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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To put my children to bed at 7pm every night?

143 replies

DreamCloud99 · 30/05/2016 19:36

Including school holidays and weekends?

My twins are 4 (almost 5) . I find that if they don't have enough sleep they are grumpy, rude and uncooperative the next day.

They also get up at 6am , no matter what time I put them to bed !

I can hear children out playing in the sunshine and one of my twins is already fast asleep

The other is in bed quietly playing a game .

I selfishly enjoy my evening time and as I go to bed myself around 9:30pm, I like to keep them in routine so I can have some down time .

But I'm not sure if this is mean? AIBU?

OP posts:

MissBattleaxe · 30/05/2016 19:39

Sounds about right for that age. You're not selfish to need some downtime after looking after twins all day!

strawberrypenguin · 30/05/2016 19:40

Sounds right to me. My 4.5 year old goes to bed at 7 too. Asleep by half past once we've done teeth/ story etc. Any later and he gets really grumpy!

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 30/05/2016 19:40

YANBU. Whatever works for your family.

Florinda2016 · 30/05/2016 19:40

Absolutely spot on.

Whyhellodaffodil · 30/05/2016 19:40

Sounds good to me, they're obviously tired if one is already asleep so why keep them up just for them to get grumpier! Enjoy your evenings

teacher54321 · 30/05/2016 19:40

Ds has just turned 4. I am a meanie who puts him to bed at around the same time every day. He always wakes early and needs his sleep.

Abbinob · 30/05/2016 19:40

Sometimes I put ds to bed at 6 and tell him it's 7 to save my sanity. He's almost 3 though but still, that's probably worse and there's only one of him.

branofthemist · 30/05/2016 19:41

I let me oldest stay up on weekends and holidays (she is 12) but the youngest (5) goes to bed at the same time.

He wakes up around 7am everyday. If he goes to bed late he is very grumpy the next day. Once he starts sleeping in I will let him stay up later.

Kiwiinkits · 30/05/2016 19:43

4 years, 5.5 years and 7 months in this family. All go to bed at 7.

winchester1 · 30/05/2016 19:43

My toddlers are down at 1800 every day as they get up 500 regardless and any later they would be grumpy and annoying.
Yh other kids near ys are up later but they lso get up later so ours just get the morning sunshine instead.

yorkshapudding · 30/05/2016 19:43

Kids that age benefit from routine and structure. If you've gotten them into a solid routine that works for you as a family then I don't see the harm in continuing with it during holidays. As someone who works with kids, i've noticed that a lot of kids around that age really struggle to adjust once the school holidays are over, making them tired and emotional, as their routine has been turned on its head and then they're expected to fall back into a schedule when term starts.

NeedACleverNN · 30/05/2016 19:44

Always keep to the routine here.It's what they are used to and makes it easier to get them up again when nursery starts

Giggorata · 30/05/2016 19:44

One of my childhood memories is hearing the children out playing when I was in bed... I felt so envious & left out. For all I know, I was grumpy, rude & uncooperative the next day if I stayed up late. But in the light evenings & school holidays, it felt like torture & punishment. Couldn't you let them out to play later in the school holidays & have a nap during the day?
(As a parent, I know what you mean about downtime, however! 😀)

pointythings · 30/05/2016 19:44

That was bedtime for mine at that age, sounds fine. You know how much sleep they need. As long as you adjust bedtime as they get older, they'll be fine.

makingmiracles · 30/05/2016 19:45

Yanbu, people are shocked that mine go to bed at that time also and range from that age to 12, but in term time we all have to rise early for a long school run so our body clocks are set to get up early, they don't go immediately to sleep, they watch a DVD or read till about 9 but funny enough it's the oldest one who is normally asleep by 8.30! He's a challenging child though so I think he exerts so much energy in the day behaviour wise that his body can't cope with staying up late.

There are some round here who's kids are still out playing till gone 9pm, which is fine but their kids then don't wake till 9/10 the next day, unfortunately it doesn't matter what time mine go to bed, they still rise early.
I think you have to do what works best for your kids and your family and no it's not mean to want a clue of hours to yourself!

tryingtocatchthewind · 30/05/2016 19:45

My little boy is around the same age and goes to bed for 6:45pm, goes straight to sleep happily and stays there till 7am. I'm a full believer in getting them to bed early and nicely rested plus I'm demented by then and want them in bed!

TheUnsullied · 30/05/2016 19:46

YANBU. I'm a single parent to a toddler. The wheels on the bus cease to go round and round at 7pm sharp because I value my bloody sanity. I've been asked when I'll be letting her go to bed later...when she stays at other peoples' houses and I get a night off, that's when!

EponasWildDaughter · 30/05/2016 19:47

Fine.

My 3 older ones were always in their room tucked down or reading quietly by 6.30/7 unless there was a very good reason not to be (family do, wedding, holiday ect). Good habit carried on till they were early teens to be honest. Not asleep at 7, but being quiet on their rooms.

No.4 is in the same routine. She's upstairs in her cot singing at the mo mind you

PotteringAlong · 30/05/2016 19:48

Hell no! My 4 year old and 1 year old have been asleep for about an hour already!

MummyBex1985 · 30/05/2016 19:48

My twins were in bed asleep at 6:30 every night at that stage. They could barely keep their eyes open after 6pm!

NapQueen · 30/05/2016 19:48

Totally fine! And those kids are probably a bit older anyways, playing out.

My dd (4 and half) is in bed for seven, tonight she went down at 6 as we had been out all day at a county show so she's been walking and in the fresh air for 6 hours straight. DS is 18mo and he usually goes at 6.30. Tonight 6am too but he has been really restless so o ly gone to sleep about 20mins s ago.

Momamum · 30/05/2016 19:49

You've brought back a memory of childhood for me, OP....lying in bed in summer, listening to other children playing outside, before I fell asleep

We were three children and 7.0m was always our bedtime, too, tho we were allowed to read until 8.00 and then definitely lights off. And that was our routine until I was 10-11.

EponasWildDaughter · 30/05/2016 19:49

''I've been asked when I'll be letting her go to bed later''

My outlaws were always openly snotty about my fairly rigid bed time routine for DDs. Their other GC of the same sort of age were always still roaming about at 10 and 11 o'clock at night. Bugger that!

BathshebaDarkstone · 30/05/2016 19:49

YANBU. DS 4.9 goes to bed 6 on school nights and 5 otherwise, DD 8.8 goes at 7 on school nights and 6 otherwise. They'd be exhausted if they didn't.

Lelloteddy · 30/05/2016 19:49

YANBU. Mine have always had a good routine and early bedtimes. They have plenty of playtime during the day and they have no issues going to bed at bedtime, even though they're a lot older than 4 now.

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