Cancelling a week before wedding

[GabsAlot]

I am fuming for my sister-her wedding is a week today and a guest has cancelled due to a football match

They said cant be helped we're in the play offs-They RSVP'd months ago and have no cancelled a week before the wedding

They were all day guests him and his son

I think its completely out of order and he doesnt even seem bothered

More of a rant really but im not being unreasonable am i?

As pp have written, as least they had the courtesy to let you know. We had two guests just not show up for our wedding, never got an explanation, let alone an apology... The wedding will still happen and, more importantly, the marriage!

Those who aren't football fans obviously don't understand

I'm not a football fan. I do however send sympathetic messages to a friend of mine when his team lose important matches. He takes football very seriously. I would also expect him not to show up if I ever got married on a day his team were playing at Wembley. In fact, I'd not want him there as I know he'd be distracted and not enjoying it I'd expect a damn good wedding present though

if my team was in a play off final and a non-close relative (ie not my son) I would go to the game rather than the wedding. However I would offer to pay for my missed meal etc. Football is far more important than almost all weddings.

This will be much bigger than any cup final. Play off finals are huge. So huge that we have just paid to delay international flights by a few days so we can be at Wembley to support our team. I am acutely aware not everyone understands this but I would never expect DD1 or DH to miss this match. It is a huge event for our family. So were it someone cancelling coming to my wedding I'd be understanding.

apologies for the outburst just a very emotional time

thanks for the replies and im sure we'll all have a great day :)

It is rude, but I can see how it happens, my team were knocked out in the semis but I'd have been absolutely gutted to have had to miss the final if they had got through. I would have gone to the wedding though.

We deliberately chose the weekend after the playoffs and before the European championships started for our wedding for this very reason.

If your sister has to pay for those who found something

OP I get that you're very upset. It sounds though as if this is more about how much you two will miss your mother on your sister's big day. IMO the cousin is just a bit of a side issue, though his actions have brought these feelings to the fore.

I'm not a football fan, never have been, nor are our family, but actually I can see that on this occasion it is actually something that for some people is very important and would take priority over anything else.

I think also they have had the grace yo tell you and be truthful about it. I'll bet if he'd posted it on here there would be a number telling him to say he,was ill, certainly if it was school/work they would.

Irritated, yes, irate.. Not worth it.

Sorry. Better to do it's still worth asking someone that she couldn't fit in before.
My parents were given 6 month's notice of a wedding & a week before the bride's mother invited my partner & me. She said she knew I wasn't stupid & would realise why we had the last-minute invite. We arranged a B&B & had a great time.

I totally understand your annoyance. However the semi finals to see who went to the play offs at Wembley only took place this week and the tickets for Wembley would have gone on sale after the results, so they have only got tickets within a matter of a couple of days at most. If they are as big football fans as you say, I would have expected the rest of the family to be aware of their team's placing and the possibility of a clash. If I were you, I'd be more worried about the possibility of the guests wanting to watch the play off whilst at the wedding venue. I went to a wedding on cup final day and most of the men went to the bar to watch the match. They had to be called back to the reception for the food and the speeches, they then followed the match on their phones with audible oohs and ahs depending on how the game progressed.

I am not a football fan but my children are.

If I had the chance to take them to Wembley to see their favourite team I would cancel going to the wedding.

Is it rude? Yes, it is a bit but weddings are only really a big deal for the people getting married and if I could take my child to an important match at Wembley I too would cancel going to the wedding because it would mean the world to my children and while I can't stand football I wouldn't want them to miss that opportunity. It would be a very rare opportunity for them and football was something they watched and loved with their deceased father who would take them if he was alive. NWIH would I go to a cousin's wedding in these circumstances.

I would offer to cover any costs though.

Absolutely bloody rude, I'm talking about your cousin op and your posts originalfoogirl hope nobody ever invites you to an event they care about when you've got such a bloody awful attitude

Yanbu op

OP

I just saw your last post. I now understand why this has hurt you so much.

We bumped a few people up. The way to phrase it is: "some people we had to invite have RSVPed no so now we can invite more people we actually like"

I'd be absolutely fine with accepting a last minute invitation as a "bumped up" substitute by the way, it would be a lovely surprise.

LittleRed - that's very possibly my local team as well. Not that I'm bothered 😂

OP - condolences on your and your sisters loss. Would there be an old neighbour or teacher who you have fond memories of who watched you both grow up who may wish to come?

And don't invite the cousin again. He was very rude.

thanks all yes its rude no not the end of the world she just feels like theres less family than before and like i said dont have many left

no aunts or uncles either

Family is overrated.

wow sunnymeg that is beyond rude

i know my sister wouldnt stand for that she would prob tell them all phnes were banned lol

A guest cancelled it's hardly the end of the world. She will still Marry the man she loves with or without guests there.

They told her a week before, could of just been sick on the day. Why doesn't she just offer somebody else an invite one of her friends or yours even just to fill it, a lot of people would accept as they love weddings plus free food and drink

thanks for everyones wishes and thoughts

it wasnt recent but we miss our mum terribly

will try and chill now and look forward to the wedding

It is rude. I'm getting married next Saturday, everything arranged down to place settings, table planner printed etc (came today). I'll be peeved if we get 11th hour cancellations for something like a football match because I'm fairly stressed about stuff as it is (to an extent, but not losing sleep extent iykwim).

congrats janey have a lovely day :)

Thanks OP, I get what you say about your mum too, mine died 2.5 yrs ago (very, very few other relatives), so next Saturday will be a tough day in parts - hope you have a great day too (and the weather cheers up for us all ha ha).