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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be really bloody angry about this

185 replies

ingeniousidiot · 24/04/2016 12:18

My DS10 and 3 friends won a prize of a day trip to a local theme park travelling by coach. Three of the parents were happy (with mild concerns) to let the kids enjoy it as their first grown up day trip. One decided that she wanted her dh to trail the kids all day. AIBU to be pissed off that he is essentially changing the dynamics of the group and the presence of the DH standing in the queues behind them completely changes their day?

Adding a bit of background information - the prize gave the option of an open day ticket to allow the winners to go whenever with whoever, or to go on the organised, supervised coach trip. The DH didn't want to go, the other parents didn't want him to go. The DH has said that he will not be responsible for the other children.
AIBU in thinking that she should've chosen the open day ticket and made it a family trip another time, rather than our children being stalked for the day?

OP posts:

VimFuego101 · 24/04/2016 12:39

I think 10 is pretty young to be doing that sort of thing. I would be glad that the DH was going - even if he said he wasn't there to look after the other kids I'm sure he would step up if there was an emergency.

expatinscotland · 24/04/2016 12:40

YABU. I have a 10-year-old and would not want her running round a theme park with 3 mates on her own with no adult there. They're not 'grown ups'. There's plenty of time to build up to that.

Original poster

ingeniousidiot · 24/04/2016 12:40

I'm angry because there was two options - take a ticket and visit with friends/family OR do the day trip with supervision. They're age 10/11 and need to start doing things independantly - they're all getting on buses and going to secondary school in September. My DS was really looking forward to his first trip without parents and I'm cross that it's been taken away from him.

OP posts:

NickiFury · 24/04/2016 12:40

I think ten is too young. I don't blame them. YABU.

OurBlanche · 24/04/2016 12:41

or to go on the organised, supervised coach trip so the trip is supervised by the local police... so no, YANBU that one mum is overridding everyone elses plans/wishes for the day, especially given that there is an alternative an open day ticket to allow the winners to go whenever with whoever

Or am I the only one who read the OP fully?

Lasaraleen · 24/04/2016 12:43

Don't theme parks usually have a rule that all children must be accompanied? I'm not sure what they count as a child but we go to Legoland fairly often and I've never seen a group of 10 year olds walking round by themselves.

I have a nearly 10 yo ds and wouldn't be happy with him unsupervised all day. Off with his friends for an hour with a time and place to meet again, maybe.

Original poster

ingeniousidiot · 24/04/2016 12:45

In the OP I said the trip was SUPERVISED, and quitelikely - yes he said that to one of the other parents, I thought it was a bit odd too.

OP posts:

PPie10 · 24/04/2016 12:45

You might think your child is a big, grown adult but he is part of a group and a parent doesn't feel comfortable. Not your place to dictate what others should do. As you can see by the responses many people feel the same as the parent accompanying the children.

thecatfromjapan · 24/04/2016 12:46

Nope. I've read it too.

I assume child wants to go with mates, who are going on the organised trip.

Parent of one child has offered to go too.

I often volunteer as a chaperone on organised trips. As I said, the experience of my dh has led to my valuing my services as a chaperone.

I'm pretty good, too. I think I'm skilled at not cramping my children's style, whilst keeping an eye open.

Original poster

ingeniousidiot · 24/04/2016 12:47

ourblanche, yes, I think you are!

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 24/04/2016 12:47

My DS was really looking forward to his first trip without parents and I'm cross that it's been taken away from him.

Oh go away has it been taken away from him.

There will be other adults supervising from afar anyway, so one more won't make a difference.

Incidentally, if your child got off a ride with his nose pouring with blood for example, would you be angry if the parent comforted him and took him to the first aid post?

I bet you'd be fuming if he didn't....

Lasaraleen · 24/04/2016 12:48

Sorry, may have misread the OP. If there is actually an adult with them going round the park i'd be much happier.

Bambambini · 24/04/2016 12:49

How much supervision will the police supply? Are they just randomly on site or actually accompanying and supervising groups of kids?

ThenLaterWhenItGotDark · 24/04/2016 12:51

How kind of him.

Trecking along behind a bunch of kids running riot in a theme park must rank as belonging to Dante's 7th circle.

Perhaps he refused to look after the other kids as well because they're badly behaved usually..perhaps that's why he's going.

Who knows.

or cares

But yes, absolutely YABU and a bit irresponsible really. Dd is 12 and she won't be going on any coach trip (supervised or otherwise) on her own with her mates anytime soon.

thecatfromjapan · 24/04/2016 12:51

It will still be a trip for your ds without his parents.

It would never be a trip without adult supervision, would it? And chances are, those adults would be someone's parents.

You are making your child sound like Violet Beautegarde, with you as a somewhat over-involved enabler of a spoilt brat.

I think you should remind your child that winning the prize is a lucky thing and that it is now his role to be grateful, sociable, and enjoy the trip as it is - not as he demands it should be.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 24/04/2016 12:51

YABU.

10 is too young.

MsMommie · 24/04/2016 12:51

YABU

I wouldn't let my 10 year old go unsupervised.
Why would you be so angry about an adult ensuring the safety of their child?

WeAllHaveWings · 24/04/2016 12:52

The friend obviously wants to go with his friends, his parents think he is too young to go without more supervision which is their decision and not unreasonable at only 10 in a theme park. the dh tagging along to keep an eye out is a reasonable compromise.

YABVU, you have no right to question their parenting decisions and getting angry is a complete over reaction.

OurBlanche · 24/04/2016 12:52

Bambambini, thses days I think it would be safe to assume that any organised, supervised trip will be in full accordance wth all the safeguarding guidelines... even if it were not being organised by the police!

WorraLiberty · 24/04/2016 12:53

Oh the irony OurBlanche

You're talking about a 'Mum' overriding and yet you're asking if you're the only one who's read the OP properly?

OurBlanche · 24/04/2016 12:55

Dd is 12 and she won't be going on any coach trip (supervised or otherwise) on her own with her mates anytime soon. not even school trips? Scouts? Guides? Local Roller Derby? Poor kid!

ThenLaterWhenItGotDark · 24/04/2016 12:56

Obviously there will be a lot of adults supervising anyway if the children are all going to be as young as the OPs. So why she's losing her shit over some kind bugger wanting to go and help out as well is beyond me.

The police will, of course, be aware of the NSPCC's recommendations and have 1 adult per 8 if the children are the same age as the OPs, and of course will have both female and male supervisors in that mix. So Junior is hardly likely to be experiencing his first Lord of the Flies awayday.

Merd · 24/04/2016 12:57

But ... "Really bloody angry"? Really? Of all the things to be cross about ... Do you feel that they're judging you or something?

ThenLaterWhenItGotDark · 24/04/2016 12:57

Obviously she goes on school trips. Some abroad. I meant to be allowed to run around in theme parks.

OurBlanche · 24/04/2016 12:57

Why irony, Worra? I was simply wondering, asking a question. Or is it because I am disagreeing with you, even if not specifically? I don't understadnd why that should bother you so much as to need a slightly odd, nonsensical comment!

And, to be precise, given my new key board, that one mum is 'overidding'

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