have you ever come into contact with a psychopath?

[ollieplimsoles]

Me and dh love discussing psychology and people's traits/ thinking.

I have a strong suspicion that my father is a high functioning psychopath. He's incapable of expressing any emotion other than anger. He is a pathological liar, a cheat, aggressive and manipulative. He's also very grandiose and resourceful, he seems to have no fear and often leaps into things other people wouldn't dare do.

One of dh's uncles also possesses many of the traits.

Aibu to ask- do you suspect anyone?

Yes. Worst one is the ex husband of a friend. Next worse a CEO where I used to work. Have also met a couple of others, not surprisingly holding similar top jobs.

If you are interested, Snakes in Suits and the Psychopath Test are fascinating reading (the latter refers a fair bit to the former)

They can leave huge scars when you get rid of them, I was in counseling for years over my Dad.

I knew a woman in a frindship group whilst she was in and out of hospital as an in patient. Eventually she said she had a narcissistic trait anti social personality dx. I don't think she was of a very high IQ as I guessed she was behind things. Thankfully she wasn't interested in me too boring so mostly left me alone.

I had taken a step back from them all due to so many odd things happening. My previous BF blanked me for a year. One night I was out with another group and we bumped into each other and all kinds came out. I was never so grateful to be dumped as a friend.

I am not in touch with former BF as she is FB friends with the psychopath. She thinks I dictated her friends, I didn't I said I can't be friends with someone with a psychopath in their life as it could harm me.

I also think my EXH and his family have some kind of issue maybe narcs, who knows. His DS was in the press for dodgy behaviour with public finds.

To be fair though, doesn't everyone have an ex who they think was a psychopath?

Psychopathy is actually a legal definition rather than a medical one. It describes a set of symptoms which we know can be associated with dangerousness, but makes no comment on what caused them. Some research says that psychopathy is really a combination of personality disorders (narcissistic personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder).

In my previous job I assessed for psychopathy and worked with people who scored highly on the psychopathy scale.

My exh is a sociopath. A very dangerous person. I survived, just.

I have most of the traits but my strong sense of right and wrong and community spirit means I fail. Lucky for everyone I guess ;)

You should read "the psychopath test" fab book.

They estimate that circa 1-4% of the population is a psychopath so chances are very high you will have encountered one. Vast majority of psychopaths are male but there are also female ones. I have encountered a few at work (in legal sector). Characterised by lack of empathy, coldness, ruthlessness and a love of playing with people's emotions (think stuff like firing someone 'for a laugh') and similar behaviour in relationships (repeated infidelity, openly admitting to others that he is getting married for his partner's money). The ones I have met have made my skin physically crawl in their company. I think I have relatively good radar for psychopaths. My own dad is not a psychopath but a textbook narcissist and they are also fairly unpleasant.

A relative. And they were awful

Had a friend who in retrospect was either a psychopath or a sociopath. She seemed like my soul mate and we were very close for around 7 years. Then something seemed to snap in her and her real self came through and even then it took a year to see it all and make sense of it and then, of course, it ALL made sense. I don't believe she feels emotions the way normal people do - she has no conscience, no empathy unless it's gushing and faked to benefit her, no loyalty, no gratitude - nothing. I've seen her lavished with gifts and then shit royally on the giver of the gifts. I've seen her rewrite history so that she's the victim and everyone else was insane. It's all pretty ugly actually.

In my previous job I assessed for psychopathy and worked with people who scored highly on the psychopathy scale.

I would love a chance to interview someone who scored highly. Do they still use the 40 point scale based on 20 traits?

I've seen her rewrite history so that she's the victim and everyone else was insane.

This ^ is my Dad, he has the ultimate knack for this, honestly

Yes, I have worked with a sociopath. It took me a few years to work it out. It was very scary when I realised and several things fell into place. Half the people still thought the person was wonderful and thought I was insane for keeping out of person's way.

How did you figure it out? Did he do something to you, or did you just deduce it from things other people knew, too?

I have never had to spend enough time with a very nasty person to be able to tell if they were a psychopath or not.

However, once met a man who told me he thought he might be a psychopath. Since he never did anything nasty (that I witnessed) I'm not sure if he was just trying to make himself interesting. (Is that a thing? I have no idea, but men sometimes have really strange ideas about what makes them interesting to women.)
Do actual psychopaths walk around telling people what they are?

I think I've known 2 or they were very close to it.

One was a total control freak liar who'd make your life hell if you crossed her. Everyone thought she was great, she was until you did something she didnt like. She tried to control my love life.

The other I know has severe mental health issues and was sectioned. She lied quite frequently about outrageous things. She was also very manipulative, proper crocodile tears. I feel sorry for her though, her first husband was a horrid cunt and she just seems to be a downward spiral.

Gone "To be fair though, doesn't everyone have an ex who they think was a psychopath?"

No. I def don't, many of my friends don't have them either. The friend I mentioned had a truly extraordinary experience.

When I was 19, pure unadulterated evil. I still have nightmares, never anything physical but he was pure evil. Thankfully I got out relatively unscathed, someone else had his child many years later, it scares me that his genes have carried on. Looking back I cannot remember a single true word that came out of his mouth, looking back it is almost laughable what I put myself through. I wish him nothing but death.

Only a sociopath and that was fecking awful

My ex wasnt a psychopath, just suffered with being a dickhead sometimes. Dont know if he thinks I am though.

I wonder who the psychopath is at my work. Theres about 40 of us so there has to be one. Bet its one of the doctors.

I heard on the radio recently that back in the 70's when government was making plans for a nucleur strike that they initially had plans to put psychopaths in charge of any survivor groups as the psychopath would make life and death decissions removed from emotion.

Oo
Sure, a psychopath would not do something dangerously stupid out of fear. He would, however, throw everyone else to the wolves in order to get out completely unscathed himself.

Not really a good idea.

Yes my ex.

My parents first born(so what was my oldest brother)lots of us have all gone NC.My Mum and Dad confided in me a few years ago that they had sensed things about him when he was young.

He is an evil bastard,he's screwed most of the family over including my DM not long before she passed.All 6 of his children have shown the same traits(they're all adults now)so most of family have gone NC with them as well,no surprise there really!
People that don't know think he's great and the same with some of his children,but some of the stuff he's done and his kids have done honestly they are all pure evil!

Those that know avoid them all at any cost!