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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Babies in travel systems

430 replies

Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 08:03

Am I bu that I just get the rage when I see babies in carseats clunked to the pram?

Am I being a judgypants?

Fair enough on the nip in & out jobs like school run.

But supermarket? Theme park? National trust gardens? Running? Town? Zoo? Places were the child is likely going to have been in that carseat for a few hours!

They've already been in it for the car journey. I bet likely, some will only be out of them all day for feeding time.

I watched holiday supersavers last night and the baby did the walk to supermarket, around supermarket and walk nack home again in the flippin carseat!

I just want to go up to them and tell them to stop being lazy and think of their child's spine development.

OP posts:
ArcticMumkey · 11/05/2016 09:59

YABU

As a new mum this kind of pearl cluthing drives me mad. My HV 'helpfully' told me not to have DD in the carseat for more than 30 minutes, to wake her if she fell asleep in it and if she fell asleep in the carrycot to whip her out immediately when i got home. How the hell is that workable? I got myself in such a sleep deprived state trying to follow this before I chucked her advice out and did what works for me, which is what parenting is basically!

As an aside, I want to go clothes shopping this week, if DD can't go in her car seat, is too big to go in her carrycot and too small to sit upright in a pram what the hell do I do?!

NerrSnerr · 11/05/2016 10:00

The lullaby trust say there's not enough research about the risk of SIDS and car seats. When pregnant I read a lot about the importance of the baby lying flat and went with that. I'm another who was very worried about SIDS and did all the things listed and made sure I followed the guidelines exactly (and I still press my ear up to the monitor a few times a night and she's nearly 2!)

I know that we cannot prevent all cases of SIDS but I wanted to make sure that if the worst happened I knew that I did everything in my power to keep her safe. Not using the car seat for long periods when and stopping a million times on long journeys was just a part of that.

Toddzoid · 11/05/2016 10:00

You're seeing a snapshot of those peoples lives. Most people in the supermarket aren't there for hours Hmm. Carseats cost a fortune, may as well get your money's worth. It's convenient in that you don't have to wake the baby up if it falls asleep in the car (as they often do) and for some babies with GERD they need to be upright. also some peoples cars aren't large enough to accommodate a clunky carrycot attachment.

So many things at play here. What it ultimately boils down to is that in the grand scheme of things this really doesn't matter. At all. I actually find it hilarious how people on here get het up over the tiniest of things. Who even sees a baby in a travel system and thinks "oh what awful parents! Don't they know about the spine problems that could cause." Most people are, you know, too focused on their own life...

Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:01

Frankly I still think it's ridiculous. This thread had made me even judgier about them.

I struggle to believe that people can't cope with the baby years without on of these travel systems.

Do you use them in the house too? When cooking dinner? Does baby sleep in it at night too?

OP posts:
albazavi · 11/05/2016 10:02

I found this article the most helpful.

www.madeformums.com/news-and-gossip/the-2-hour-car-seat-rule---what-you-need-to-know/39322.html

What's interesting is the deaths from different devices. Vast majority of babies who died in a car seat did so outside of the car ie being allowed to sleep when at home.

Also interesting is the amount of babies who died in a sling (higher than a rocker).

This is not meant to critics people who use slings/ car seats/ rockers. We've used all three and certainly used the car seat attached to the pram when he was little- but always kept to the 2 he rule.

It seems to me that there are benefits/ risks with every travelling system, even slings and mothers need to know the risks and weigh these up for themselves.

There seems a lot of people saying that slings are the be- all and end- all. My 5 week old hates his sling, he's an independent soul who doesn't like being enclosed and often seems to get far too hot!

His newborn insert for the pram is lined with fleece (3 layes when done up properly) which has been horrendous in the recent heat!

We all do what we think is best. I don't think there are mothers out there who intentionally put their babies at risk!

RaeSkywalker · 11/05/2016 10:04

Just read the study linked by OP earlier in the thread. It says that 89% of car seat deaths occur outside the car, when the seats are used as "sleeping devices" in the home.

It also says "an infant in a properly positioned car seat, in a car, with the straps properly positioned is at little risk of strangulation or suffocation". It says that car seats are most dangerous when unsecured (e.g. left with baby in on the floor). It actually doesn't recommend a length of time for being in the seats but says that babies should be supervised at all times.

It also says that slings are "particularly hazardous" as the baby's face isn't always visible.

The study does not look at SIDS deaths. It doesn't attempt to say which sitting/carrying device is most dangerous (it also looks at bouncers).

It doesn't talk at all about travel systems.

this was a really interesting read for me, and is definitely valuable- I'm just not sure that it entirely supports the arguments of the OP.

Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:04

I did get my money's worth toddz the carseat I bought for my ds was his from birth until he was 4, and then was given to dd from birth. She is 2 and still has 2yrs left in it before we upgrade. It's never left our car

OP posts:
YorkieDorkie · 11/05/2016 10:05

I'm seeing lots of PP mentioning 30 mins tops, where is this guideline? I'm googling and the main article still states 2 hours. I'm driving from York to Tonbridge in June so would appreciate clarification!

Butterchunks · 11/05/2016 10:06

This thread had made me even judgier about them

Yes, we can see that.

Do you use them in the house too? When cooking dinner? Does baby sleep in it at night too?

No, no, and, no. Stop making assumptions about other people and how they look after their children.

Boogers · 11/05/2016 10:06

No, a Moses basket on the floor when I was downstairs, a cot when I was upstairs. Can't carry a Moses basket on the school run though.

You be as judgey as you like, it's your blood pressure you're increasing.

Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:07

But how do people cope without them buttechicks no one can seem to go out in the day with out putting baby in one for their sanity.
What happens in the home and at night?

OP posts:
TheEagle · 11/05/2016 10:07

You never answered my question about the other SIDS risks OP.

I've never left my babies sleep in their infant car seat in the house. Or had them in them while I was cooking a meal, no.

Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:08

Why not use a carrycot then boogers of you're happy with a moses in the house?

OP posts:
Only1scoop · 11/05/2016 10:08

I for one didn't have a 'travel system' OpConfused

Stop generalising and for goodness sake, you know you couldn't give a Shiny Shite about other baby's spinal development.

or your nephews pooing position.

Very busy for your first day on mumsnet

Take it easy

Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:08

theeagle I put enougj links to reaearch on here.

OP posts:
gwenneh · 11/05/2016 10:09

You did. They just don't actually support what you're saying.

RedToothBrush · 11/05/2016 10:09

Frankly I still think it's ridiculous. This thread had made me even judgier about them.

Code for I can't provide relevant information about relative risk, the quality of studies or who is providing this advice so that parents can make an educated and informed decision.

Instead, I will stick to my point stubbornly with my fingers stick in my ears going 'lalala' because I believe this.

Well frankly I don't care what you believe. I'd like to see some good old fashioned solid evidence.

Afterall a shocking number of people still believe in fairies

If you are passionate about this, then do so in a constructive way and then come back and educate people in a non-confrontational manner. People are rather more receptive to this approach than your judgmental attitude.

Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:09

Not my 1st day only
My 1st antagonising post though

OP posts:
Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:10

Whats wrong with my links?

OP posts:
LyndaNotLinda · 11/05/2016 10:11

My son is 9. I only had a travel system when he was a baby so that's what he went in. Most of my friends did the same.

No spinal problems.

YABU and need something else to think about in your life.

Original poster
Excusemeforpostinghere · 11/05/2016 10:11

There is evidence, studied with 200 babies showing that their oxygen levels are depleted when in the carseat

OP posts:
RedToothBrush · 11/05/2016 10:11

You don't understand the research you are linking to and the conclusions they come to.

This is quite important.

Some would say, rather crucial.

RedToothBrush · 11/05/2016 10:12

There is evidence, studied with 200 babies showing that their oxygen levels are depleted when in the carseat

And as I asked before which you ignored, what does this ACTUALLY MEAN?

TheEagle · 11/05/2016 10:12

I'm talking about the post where I asked you if you are so fastidious about the other SIDS risks to babies or is it just this one that you've fixated on?

This might boil your blood but my twins often napped in their bouncy chairs Shock

Only1scoop · 11/05/2016 10:12

Funnily enough we used the carrycot we bought for chassis for daytime naps or the Moses on a stand downstairs....

Now when cooking....hmm let me see dd would sleep in her high chair....

Hoik your judgey pants up about that....

It's the Bloom one that converts to a cradle....

Pop that in pearl clutching sling and smoke on it Grin