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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To refuse to watch friends ds play football

38 replies

SingingOutOfTune · 20/04/2016 23:39

AIBU to find absurd when a friend gets upset for me not being interested in going to watch her DS play football Sundays morning? She keeps inviting me even when I already mentioned that I don't even watch my own children play for more than 15minutes ?

OP posts:
WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 20/04/2016 23:40

Just tell her you are "busy" on a Sunday morning Wink

Scarydinosaurs · 20/04/2016 23:41

Qualify 'upset'?

What does she actually say?

BackforGood · 20/04/2016 23:55

Regardless of whether or not you like football - who has the time or inclination to be going to watch other people's dc take part in their activities. We have to work out a complicated system just to get dc to activities sometimes, without factoring then staying to watch.

Original poster
SingingOutOfTune · 21/04/2016 00:04

She brought it up in a group conversation as if I was being a bad friend...I really don't get it...

OP posts:
Faye12345 · 21/04/2016 00:12

Shes mad. Hes not your child!

Charlesroi · 21/04/2016 00:12

She doesn't want to go either, but she does want someone to chat with if she does have to go.

fatmomma99 · 21/04/2016 00:13

Why don't you watch your own child for more than 15 mins?

Itinerary · 21/04/2016 00:17

YANBU. She could take an iPod and listen to music, the radio or podcasts instead.

Original poster
SingingOutOfTune · 21/04/2016 00:18

I work and have lots to do...And don't enjoy standing in the cold/ rain/wind.

OP posts:
ThumbWitchesAbroad · 21/04/2016 00:19

God that's mad. I don't go to watch my DS play football either, hate the very idea of it, I'd certainly not go to watch a friend's child play instead! Apart from anything else, it would be very upsetting for DS if I did that! He gets that I'm not interested in footie, but would be happy if I went to watch along with DH and MIL - occasionally I give in but mostly don't - but he'd be really really upset if I chose to watch another child play instead of him. :(

PleasePleasePleaseMN · 21/04/2016 00:26

yanbu Confused

fatmomma99 · 21/04/2016 00:39

No one enjoys standing in the cold/rain/wind (and way, way worse) but not watching your child for more than 15 mins? I'm Shock Confused

MattDillonsPants · 21/04/2016 01:19

Gosh YANBU she sounds a bit loopy.

Original poster
SingingOutOfTune · 21/04/2016 01:26

Why fatmomma99? They know I love and admire them. We talk after the game about their wonderful goals I even understand the offside rule 😊 I don't think they need my eyes on them to know that are valued.

OP posts:
VimFuego101 · 21/04/2016 01:28

What Charlesroi said.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 21/04/2016 01:37

How can she possibly imagine, even if her wildest batshit crazy dream was having its bat wildest batshit crazy dream, that. You'd want to go and watch her child play football on a Sunday Morning or all days.
You've got no qualms not watching your own child play football, well. You're certainly not going to have any qualms not watching her DS.

TheSolitaryWanderer · 21/04/2016 05:06

Are you a teacher? Sometimes people expect batshit things of teachers, even when you aren't in school. Grin

2rebecca · 21/04/2016 05:33

I'm not a stand and watch kids do sport either. We are quite a sporty family but none of us much in to standing watching it. I have watched hockey games cycle races etc but often watch part of them unless important. The kids don't care and as they got older preferred not to be watched any way. They have no interest in watching us

TippyTappyLappyToppy · 21/04/2016 05:45

She's a loon. Its bad enough having to watch your own kids play tedious sports - why on earth would you give up precious weekend time to watch someone else's? Hmm

Is it that she's single and all the other kids are there with both parents or their dads? Does she feel like she needs a plus one?

Janecc · 21/04/2016 06:03

So you work and she wants you to give up 25% of your free time to watch her kid on a wet, windy pitch?!! Because you don't need to spend time with your family, clean, rest, do the washing etc. So sure yabu not to have stapled her mouth shut. ;))

Clandestino · 21/04/2016 06:04

Your friend is a loon.

curren · 21/04/2016 06:12

Is this friend your partner?

I get that she probably isn't. I just can't get my head round why anyone would even expect a friend to do this.

My kids compete At sport. I haven't even thought of inviting my friends to come and watch. I go (it's indoors), even I get bored.

Silvercatowner · 21/04/2016 06:15

Why don't you watch your own child for more than 15 mins?

Perhaps OPs kids aren't precious flowers who need mummy to watch their every move to feel validated?

Schwabischeweihnachtskanne · 21/04/2016 06:22

Wow!

I had two doing football at one point with both often playing in different places at the same time. We had a complicated car pool going... Now only one plays but he is quite obsessed - training 3 week evenings and usually a match at the weekend. He likes me to watch and I do if I'm on car pool driving duty as it usually isn't worth going elsewhere, and having seen a 10 year old goal keeper knocked out cold a couple of years ago I don't like him to have nobody there... but if a friend is doing the car pool I don't go (I work two weekends a month anyway and if I am home and not the driver I have other kids too!)

Does your friend's entire world revolve around her DS by any chance? Some people do seem to get the wonderfulness of their offspring a bit out of perspective... Some people are like that with other things too (expecting a high level of engagement with their own fanatical hobby or even pets).

Kelandry · 21/04/2016 06:22

Agree with pp who said she wants a buddy to chat to, or just a body to stand with her so she doesn't look like a billy no mates. Does she have issues with confidence?