Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be really bloody angry about this

185 replies

ingeniousidiot · 24/04/2016 12:18

My DS10 and 3 friends won a prize of a day trip to a local theme park travelling by coach. Three of the parents were happy (with mild concerns) to let the kids enjoy it as their first grown up day trip. One decided that she wanted her dh to trail the kids all day. AIBU to be pissed off that he is essentially changing the dynamics of the group and the presence of the DH standing in the queues behind them completely changes their day?

Adding a bit of background information - the prize gave the option of an open day ticket to allow the winners to go whenever with whoever, or to go on the organised, supervised coach trip. The DH didn't want to go, the other parents didn't want him to go. The DH has said that he will not be responsible for the other children.
AIBU in thinking that she should've chosen the open day ticket and made it a family trip another time, rather than our children being stalked for the day?

OP posts:
BrickInTheWall · 24/04/2016 13:55

I would consider myself pretty laid back but theres no way I would let my DD go to a theme park all day. My DD is going to be 10 in October and she is allowed to roam around with her friends within an agreed parameter and has to check in every two hours as she doesnt have a phone. But all day in a huge theme park where they could start feeling sick from rides or getting pushed about by older kids/adults in the line.. I would definitely have volunteered to accompany.

charliethebear · 24/04/2016 14:16

Surely a first day trip is the bus into town 10/20 minutes away not to a theme park? Theme parks can be very overwhelming, what if a child was sick or something? Which is quite likely with all the sweets/fast food available and spinny rides? Surely you should be grateful a known adult will be there? I went to theme parks with friends and a 'stalker parent' so many times when I was younger and the parents in no way hindered my enjoyment of the day.

curren · 24/04/2016 14:27

Yabu.

A parent has changed their mind.

Get over it

Original poster
ingeniousidiot · 24/04/2016 14:41

I really had no idea that so many of you would not let your child visit a theme park without being there yourself. The trip IS SUPERVISED - a bit like a school trip where teachers take the children, but in this case it is the police. If you want to trail your child on a school/supervised trip then fair enough, but I find that a bit bloody odd to be honest.

Smiling summed it how I see it

The other mother is changing the terms of the trip - it's obviously fine for her to not want her child being unaccompanied, but then she should have accepted the 'open' tickets, not agreed to her child going on the organised trip and then deciding that her partner will accompany the trip. She doesn't get to make that decision for OP and the other parents who are comfortable with the 'original' arrangements.

OP posts:
MissBattleaxe · 24/04/2016 14:49

YABU. I'd be relieved and grateful that another adult I knew was going. He's hardly going to be following them around shouting orders and ruining their day. I don't get your anger at all.

Children mature at different rates. One sensible 10 year could have a very immature 10 year old friend the same age. Just because you're trusting your son, perhaps the other boy is less able to be left or has a track record of making a run for it or missing coaches or something.

Costacoffeeplease · 24/04/2016 14:51

It's the 'really bloody angry' bit - mildly annoyed maybe, but really bloody angry - really?

CremeEggThief · 24/04/2016 14:53

Eh? 10 is a bit young to go on a day trip to a theme park without any adult supervision. YABU.

CremeEggThief · 24/04/2016 14:55

Sorry, I see it is supervised, but not by any adults well known by the children, so I still think YABU.

rookiemere · 24/04/2016 14:59

Ds is 10. There is zero chance I'd let him spend the day without adult supervision at a theme park.he wouldn't want the responsibility anyway.
Personally I think you're lucky there will be an adult there.

MummyBex1985 · 24/04/2016 14:59

Hell would freeze over before I let my 10 yo on that kind of trip unsupervised, and ahes very sensible and independent.

YABU. Children that age should be supervised and if a parent wants to supervise their child and rightly so then "group dynamics" isn't a reason to complain about him wanting to do so.

curren · 24/04/2016 15:01

So people aren't allowed to change their mind now?

OTheHugeManatee · 24/04/2016 15:02

YANBU to be irritated at the parents being so protective that they don't trust the police (!) to do a decent job of supervising some 10yos on a coach trip and insist on sending daddy to trail after them as well. I agree that it's OTT and having a parent there watching them makes for a different dynamic than having some coppers they've never met before doing so. But 'really bloody angry' is maybe a bit OTT. You'll have plenty of chances to teach independence.

SaucyJack · 24/04/2016 15:02

OK. Basically you've made a decision re; your own child, and you're annoyed that this other family are able to override it whether you agree to it or not.

That is annoying in theory, yes. Agreed.

However, unless a theme park means something very different where you are- then your decision was a bit shit in the first place. I still can't work out who's organising trip, or why you think it's supervised.

Is there someone like the Scouts or the Lions club or whatevs behind it?

agentmarmalade · 24/04/2016 15:03

I would not mind one of my kids friends dads going along and being at a distance, unless he was a total creep or something.

MangoUnchained · 24/04/2016 15:04

OP - are the supervising police going to be chaperoning individual groups, or are they only on hand at set help points? I think that makes a difference, tbh.

TheWitTank · 24/04/2016 15:06

YABU. I wouldn't want my 10 year old dd going on a trip supervised by a load of people I didn't know from Adam. She goes to pony club and school trips with people I know, but not with a load of strangers. Ten IS still fairly young and they can still be silly and not see dangers/look after their money/get lost/be naive. I took a group of ten year old to a wildlife park at half term and one got stuck in a bloody zip wire meant for under 7's. Literally wedged in the seat. I had to haul them out by the armpits and it wasn't easy! The bloody angry bit is one hell of an overreaction !

ParadiseCity · 24/04/2016 15:06

It sounds more like a school trip than a normal theme park day. I'd be slightly miffed I think about the gate crashing dad. My DS is going on a residential soon which his three best mates parents have volunteered for so now it'll be more like 3 families plus DS and it does change the dynamic. I am disappointed but nothing I can do about it.

AngieBolen · 24/04/2016 15:11

So how would the supervised day with the police work? Would there be a police officer assigned to a group of children for the day? Would they be at the end if the ride incase a child came off feeling nautous? Would they advise a 10yo maybe they shouldn't have only seven ice creams for lunch?

My 10yo old will be going on the bus to school in 6months time, but I wouldn't want her without a known adult at a theme park for a whole day. but then she gave her TA the slip on the last school trip she went on to go and do more interesting stuff. The TA may have calmed done now

MyLocal · 24/04/2016 15:16

Saucy jack, I have only scan read this thread, and the OP has said several times it is an organised trip supervised by the local police. It has been advertised as such,, how can you ask such silly questions before reading the OP and PP subsequent comments.

OP YANBU, I totally get what you are saying.

SisterMoonshine · 24/04/2016 15:16

I'd have to know more about the set up of the organised trip: safeguarding, risk assessments, numbers etc. Because it does sound like they were offerring the alternative tickets because they're not really expecting 10year olds to go unaccompanied.

Also, some DCs are more savvy than others. My DD at 10 wouldn't be able to cope with a theme park alone - because never really been to one. If the dad goes, the boy gets to still go with his friends, rather than seperately.
You sound mean.

EarthboundMisfit · 24/04/2016 15:21

10 would be too young for me.

shazzarooney99 · 24/04/2016 15:29

These are children, they are 10 years old, you think its fine to let them walk around a theme park unsupervised? Dam well right id be there supervising them!

thecatfromjapan · 24/04/2016 15:31

Am I Being Unreasonable to find this thread very funny?

OP - I am going to post to solicit a range of opinions.

Mumsnetters proffer opinions.

OP - No! No! No! I rage against the opinions proffered that differ from my own. I am angry!!!! People disagreeing are wrong, I tell you! Or you cannot read!

Honestly, OP, you need to pace yourself. I'd hate to see you when your car gets clamped!

Janeymoo50 · 24/04/2016 15:32

Ten year olds at a theme park need supervision in my view (which park by the way??)....

SaucyJack · 24/04/2016 15:36

"Saucy jack, I have only scan read this thread, and the OP has said several times it is an organised trip supervised by the local police. It has been advertised as such,, how can you ask such silly questions before reading the OP and PP subsequent comments."

But that's the bit I don't get. Is this in the UK?

Where do you live where the idea of the local old bill taking a coach load of kids out for the day to Chessington or whatever just for shits and giggles seems like a likely thing to happen? Balamory?

Who's actually paying for and organising it?