Mother's have it tough

[Zenab1]

Hello mothers, so I had an incident which left me humiliated and angry today. I went to Chatham House, a policy institution in central london to attend a talk that was happening there. When I get to the conference hall, I was told that I was not allowed to get in with my buggy in which my baby girl was peaceful sleeping. Their main excuse was, it's gonna block the way in case people need to evacuate for emergency. I said but this information is not communicated anywhere on your website and I even called to double check and the person I spoke to said you are mother friendly. Anyway, they insisted that I leave the building because they won't let me in. I got so emotional and told them that was unfair as I came from a long way and the whole thing seemed to me some kind of discrimination. They escorted me out and told me that I should complain if I like to by sending an email. I felt so humiliated and degraded. Do you think this was right ladies, it happening in this day and age and in one of the worlds developed countries, that a mum should be mistreated like this for simple being mum?

but to be honest, I am sure they would not have let me even if I suggested.

You don't know that if you didn't ask. And anyway, you can't just take babies wherever you want just because you want to.

Was there a place to leave the buggy. You can't cite womens rights as a reason to block emergency exits, but you can campaign for places to be more accessible for parents by providing buggy stores. Lot's of women's/feminist meetings have creche facilities in recognition that women are generally the primary care givers and mothers of young children would be indirectly excluded if there was no childcare. It would be good if other public meeting type places could adopt this rather than the default of mothers of young children not attending things. Until that happens though, you need to either miss out or organise your own sitter.

Sure, in the next event, I'll turn up with my ergobaby. Fingers crossed I'll be let in and it's nothing to do with the baby's presence.

I go to RIIA a lot: I can confidently say that I have never seen a child at Chatham House - it's not really a child-friendly sort of venue in that sense. Mainly because, oh, I don't know - people don't usually take their children to professional research-based seminars? (I've also never had someone bring their child into any of my lectures, if that helps set it into context for you.)

It's not about being discriminated against - it's about what's appropriate and, more importantly, what conforms to fire regs. For your future reference, it's really very rarely appropriate to take children to professional events. Or, for that matter, the opera.

You could always ring ahead to check next time.

I missed what you thought your grounds for a discrimination allegation were?

i think the op lives under a ........Bridg.

I did ring and they told me it was ok initially. They changed their tune once I got there.

I'm so distressed and feel humiliated and angry this post appeared on the "trending" section. Thank goodness it's people telling you how ridiculous you are!

Yes well when you ring for next time explain what happened this time.

The content of the lecture is irrelevant, do none of you take kids to places they might accidentally disturb other people? Libraries? Cafes? there must have been SOMEWHERE in the theatre you could have parked your buggy. They were being dickheads.

Usually there isn't a lecture going on in a cafe or library. Those aren't comparable situations duck.

Like PurpleDaisies I'm still wondering what grounds you have for alleging discrimination.

Btw I posted this here to share my experience and how I felt about it with other woman and I do appreciate all your opinions and advice but there is no need to be verbally abusive. Thank you.

Who has been abusive? You should report anything you think is a personal attack. People are allowed to disagree with you...

All I can think of is that means they are wheelchair unfriendly which is BLOODY AWFUL for a place like that. You should complain. They should have access (and I don't think it's unreasonable of you to have gone, only unreasonable if your baby would have been a big disturbance)

Eh? I posted a photo which clearly showed that they are wheelchair friendly.

I don't see how people have been verbally abusive either.

time a poster upthread says there's a ramp for wheelchairs.

It's just the few that called me ridiculous. I think that is quiet unnecessary but most of you are great with very reasonable questions and suggestions. Thank you.

I'm not seeing anyone being nasty
And wheelchairs and buggies arent really the same are they. Let's be honest. And I say that as a mum to a 7 year old, a 2 year old and a 7 month old.

Well, you are being ridiculous. that's not abusive, that's just letting you know how ridiculous what you have posted is.

I was going to post of course YABU. It's not discriminating against mothers or women in general - I'm sure your dh (or oh?) would have got exactly the same response.

And I still don't want to feel bad about trying to live my life as a normal as I can and enjoying things I have always enjoyed including attending talk, lectures, etc but I guess making few adjustments are most now that the baby is around because reality is different from assumption. Anyway, heading to bed now. Good night and thank you all.

You are being so overly dramatic!

There must have been SOMEWHERE in the theatre you could have parked your buggy.

Why? It's a lecture theatre with limited space. Why on earth would they take seats out to make provision for a buggy when there is, quite simply, always an alternative to taking a buggy in.