't want me to go with him again. Face bothered. Not at all

In your shoes, I would 100 percent stay in the hotel. No questions asked.

Mouikey gives good camping advice. Always got for a tent rated for 3x the number of people it needs to sleep :-)

The only way to escape the boiling heat Mouikey is to have a front door that opens up and has poles so you get a big big of shade. The. Drag your blanket out here and sleep in the shade but outside.

I used to enjoy camping, until a few years ago. Too many campsites pack people in. Far too close together. Too many campers being noisy all night (snoring, throwing up and arguing!). Yes, that was a horror camp site!
Some don't get the point of it. They bring their windbreaks and make a little fortress, bring their TV!
I've found another way to camp. By myself, in the wilds with a bivvy bag.
No noise, no trouble. Bliss!

I'd be tempted to go for the hotel option, although a week of peace at home also holds some attraction.

I once reluctantly agreed to try camping for a long weekend with DH and my DD3. I loathed it more than I can say. I would rather extract my own teeth than ever try it again.

If camping was the only holiday on offer it would not persuade me. I would stay at home. I really would rather have no holiday at all.

Why, when I have all of my creature comforts at home, would I then want to go and try to sleep in the middle of a field?

I also found it very disconcerting to arrive at our holiday destination and then have to actually build our accommodation ourselves.

So, I am totally with you, OP. I don't "get" camping either. It just isn't for me. My DDs all tried it with guides and said it wasn't for them either. DH has given up with us.

I'm not a fan either, but have been on three camping holidays with the family. The sleep and bathrooms were actually fine for what they were, but they will never beat a hotel. I would not want to go again, but would go if DDs did, as I do think it's a problem that it's mainly the mums who don't want to go. I think it does make women seem princessy and weak. I have tendencies towards five star hotels and luxury, but I try not to show it, as I want my DDs to be able to rough it a bit. I don't want camping etc to be regarded as a man/daddy thing, as I think it sends DDs the wrong message.

I suspect many people who hate camping are also of the "shoes-off" brigade.
It's a class thing.

I take zopiclone every night when camping. That way I sleep well. Also fnd a good air-bed and warm layers of clothes help, and a system in the tent to keep it all organised. Thermal leggings and long sleeve top under PJS, slip on camp shoes.

IMO you should go along and make the best of it. Your DD will be so upset if you pull out and you'll spoil it for them. Imagine if you booked a nice hotel holiday and your DH refused to stay in the room with you?

Oh and I'm 'shoes off' at home. In a tent I just leave them at the entrance.

I don't love camping but I don't hate it either. There's something magical about waking up in a field with the sun shining through the dew on the ceiling.

If UK us too cold and wet, try it abroad somewhere like south of France or Corsica.

Airbeds are crap. The deflation isn't due to leaking: it's the cold making the air shrink. You can insulate an airbed from the ground, which helps but by then you may as well bring a couple of self-inflatting matts. Two of those I will find genuinely comfortable. I don't mind sleeping on the ground but others may prefer a camp bed under the matts.

I take two buckets. One sits full of water. Good for rinsing hands quickly. The other is for peeing in at night. Obviously, everyone's tolerance on that sort of thing will vary.

I don't understand the idea that disliking camping makes you princessy and weak. Isn't it just a dislike? It's a holiday and I want to relax, goodness knows I work hard all the time and camping is WAY too much like hard work practically as well as the sleep and toilet issue.

If you have the cash I'd go for option 2!!! Sounds fab.

For Fucks sake , what utter bilge to suggest a dislike of camping stems from a 'class thing' and is 'princessy and weak' if a woman chooses not to do it .

There's some bollocks written here at times.

OP, why aren't the other two children camping? (Totally nosy.)

Reminds me of my poor SIL who agreed to a camping trip to Snowdonia in spring (!!!!) Having never been camping before, and being far more familiar with the heat of southern Turkey thank the dank of my beloved homeland. Bless her, it did not go well.
Scrap camping. Life is too short to do things you really, really don't want to do and almost certainly will not enjoy. I personally would feel a bit silly going off to a hotel each night, so I think the caravan sounds like the perfect compromise.
Bless your husband for the token fairy lights though

I'd stay at home. I think disappearing to a hotel then turning up with breakfast would spoil the atmosphere of the holiday for everyone.

Sprink one daughter is off to Portugal for a week with another family member, having completed her D of E at that point and my eldest hates camping!!

Everyone's doing their thing except me it would seem and I'm not sure I feel comfortable with going along to keep others happy when I see it written down in this way.

I've been rofl-ing at the 'princessy' thing throughout. You couldn't get any woman less princessy than me - I just hate camping.

Airbeds
Sleeping bags
Cold
Rain
Bugs
Damp clothing
Not being able to stand up properly
Communal toilets/showers
and as for tent sex - really? With only a thin sheet of nylon between us and DD and us and the rest of the world? Not a fucking chance!