To be shocked at Dd's friend's tampon experience

[EdithBouvierBeale]

DD is ten and her class just had the period chat at school. One little girl, whose mum is a GP, was shown how to insert a tampon. Her mother demonstrated on herself by lying on her bed while her 10 year old DD watched.

My mum used to be a midwife and did the exact same thing to me.

I was a little bit surprised at the time but it did completely demystify it.

She's not even especially liberal but I think having a job where fanjo blood was freely shared on a daily basis meant it wasn't a big deal to her at all.

I did used to have recurring nightmares about her deciding to do a similar demo for sex education too though... luckily it never happened!

This is the girl talking bollocks though isn't it.

However I think it's fine. Better than your gynaecologist dad taking you through it which is creepy and controlling I.m.O.

I change my sanitary pads in front of my girls (5&7) quite openly. And answer questions about it if they ask. My mum was really uptight about all this stuff so I am determined not to be.

Both my kids have seen me put in & take out tampons.

A demonstration whilst lying on a bed would have seemed odd, especially as that's not how I put them in!

I question the usefulness of it....I mean, there's only so many places it can go, isn't there? Particularly if the girl hasn't even started her periods yet. It smacks a bit of 'look how cool and open I am with it all'.

I also would have been less than impressed about seeing my mother's chuff. The fact that the daughter was 'disgusted' with it makes me think it was more for the mother's benefit than the daughters.

I was intrigued by the phrase tampon experience in the thread title and felt a little let down that it was only about a demo by a practically minded Mum....
Thought we were into extreme tampon territory (insertion while up a mountain, 200 m underwater, while tightrope walking, whatever).

If they're both comfortable being so open then more power to her. I don't think it's inappropriate at all. You realise that the same bits you are so squeamish about them seeing are the ones you pushed them out through in the first place, yeah?

My 3 older ones saw me change pads and pop tampons in and out if they happened to be in the bathroom with me.

I think they started to actually have an interest in what i was doing at about 7 or 8 ish and while sat there on the loo (as well as saying again all the usual stuff about periods being normal but a pain in the arse) i would show them the applicator and tampon and how it worked and how easy it was to pop one in.

They would only see my hands disappear and reappear with the empty applicator though. I didn't go for the full vag display

My DDs say the best advice for beginners is: to aim the tampon at just above your bum when you push it in and to breath and relax while you do it. Another tip is to relax your jaw muscles if you think you feel tense. It seems to make relaxing your pelvic floor muscles easier as well.

(useful for smear tests ;))

wandering I've made a mental note of the nose picking comment in case I need it in a few years.

I think it was a pointless exercise given that insertion is more about feeling and manoeuvring than just watching a tampon going in in a vague direction.

My DD follows me into the toilet regularly so she has of course seen me inserting tampons on numerous occasions. She's only 4 but hopefully she will remember that it is all normal and not in any sense dirty or shameful, when she gets to 10.

I think it's hilarious that so many people think that a mother demonstrating to her ten year old how to insert a tampon is incredible/made-up/weird. I think it's natural and not wildly unconventional. As a pp said, my 4 year old son has seen me change a tampon so many times he could probably do a demo of his own.

God no way would I ever get over seeing where I came from in such close up.

Complete silly argument to say people are squeamish about the body part one pushes the child out of. The baby doesn't know and unless you're advocating 100% c sections there is no other option.

Good on her.

If I got all my information only from my mother, I would not even know tampons exist.

Don't know if I'll be doing a demonstration like the OP describes, but I'm determined to be more open and informative than my mother was. Which obviously won't be difficult.

hairymelon I was beginning to think I was the only person on this thread who figured out how to use tampons from the instructions on the leaflet in the packet

There are plenty of women who have had their other children around them when they have given birth. Again, not something that I would do but there's nothing intrinsically wrong with it.

This thread has given me an insight into how utterly unprudish I am. It would not even occur to me that this would be an issue.

I like this thread, many completely divergent opinions and hardly an issue that other people don't share your view.

If only every Mumsnet thread were like it.

As long as the dc is fine with it who cares

I think that's great. I wouldn't do it myself but I would talk it through and make it seem normal. My mum just went on about the negatives of them and to this day I am a pad user!

If my DD aged 11 catches sight of me nude, she says "EW! Mum! Put it away!"

If I offered to demo tampon insertion she'd probably leave home.

I would imagine all of us here who have used tampons managed to do so without an actual demonstration. It just seems unnecessary.

She's a GP. How many of the squeamish here have seen their GP about a vaginal prolapse, or polyps, or haemorrhoids, or a faecal impaction? I can imagine the outrage if the GP said 'EWWWW' and left the room!