Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to pull out from this nightmare camping trip?

389 replies

SparkleSoiree · 31/05/2016 15:56

So, camping is not, has never been and, now I can say, will never be my thing.

People love it, I get that. Kids and husbands I think mostly...I DONT GET IT.

We are booked to go camping with DH's cousin and his family in August. I'm more of a city break, lovely hotel person myself but DH and DD were really keen to go relive his scouting days and not wanting to be a party pooper I decided to throw myself in there too to show willing and that basically I can do anything I put my mind to. Turns out I'm more of a panderedto woman than superwoman!

We did a trial on the weekend in the garden with the new tent and kit DH bought. Seriously, it was like watching him unwrap his presents on christmas morning. His face was constantly smiling, sharing his joy with DD who loved it just as much. I offered some help occasionally but could not get into the spirit of it at all. He even put up little fairy lights around the rope thingies to add a little bit of glam for me Biscuit .

It was a disaster for me, I got the total of 1hr 5 mins kip between 11pm and 8am, was in a seriously bad mood in the morning and did not see the fun side of it at all. Seven nights I've booked myself in for and if I had to spend 7 consecutive nights with minimal sleep I'd be driving myself home by the end of day 2! I cannot function without my sleep, I get really grumpy and moody and a desire to be on my own. I certainly couldn't think about a day trip out after spending 10 mins trying to get up off a bloody airbed and that's before I've even thought about getting dressed!

I'm considering options, one of which is not going at all and allowing DH to spend the week with his family and DD. Upside is that I would get a week to myself as my other DD is away abroad at the same time.

Another is to check into a hotel close by and swing in by each morning with some lovely breakfast items for them all and spend the day with them. Upside is there will be a lovely bathroom in the hotel, just for me, a cosy bed, a bar under cover and I won't have to make my bed in the morning because some lovely person will do it for me. More my idea of relaxation.

Other option is to borrow our friend's caravan (she has offered it in my hour of need!) and add a caravan pitch to our booking. That way we have a tent and a caravan. I could cope with a caravan - I think.

Out of those I think I prefer the first one, so AIBU to pull out and spend a week on my own doing my own thing and forgetting I'm a 44yr old mum of 3, wife to 1 and taxi driver to all?

OP posts:
The80sweregreat · 31/05/2016 18:56

I have hated all the camping trips I have ever tried and none of them was for long either. years ago now, but I hated the No sleep, getting up in the night for the toilets, the weird showers that were like the ones in ' carry on camping' .. spiders, the list is endless, yet people love it all, say its cheap and adore sleeping under the stars ( why?) I agree with other posters, the hotel idea is a good one if your dh and dd do not mind - if he has gone to the trouble of pretty lights ( which sound really sweet) he might be a bit sulky about it, but if not, just go with that. its your holiday as well! My in laws loved all things camping, had portable loos, a trailer all sorts. they went on about it as if it was 5 star luxury and would go for weeks at a time too. My dh is wrong side of 50 now and going to the TT on the isle of man camping soon - he really is mad I think! ( and will probably come home with a bad back..) we have never seen eye on eye on anything to do with camping. I gave up years ago with it all. muddy fields and rain are for horses!

Catmuffin · 31/05/2016 18:57

Ha ha at "He even put up little fairy lights around the rope thingies to add a little bit of glam for me Biscuit Grin

FarAwayHills · 31/05/2016 18:57

Holiday time is supposed to be a time to relax and recharge. I cannot imagine that a camping holiday offers the opportunity for any of this. Sure it's great fun for kids and Dads who want to relive their Boy Scout days but It sounds like hard work to me. Why would I want to sleep in a field when I have a perfectly comfortable house that's not in danger of blowing away in the night?

I'm with you OP, hotel sounds greatGrin

ghostyslovesheep · 31/05/2016 18:58

Airbeds are shit and cold. A decent mat from Outwell on top of a reflective matwill do you and is comfier

See I'm the opposite I hated the mat I had and it left me sore and cold but my double hight air bed is fabulous and comfy

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 31/05/2016 19:08

The poo in the hole scenario would be a deal breaker for me I'm afraid.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 31/05/2016 19:09

I cannot function without my sleep, I get really grumpy and moody and a desire to be on my own. I certainly couldn't think about a day trip out after spending 10 mins trying to get up off a bloody airbed and that's before I've even thought about getting dressed

To be honest OP, if you have this approach ^^, you're not going make it fun for anyone. Is there a reason you would take 10 minutes to get off an air bed? Genuine question, if you have physical limitations, then camping can be harder work.

I'm not mad about camping, but I'd make an effort for the rest of the family. Can you do 3 nights as a compromise? Your family would probably enjoy you making the effort, as long as you had the right attitude.

My MiL and DM always make comments like 'Oooh I don't do tents' and make a right old fuss about the very thought of camping. Bit tiresome.

BoatyMcBoat · 31/05/2016 19:18

I love camping. I'd say don't go. There's little worse than camping with someone who hates it, and going on holiday with someone whose time will be completely different to yours is not much fun either.

Stay at home or go somewhere completely different.

Iggi999 · 31/05/2016 19:20

Tent sex is great. Just sayin.

AtAt · 31/05/2016 19:20

I love camping, and we go every year with ds's family. This year however, I'll be 37 weeks pregnant. Luckily kill, dh has family that have a house that backs onto the field where we camp. I'll get the best of both worlds, relaxing outside during the day, and then a nice warm comfy bed at night. 4 year old ds will be in the tent with dh, so hopefully I'll also benefit from a few nights uninterrupted sleep as well, and no early morning wake ups Grin

averythinline · 31/05/2016 19:26

Disclaimer I like camping.. however do see why others don't ..
I would suggest the caravan option as you're still there and could possibly end up with the good bits... Chatting over wine while kids go feral imo, you can then stagger to bed.... Whereas if you're at a hotel unless it's on site it will feel like a separate trip and you'd be better off at home....

Puzzledandpissedoff · 31/05/2016 19:28

The poo in the hole scenario would be a deal breaker for me I'm afraid

Hang on, what fresh hell is this? Shock During my much regretted campsite experience they had toilet tents - they were shit (pun intended) but at least they had 'em. Please tell me folk don't actually shit in a field, having dug a hole? Please??

KERALA1 · 31/05/2016 19:34

I did. D of e 1992. Camped every summer with guides as a teen and eurocamp every summer holiday with my family. Friends think I am princessy am sure as we don't camp but tbh have done enough hole pooing bog roll carrying for one lifetime.

Luckily my lovely Dh feels the same he has refused to camp. His view is he works hard, values his holidays and does not want to live like a refugee during his precious time off. We house swap. Bliss lovely houses and no cost.

PickledLilly · 31/05/2016 19:37

The trouble is, people who like camping just can't see that some people don't. All these posters who have gaily said 'oh just get a SIM instead of an air bed/ electric hookup/heater/ you will sleep like a log the second night/ just get pissed' in their mind, solving these issues will magically make you see the light and enjoy it.

NO. Some people just don't like it. My DP did all of these things, bought a chemical toilet to remove my objection to having to go to the toilet block in the middle of the night, bought various different sleeping stuff (I still don't sleep) bought a heater, got electric hookup...the list is endless as is the pile of expensive stuff in our she'd. I still hate it and I still don't sleep no matter how many bloody nights I attempt it for. I'm pregnant with really bad SPD and he's STILL trying to persuade me to go camping this summer. I've told him repeatedly to fuck off. He still doesn't get it and thinks, despite me being bloody miserable every time he drags me along, that I will magically start enjoying it. I think perhaps camping enthusiasts are a little like Jehovah's witnesses...

If you know you won't enjoy it OP, just bloody stay at home!

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 31/05/2016 19:38

I'm not a big camper. I'm not that keen. But even I know that campsites don't have to be poo holes in the ground.

There are loads of sites with amazing views, bright, clean, warm and nice-to-use shower/loo blocks, and you can buy equipment to make it a comfortable experience. There are plenty of websites with reviews to tell you where to book if you want avoid grim.

Sitting outside with a glass of wine, and a fire pit is nice for two or three nights. You can make it perfectly civilised and drama free. If you choose to.

WriteforFun1 · 31/05/2016 19:42

"Where are the field pooers putting the toilet roll?"

this is a good point. Or are they wiping with leaves? I presume they bury loo roll in the same hole as they bury their doings...not sure how long loo roll takes to biodegrade...

I have a vague recollection of some amazing island we could have visited but didn't because of there being no loo!

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 31/05/2016 19:44

His view is he works hard, values his holidays and does not want to live like a refugee during his precious time off

Nice comment.

TwentyCupsOfTea · 31/05/2016 19:52

Caravan seems the best solution. If you stay in a hotel you will miss the best bit of camping - sitting round the fire before bed! It wouldn't be the same to stay for a bit then walk/drive off alone to a hotel.

But then I love camping so I'm biased!

SparkleSoiree · 31/05/2016 19:53

Wow, lots of different experiences and suggestions. I have to say, some of your responses have made me laugh out loud!! Glad I'm not alone in my dislike of camping either! Liking my creature comforts doesn't make me princessy, surely?!

I don't doubt there are lots of women who love camping too. I was writing the original thread with an element of flippant humour so apologies if that came across wrong.

I'm in two minds over the 'best for me' and 'best for the family' scenario. It's a family holiday and if I did what was best for me then I wouldn't go. If I do what's best for the family then I would have to go as they really want to spend the time with me - and it should be that way. What to do when the two scenarios clash though?

Agree, a hotel may feel as if I'm isolated - but I would love it!

Caravan would be closer to the tent than the hotel but I am in two minds about it, not sure why.

Sleep really is one of the biggest issues here but I love the suggestions that have been made in the way of camp beds. The toilet situation is another big problem because I detest public loos and have no idea what kind of condition the campsite loos will be in. As for shitting in a hole in the ground that will never happen in this lifetime....Can't stand the draught or the lack of dignity!

Tent sex? Hadn't even crossed my mind such is my concern over the sleeping and toilet arrangements!!

As for the Caribbean holiday I've been thinking about that some more. That will be active and the activities are ones that DH likes so I have parked the guilt about that holiday. He will love it.

Have to think long and hard about the way forward. Narrowed down to two options I think; bringing in breakfast each morning, feeling bright and breezy after a sleep in the hotel or a week at home on my own....

OP posts:
SquinkiesRule · 31/05/2016 20:00

If Dh and Dd are willing, let them go without you.
I tried it twice, first time one night and second time two nights, the daytime was fun, but I survived on very little/no sleep. I won't do that again.
I tried a caravan too, supposed to be a week, we lasted two and went home before bedtime on the third night.
From now on my idea of roughing it, is Travelodge.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 31/05/2016 20:01

And the earwigs - don't forget the earwigs - I swear every one in existence found its way into my tent Hmm

Call me unadventurous, but while tent sex may be fine in theory, I really couldn't get into the zone while worrying about one of the bastards scuttling across my bare arse

WriteforFun1 · 31/05/2016 20:03

looking at the update, I'd go for a hotel. You don't have to miss the chatting round a campfire (if they have one?) because you will go back to your hotel, feeling happy, when they go back to the tent!

BeYourselfUnlessUCanBeAUnicorn · 31/05/2016 20:09

Camping is my idea of absolute hell!

Last year a group of friends decided we should all go camping. 'Sadly' we were already away the weekend they booked. What a shame. Grin A fellow camperhater ended up going to please her DCs. She hated it. She has said she will never do it again despite the rest of them going on about it and saying they are all going to do it again, and she'll have fun, and I will etc etc. No I fucking well won't! I have no problem digging my heals in when it's something I know full well I won't like. Plus the more they bang on about how I will like it, the more I will refuse to even entertain the idea, I hate being told I will like something when I know I won't. I do like caravans (static ones though, proper ones, not tiny ones where you have to empty your own shit).

Do the caravan or hotel. Nothing wrong with that. Camping isn't for everyone and that is okay. I wouldn't like a free week though.

TwentyCupsOfTea · 31/05/2016 20:14

Tent sex is fab Grin

Catvsworld · 31/05/2016 20:15

I feel your pain op I fucking hate camping it snit a Hoilday for me it's cooking and cleaning in a tent

However I have 3 children and it only cost me £700 to go camping in the south of France for 5 weeks

My friend is going to Malta for 2 weeks with 2 children it's costing her 3k so it's no contest really and *kids love camping they just love being wild

blimeyalldecentnamesaregone · 31/05/2016 20:21

We have stayed at a campsite with b&b on site before. I had had surgery just before the trip and couldn't physically get down to the floor and back up again so DH and the kids camped and I went back to the house at the end of the evening. It worked fine.

That said usually I camp and the first night is always awful, from the second night sleep is a lot better.