There is a silent war going on in my house

[OTheHugeManatee]

Whenever I hang a new loo roll I do it so the loose sheet hangs away from the wall as this is obviously correct. Then DH turns it round so the loose sheet hangs by the wall. So I change it back, and DH turns it round again. Every single time.

He has to be doing it deliberately. I should LTB, shouldn't I?

My loo roll holder is vertical and the loose end is better tucked behind than trailing in front for practical reasons. I don't know why it's vertical, maybe DH fixed it that way to avoid conflict?

DH and I have a similar silent war so I can relate to you OP.

We have fairy lights going along the inglenook. Every morning DH switches them on, I switch them off but every time I go into the room he has switched them back on!

We both work from home, so we are it all day!

OP you are 100% right.

YANBU. Front dangle all the way!

I know you are right, but I prefer it the other way, everyone in our house is too lazy to even replace the toilet roll so I have it my way, your DH's way.

bakeoff - you need ones that flash ON-OFF-ON-OFF as a compromise!

I used to work at a place were someone used to turn the paper to the wall and the holder meant the paper was touching the wall. The only thing was the wall paint was flakey and more than once I got bloody paint flakes down my nails

Front dangling is the only way.
the silent war in our house is that no matter how many times I stack the baking trays and dishes for the oven in their box in the cupboard whenever anyone uses them and puts them away after being washed they stick them by the side of the box or balanced on top because they are too LAZY ARSED to pull the box out and put them back where they belong

Hanging at the front is the only way!

Next time please do a little origami something or other with a face drawn on the inside!

I turn it to wall. The friction prevents children pulling off ridiculous amounts with a small tug. I need one of those dispensers in public toilets where you can only get 1 square at a time.

Remove all the toilet paper from the house and keep your own stash. After a few days reintroduce the TP one roll at a time, being prepared to repeat the process until the complaining/reversing the paper stops.

Remove all the toilet paper from the house and keep your own stash. After a few days reintroduce the TP one roll
at a time, being prepared to repeat the process until the complaining/reversing the paper stops.

Carefully unroll a section of toilet roll. On the inside bit of the roll (IYSWIM), write "Mr Manatee is a massive bell-end", then carefully roll it back up and put the roll on the holder the correct way round (which is paper AWAY from the wall).

When he turns it round to the INCORRECT way and starts pulling off sheets, your sweary love notes will be revealed.

Keep doing this, upping the ante with the insults every time.

Then LTB.

DadDadDad no I hate flashy lights and I'm trying to save money. DH is a real spender. That extra 2p an hour for the lights really adds up

Shades of Gulliver's Travels and the Bigendians and the Littlendians!

Two big-roll holders would be cheaper than the £550 it now costs to issue a divorce petition.

• Or even bog-roll

Answer, hide the loo rolls.

You are correct.
Your OH is a knob.

And you should lock the loo roll with a combination lock.

You are correct.
However.....in this house, when the roll is hung correctly it lasts 2 days (Charmin) or 2.75 days (Andrex). When it is hung incorrectly any roll lasts 4 days.
It is my theory (and I think I shall base my PhD on it) that the slowing velocity that the wall provides to the whizzing-round roll causes the user to avail themselves of only 5 sheets for the task in hand. Whereas the resulting wheeeeee of the roll when pulled from the correct position results in an average usage of 7 sheets per go.
The theory stands so long as there are no puppies around.

TotalConfucius - It might be increased friction making the loo roll last longer. BUT it might also be people so revolted by using loo roll that's been in contact with a potentially poo spore covered wall that they just shake to dry instead

Loo roll in use sits on the cisturn here, holder is used for next roll. No one else in this house even fetches loo roll from the cupboard, even when it is down to the last sheet on the cardboard

It took 12 months for dh to put the lid back on the loo - I bought a beautiful new posh walnut seat, lid wouldn't stay up on it's own (fine by me ) so dh took it off until he could rejig replace the hinges he'd broken.

We have similar wars but we compromised.

I use the ensuite so the roll is hung correctly. Away from the wall.
OH uses the downstairs loo so the loo roll is wherever he's lobbed it after use.

You would think that we have an Andrex puppy the number of times I've walked past the door and seen it strewn across the floor. (surely he doesn't want to wipe his arse with something that's been across the floor?)

And that brings me to another thing. Why can't he close doors?

Hint to discourage those that yank yards of loo roll off.
Before putting loo roll on spindle, squeeze the roll to flatten it slightly so that the central core is now oval instead of round.
This slows the yank.

O/t but I can't resist it.

Our loo is four steps below the living area of the flat, half way up the stairs.

When new bog rolls are brought upstairs one of them chucks them into the loo and cries Bombs away, Skipper while the other sings the Dambusters' March.

We are 63 and 62 and we're damned if we are going to start growing up at our time of life!

DadDadDad Fair enough!