A thread for non bridge dwellers

[WorraLiberty]

Thread rules

You must NOT be a trucker called Malcolm or Brian

No spiky hair over 4 inches high, no matter how cute it may look.

Now, is there anyone left tonight who fits this description?

Or am I alone?

Me!

Just give me two minutes to park my lorry, shave my knuckles and flatten me hair and I'll be right with you....

We need this!

drags self in. I am not a troll but apparently got taken in by one tonight.

well, no matter. I am limiting myself to threads about husband sniffing and crumply linen and VPL horror stories.

I gave "dawnmumsnet* a bottle gin on a thread earlier to help see her through the bank holiday weekend. Just before the thread went puff. She's already been busy then.

What have I missed? I seem to have luckily only been on genuine threads tonight.

Agree with Catz , that's definitely what we need. That or maybe some sort of alarm or klaxon. I'm too old and tired for this shit. At the risk of being a bit "I remember when all this were fields..." I think the troll situation round here has been dire of late. I blame the Daily Fail, for most things really.

It is nightwatch now or just report ?

Oh honey did you get your bagounias(sp?) Planted?

I am pregnant with twins which apparently makes me a troll. Except I really am pregnant with twins. So now I am confused and don't know if I'm a troll or not. But I am definitely hairy as I can no longer reach the bits that need shaving. So probably a troll.

DS (17 today) has just got home from a party.

He's literally had 3 small ciders and he loves absolutely everyone

Not sure why he's waving around an 8inch blow up doll from B&M, or where he got the fairy wings and tiara, but I've sent him to chat chew the ear off DH until he buggers off to bed.

Checking in. No spikey hair or truck and my names not Brian. or lois

Bill, perhaps you're pregnant with twin trolls?

I gave dawnmumsnet a bottle gin on a thread earlier to help see her through the bank holiday weekend. Just before the thread went puff. She's already been busy then

Poor Dawn

This has occurred to me. If they look anything like FIL they won't be far off.

I am so sick of trolls. It has definitely been much worse recently, the last few months but especially this past few weeks.
Fed up of it and really coming close to a point where I CBA with MN much longer. As a pp said, I'm too old and too tired for it.

< pokes thread suspiciously, peers at Worra for signs of hairy feet >

It's like Middle Earth on Mumsnet atm, with all these sodding trolls roaming around.
I had to boot this one up the arse on my way here.

Wtf is going on ? Is it their breeding season ?

Which thread was it this time? Missed the deletion message.

How do we know worra isn't a troll? Her teenager apparently loves everyone.... Hmmmm that's rather outlandish.

Actually I do sometimes get hairs on the big toe of my left foot.

Strokes. Dammit.

**

Oh fuck

Lois had knocked herself out.

DS has just informed me that "Richard has got home safely" because he's just messaged him.

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy about that but...who the actual fuck is Richard?

AHA, hairy toes ! Gotcha.
I always thought Worra might be dodgy < loads water pistol with Troll-Raid >

I know a Richard. He doesn't always make it home safely so that's good news.

Was it the Richard found in a car park?

I find BigChoc's green troll rather endearing. Unlike the ones we get here.