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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think when I'm running you shouldn't throw water over me

151 replies

woolypigs · 06/05/2016 23:40

Went running yesterday, next to traffic. I was aware of a red van next to me and the occupants shouted at me, I blanked them and carried on running. When the van caught up with me (due to traffic) as they drove past they threw water at me.
I was left feeling quite upset

OP posts:
JeanGenie23 · 07/05/2016 10:51

Just got back from a run, no ward throwing incidents but it's so bloody hot today i may have welcomed it! If anyone does go out keep hydrated!!

There was a real issue near me with lurkers along the canal now it's light I run down there again but I am wary. Running in groups is always safer if you can find someone to with!

JeanGenie23 · 07/05/2016 10:52

Should say no water throwing**

dailyfailrag · 07/05/2016 10:54

Ugh yeah it's awful when children are with you and people still behave like that. I had a group of disgusting lads yelling 'MILF MIIILLLFF' at me when I was walking with my DS4. He asked me 'why are those men shouting?' Fucking wankers.

KERALA1 · 07/05/2016 10:56

Had an egg thrown at me once when walking down the street. And been called slag, cunt etc shouted from passing cars.

What's maddening is commentary from some men about this huffing that women are so touchy and poor men can't give compliments anymore Hmm. They have no fucking IDEA.

problembottom · 07/05/2016 10:59

Oh my goodness these stories are absolutely terrible.

I was upset last year when I was training for a 10k and doing mile loops in the park. This gobby teenage lad kept shouting about my big ass, clearly to impress his mates. After a couple of loops I stopped and gave him what for and he scarpered the pathetic little shit. I had heard him abusing other women runners too.

If anyone threw anything at me I'd be taking their picture and calling the police.

JonSnowsBeardClippings · 07/05/2016 10:59

God, this thread has depressed me
I had a man make a kind of eurgh/phwoar loud throat clearing noise at me out of a parked van. I was pushing ds in a pram. I waked over and confronted him I was so angry. He denied doing anything on purpose of course but I like to think he looked embarrassed.

redexpat · 07/05/2016 11:00

I got a water bomb on my chest when I was waiting at traffic lights to cross. I was so shocked I didn't get the reg. I cried.

redexpat · 07/05/2016 11:02

Are there runner cams available? You know how some cyclists have cameras attached to their helmets.

RubbishRobotFromTheDawnOfTime · 07/05/2016 11:06

These incidents of shouting obscenities and throwing stuff, even water, should all be reported to police. Seriously.

glassgarden · 07/05/2016 11:09

start wearing cameras at all times many cyclists do and upload footage of bad behaviour to you tube, not sure if there are cameras that you can comfortably wear running but if not I'm sure it won't be long before we all wear tiny cameras

glassgarden · 07/05/2016 11:11

If it was a hot day I'd be pleased to have water thrown at me, I often stop to stand under the fountain en route in the summer

JeanGenie23 · 07/05/2016 11:13

If there were running cams available I would wear one.

WriteforFun1 · 07/05/2016 11:14

Sorry this happened to you OP
Sorry to say it's so common I don't know how people cope
I only go running in a park with loads of runners
I'd always run facing oncoming traffic though, you don't want them at your back
Same with doing any kind of long walk
Sad I know.

WriteforFun1 · 07/05/2016 11:17

Rede expat, your story is particularly shocking. I used to wonder why I saw so many women wearing scarves in hot weather but then I realised it's probably to prevent comments and incidents like this. Just awful.

Original poster
woolypigs · 07/05/2016 11:18

Thanks all for your messages. I am shocked at how many people have had similar experiences.

OP posts:
KeithLeMonde · 07/05/2016 11:19

Touch wood I have never had anyone threaten me while running. I know that people shout abuse but that's why I always have headphones in - I am aware enough of my surroundings to know that someone's shouting but I can blank it out.

Sadly I know a lot of male runners who also get abuse, things thrown, spitting etc. The perpetrators seem to be exlusively male - never heard of women shouting from vans/cars although I do know of both male and female runners who have had abuse shouted by groups of teenage girls. I would hesitate to call this a sexism thing, although I would imagine that it can be much more intimidating for a lone female runner than for your average male runner.

Why do people feel the need to be such twats to each other? :(

MonsterClaws · 07/05/2016 11:20

I running the dark often around midnight as I tend to get in around 11pm after work. I don't get any hassle and I am not at all convinced it's more dangerous to be a night runner. It feels lovely and calm usually- dunno if it's worth a go for you. When I did an earlier shift I didn't get much in the way of insults but kept getting offers of chips...

I know if I hit the main roads I would get beeps and comments- I suffer a huge startle reflex and a big fight response so best avoided as situations go. Have had a few incidents when with the kids 'mummy why did you kick that man's van' ... But it pisses me off that I have to make adjustments because of arse holes

Sorry you had that experience :(

PovertyPain · 07/05/2016 11:22

If it was a hot day I'd be pleased to have water thrown at me, I often stop to stand under the fountain en route in the summer

Seriously? It's bad enough that we have men playing down this crappy behaviour, we don't need women making light if it too. Have you not read how upset women find this behaviour? By downplaying it, you give permission to some men to think of it as a laugh.

WorraLiberty · 07/05/2016 11:23

Horrible thing to happen OP Thanks

But this has to win the most bizarre thread title ever Grin

JeanGenie23 · 07/05/2016 11:24

PovertyPain- although it wasn't me that said what you quoted, I did say something similar, not with the intention of taking away from a serious problem, but just to lighten the thread. No offence meant at all.

BoneyBackJefferson · 07/05/2016 11:25

crappymummy

although you prove that its not just men and boys doing this, you are just as bad as them as in the end you are insulting and harassing an innocent party.

QueenLaBeefah · 07/05/2016 11:34

I was walking home a couple of months ago and some teenage boys decided to start calling me disgusting names.

I went straight home and phoned the local high school and the head teacher invited me in for a cup of coffee. He showed me photos of any possible culprits and I was easily able to identify them. They got a proper bollocking.

MarthaCliffYouCunt · 07/05/2016 11:37

Glad to hear it queen

In the absence of runner cams, keep your phone on you and take a photo of anyone who throws objects of insults. You dont have to confront them, you dont have to engage at all or explain what youre going to do with the photo but neither should you hide the fact that youre taking it. It might make them think twice if they think they can be idenitified ao easily and reported.

glassgarden · 07/05/2016 11:38

What I mean is that the application of water is quite helpful to a runner on a hot day
Pretty sure that male runners and cyclists also get hassle from people in cars

1horatio · 07/05/2016 11:56

Somebody once did this to me when I was cycling... YANBU!! It's a really pathetic and dangerous thing to do. My DP sometimes says I'm a ninja, simply because I'm always so hyper aware of what's happening around me when I'm in public... But I've had just too many experiences like this (mostly when I was younger. Now I've created a routine where stuff like this is less likely to happen, but this isn't how it's supposed to be!!)

Anyhow, enough of me. People that do this are just really shitty. If you can I think you should report them. Even if nothing happens it shows that their actions could have.... uncomfortable results.