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Original poster

To tell his gf ?

153 replies

Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 14:03

Been sleeping with this guy on and off for a year and a bit , yep you guessed it he has a gf ( or maybe a few he gets around ) I feel very angry about how he has treated me and I'm wondering do I tell his gf? She deserves to know what he is , and I suspect she left her husband to start relationship with aforementioned guy. Wibu to tell her?

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Binders1 · 15/03/2016 16:25

Ahh so that's what this is all about - he's blocked you.

It's not the fact that he had a gf, it's because he doesn't want to have further contact with you.

You are better off without him op! Please realise this.

Pinkheart5915 · 15/03/2016 16:27

This is all because he's now blocked your number

Just leave things, forget him and move on

WeveGotAHomelessLove · 15/03/2016 16:34

Why do feel the need to tell everyone your 'very attractive' and 'above average' in all your threads? Its just weird Biscuit

DropYourSword · 15/03/2016 16:35

I think you need to examine your motives very carefully and be honest with yourself.

ShesEverSoFamous · 15/03/2016 16:36

Regardless of what this man has or hasn't done OP, think very carefully about what you do with those videos and pictures. Revenge porn is illegal, even if you only send it to his gf.

Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 16:37

Yes binders another new gf! And I'm saying I'm worth more I'm not blowing my own trumpet so to speak. And he was only my 2nd partner so I'm not promiscuous either.. I deserve so much better... Just saying ... He even said it too once or twice

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Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 16:39

Ok I won't send the pics/vids it isn't fair I suppose ... I just don't know how else I can confirm to her what we've done... What am I supposed to do tell her what colour the bedroom curtains are or something ?!

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ShesEverSoFamous · 15/03/2016 16:41

Why do you have to prove anything? If you decide to tell her then your part is done, what she does with the information is up to her.

Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 16:43

Ok I'll tell her the facts. Then he will lie through his teeth.. Make out I'm a liar ... Whole thing waste of time ...

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ShesEverSoFamous · 15/03/2016 16:46

If she believes him then that's up to her, I've known of women who catch their partner in the act and still deny what has happened! You really do need to forget about him and her and move on with your own life.

Binders1 · 15/03/2016 16:50

Kimberley - but the only reason why you want to tell this gf is because he has blocked you. Otherwise, surely you would have felt the same way about telling the other gf and not sleeping with him again.

He is a cheater and a weirdo and he has lot of casual sex/gf's.

goldensquirrel · 15/03/2016 16:50

How old are you? You sound like you have plenty of time to find someone a million times better.

You could write her a letter but personally I'd leave it.

Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 16:53

I'm mid 30s golden squirrel

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theycallmemellojello · 15/03/2016 16:57

I once got an email out of the blue from a guy whose wife had been having an affair with my DP. It wasn't nice to read but I was glad he did. I think the danger is that the gf wants to engage with you. I'd keep it clear and factual, say that you thought she ought to know but that you're not interested in following up. It could be really draining and horrible to get involved in a back and forth with her, especially if she gets irrationally angry at you.

goldensquirrel · 15/03/2016 17:05

It sounds like your life is going places with the university course place and I would focus on that positive side of your life. His video sounds quite disturbing unless I've just led a sheltered life and I'd imagine that pursuing this would be very messy. It will make you feel worse not better.

lighteningirl · 15/03/2016 17:06

it's another new gf then he hasn't really cheated on anyone lots of people have a more relaced period at the start of relationships. You are a booty call that has got seriously annoying get over yourself he's blocked you just get on with your own life. Next time pick a man you want t a relationship and take things slower men don't owe you a relationship because they've slept with you you need to work on your self esteem and pick nicer men.

Babylove2015 · 15/03/2016 17:09

I don't see you telling the gf as then he would dump you for good. And you're desperate to hold onto him at all costs. The thing is he is very aware of how desperate you are and the ball is in his court.

If you want a happy future and desire to be in a happy, stable, loving relationship. I suggest you get some therapy and work out what it is that attracts you to men like this that keep you at a distance and use you. And why you thrive on the drama and attention.

If for whatever reason you can't get yourself into therapy. You need to get to a library and start reading lots of relationship/ fear of commitment/ self-confidence/ esteem as well as other spiritual self-help books.

You can talk as much as you want on forums but unless you take action your words of wanting help are meaningless.

Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 17:10

I've worked it out listening girl, he had just got with her when me n him slept together for the last time , so yes he has cheated

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Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 17:11

*lightening girl I mean .. And All thanks to Facebook, of course

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Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 17:13

They are exclusive , she left her husband for him

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curren · 15/03/2016 17:15

So you were sleeping with him and knew he had a girlfriend, he broke up with her and carried on sleeping with you. But it wasn't a relationship, he then went on and dates someone else and you are upset.

You knew you weren't in a relationship. So he hasn't cheated on you.

OP do what you want. Don't fool yourself it's for her though. This is for you to hurt him and her.

You can't tell from someone's Facebook page wether they are the type to blame the OW or tell if his kids like her. Either you are filling in the blanks yourself or you did indeed know about her and these are things he has told you.

JanetOfTheApes · 15/03/2016 17:23

So he got with her, she was still with her husband, he slept with you one more time, then she left her husband for him....

None of you comes off well. She's not some poor woman who doesn't know whats going on, she's a cheat. So is he. So, from the sound of it, are you, in a way.

Grow up, move on, and next time have a bit more self respect.

lighteningirl · 15/03/2016 17:24

OP I've been you I say this with total love and compassion stop fixating on men who don't love you find a nice single man who does. Don't settle for anyone who sees you as a booty call, don't settle for anyone who misuses alcohol or takes drugs or has debts or doesn't work. Set a high standard for the next man in your life and move on from this arsehole. Also delete all your 'proof' only you care he certainly doesn't and if you send or post videos or photos you may well find yourself with a criminal record.

Jux · 15/03/2016 17:29

Forget him. Leave it all in the past. Plan your life without him in it in any way at all.

ATM you are wasting energy on him. You could be planning how your Uni life will work, how you will manage things. You could be reading up background on your subject etc. Make yourself as productive in that way as you can. Evety time you catch him creeping into your thoughts tell yourself to stop and force your mind back to more productive thoughts. Be strong minded.

Original poster
Kimberley00001 · 15/03/2016 17:29

I've just thought.... Maybe she has an idea already... Since he's been with her he's deleted FB, whatsapp and now I'm blocked .. Hmm Confused

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