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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed by "I need a favour but have to ask you face to face"

953 replies

Eastie77 · 06/04/2016 18:35

I think IABU but anyway...it's annoying me.

A relative sent me a text message stating she needs to pop round and ask me for a favour. It has to be this week and she asked when I'm free. I have a really busy week with various bits and bobs arranged for the kids, appointments etc. I replied the only times that are convenient would be this evening or early Saturday morning before we leave on a weekend break with the kids. I asked if she could give me a call to discuss the favour. She just replied "Ok see you Saturday". I asked again re. the call and she said no, she has to ask me face to face.

I hate this cloak and dagger shit. Just tell me what you need! If it's something awkward I'd rather she asked over the phone tbh. She lives about 40mins away on the bus (doesn't drive) and I mentioned we will be leaving early on Saturday and she'll have to get up early to get here. As this didn't dissuade her I'm guessing it's something important but what and why can't she ask over the phone?? I am not close to this relative btw.

I will feel bad if it's something 'serious' but at the moment I'm just pissed off as we will be sitting around waiting for her to get here on Saturday before we have to set off on a longish drive.

Anyway. Rant over.

OP posts:
Jubaloo442 · 08/04/2016 14:58

I've set an alarm to remind me to come back at 10.30 for The Big Reveal.

Yes, be in PJs with an empty wine bottle on desk as that may give you license to openly laugh in her face as she whips out the shit makeup / aloe Vera products.

Also I should be in the gym but am sitting in the car park catching up on this.

Jubaloo442 · 08/04/2016 14:59

Desk?!?! I mean table. Sigh...

Stormtreader · 08/04/2016 14:59

Guarantor for a loan is my guess, all her other relatives have turned her down and your name has come up as the next target - needs to be in person so she can do the "but youre my last hope, without this loan Ill be on the streets!"

trufflesnout · 08/04/2016 15:01

We haven't had a thread of this calibre in ages. This is a Good Thread

ProcrastinatorGeneral · 08/04/2016 15:02

I have to say I'm impressed by the inability of your relative to pick up on the fact she's really being a pain in the bum.

Best of luck tonight.

VagueIdeas · 08/04/2016 15:03

Well, I'm fascinated Grin

MissesBloom · 08/04/2016 15:05

But she's invited herself round to op's home (a home with an infant) at 10:30 at night!? I don't see how this isn't crazy behaviour? I'd be in bed by that time...I'm sure if it was that serious she could actually say how urgent it was. She is being deliberately evasive! Shes basically told op nothing. I think it's really really rude no matter how you look at it. If something serious she is wanting to drop it on op before she goes away Confused

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 08/04/2016 15:05

We haven't had a thread of this calibre in ages. This is a Good Thread

Ay, and on a Friday as well. I'm braced for a massive anti-climax, mind Grin

I voting 70% possibility of Aloe Shite, 30% property repairs.

Sparkletastic · 08/04/2016 15:08

I'm going to have to decrease my Friday night Wine consumption to remain conscious until past 10.30pm. This is a major sacrifice on my part.

iamtheblackwizards · 08/04/2016 15:09

Hopefully it is sales, instead of something grim like needing a body part, or being seriously ill.

GrandMarmoset · 08/04/2016 15:17

Right. I've been pondering this, instead of working. The fact that she appears to have the confidence to piss you off and the fact that, whatever it is, only requires a few minutes, I think it must be something nice. I'm voting for lottery win or inheritance.

FreakinScaryCaaw · 08/04/2016 15:18

Very intriguing.

iamtheblackwizards · 08/04/2016 15:19

Unless you've done something wrong, my mum used to do it when I was a teen randomly. "We need to talk later". Shit, I've been caught

Lulioli · 08/04/2016 15:22

Not long to wait now...this better be good!! 😊

MrsTerryPratchett · 08/04/2016 15:26

I'm in a different time zone so could anyone set up alarms for me to remind me when 10.30pm Friday night and 11am Saturday morning are? [lazy] Thanks x

SfaOkaySuperFurryAnimals · 08/04/2016 15:31

10.30 that's after my bedtime, its 10pm at the weekend, I am 39😞 need my sleep. Awh, will this ever end? What rime is her bus home after the reveal ? Hope she's not asking for her bfh too? ...

LatinForTelly · 08/04/2016 15:47

The fact that she appears to have the confidence to piss you off ...

Or, GrandMarmoset, it could be something terrible.

lotsoffunandgames · 08/04/2016 15:47

I don't understand why this relative is being slagged off so much.she isn't being a bully.she asked simply to see op face to face.she isn't known as being a drama queen or anything.I always try to help people, especially a relative. I am quite happy to help people out or to make someone's life easier. this thread makes most posters appear to be very selfish, self-centred and mean. So judgemental when you don't know the full facts. One poster said why would you let her use your laptop, can't she go to the library! Seriously, it's so hard to let a friend or relative use a laptop? Perhaps having a catch up at the same time? You all seemed to give fuel to op's initial (unnecessary) annoyance and turned it into outright anger.poor lady.

nanetterose · 08/04/2016 15:50

When is the friend visiting?

If it is tonight , why would there be an up-date?

If it isn't, I apologize.

nanetterose · 08/04/2016 15:52

lotsof I am inclined to agree with you.

The whole thread is a bit bitter to read actually.

BoatyMcBoat · 08/04/2016 15:52

Hmmm, well, I think she wants to leave you her house, but doesn't know whether you'd want it or she has some proviso about you having it like not selling it ever; and then we'll all feel tremendously guilty because she's being so generous. Blush

OVienna · 08/04/2016 15:53

If she were poorly I don't think she'd be on a bus travelling through London at 10.30 pm for a visit lasting "a few minutes." I have no clue what she could want that she couldn't give the OP ANY context whatsoever over the phone prior and is suggesting these meeting times. If it's a document to sign wouldn't you just say?

theymostlycomeatnight · 08/04/2016 15:53

Wow, cannot wait for the big reveal.

In seriousness though, I do hope it is something that can be resolved and there is a positive outcome whatever the situation actually is...

runningincircles12 · 08/04/2016 15:58

I agree with you, lotsoffunandgames. It's pretty horrible the way people are talking about her. I would be mortified and gutted if I were the relative. Of course she isn't asking to come round so that she can sell Aloe Vera juice. She is only suggesting awkward times because the OP is trying to make matters difficult and saying that she is only available at those times. It's quite sad that people are that self-centred that they would not be inconvenienced a tiny bit to help someone out. It seems like it's something important to the relative, so I would want to help her and try to accommodate her.

mrschatty · 08/04/2016 16:04

Is the big reveal tonight? Shameless placemarm

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