to think this might be a child protection/safe guarding issue?

[thickgit]

There's a nursery close by to me. Today, they were playing outside. I very clearly saw male nursery worker laying on his back on the ground, leaning up a bit on his elbows. One girl was laying on her front, on him. Another girl was laying on him, more on his chest.
It looked inappropriate to me so I immediately called nursery and told manager to go outside and see. She was more interested in knowing who I was.

I called back ten minutes later to give her my number. She wanted my name. I wouldn't give it. She was very defensive about the scenario and just wanted to know if I would feel the same if it was a woman. I explained that I've worked in nurseries and would not let children lay on me like this. She said other workers were out there, so she had no issue with it.
What are your thoughts?

I'm more than happy to let them make that decision. They are the ones who deal with these kind of scenarios and know how to respond to observations such as mine.

Ask for a copy of their safeguarding policy, then see if he breached it. If he didn't no problem.

ThatsnotMyRabbit. Report me if you think I'm a troll.

I would normally advocate reporting concerns too. And I think it's great that we're all more aware of child abuse and children's rights. But sometimes I worry that the pendulum has swung so far that paedophilia is read into innocent physical interactions. And that's potentially damaging too when kids in childcare need physical interaction. I worry we're going to end up in a situation where no childcare worker feels comfortable having physical contact with children in their care beyond the bare minimum. So the op complains about this guy and it's logged. Someone else looks in to the nursery garden and sees him chasing and tickling a child and thinks it's inappropriate. That's logged too. All these innocent interactions get logged and eventually everyone is too scared to do anything physical!

It's impossible to judge this particular incident as none of us saw it, but most of us get a feel for something that's just not quite right or appropriate - & if the op felt uneasy about what she saw then she was right to mention it. Personally, I'd love to see more males in early years childcare to redress the balance, but sadly not enough men are interested, & it's not just because of things like this, it's because the money is crap & it's a low status job with hardly any prospect of promotion.
But mumsnet is funny sometines, posters will happily hit the report button just because an anonymous adult has told another anonymous adult to fuck off, ( for example ) yet wrt a possible safeguarding incident the op is overreacting?

Just revisiting times when I've hugged men who are not my DH, which is frequently and I don't position myself any differently. Our genitalia would 'meet', readjusting would mean doing one of those creepy sideways hugs that the Duggars (17 kids and counting) used to enforce.

When I worked in a nursery I was frequently found on the floor with children lying on me. I'd move if their head was in my crotch or if they were grabbing my breasts but not in the situation you describe. That wouldn't bother me at all from a safeguarding point of view.

To be honest, I think reporting to the designated officer would go like this...

OP calls and tells them what she saw, designated officer calls the nursery manager who informs that she is aware of the concern, addressed this on the phone with OP and does not feel any inappropriate behaviour was exhibited by the staff member. Designated officer calls OP to advise that the nursery manager has been informed and there will be no further action from the Local Authority/no informing Ofsted etc.

The only difference will be if there are records of that particular staff member or nursery having issues in the past (which is unlikely but always possible).

I'm very interested op why you were observing children at a nursery your children were not attending in the first place. If you're observing then publically through a fence etc., then it begs the question of whom else is doing exactly the same thing. THIS is something you should be reporting.

Instead this thread is about your hang ups of males working in a childcare environment. Are you comfortable with males changing the children's nappies? Changing their clothes? Monitoring they are ok at the toilets?

Then report this thread

Oh don't worry. I have

OP Do you post as Spriggit too? Just seems a coincidence that two very controversial threads have been started by posters with GIT in their names ?

I might be overthinking

I'm fairly certain Ofsted and the LA safeguarding team will be fine with what you've described. They're not going to recommend more training just because you think they should.

Well as taking the lead on safeguarding is a major part of my job for the LA, then after investigation it is quite possible I would recommend additional staff training.

Insancerre - I've thought the same, especially in the light of another recent thread.

This is my first ever OP. . . In at the deep end!!
I wouldn't know how to name change even if I wanted to.

So posters saying 'what if he picked up a crying child' are going way off track, but you posting 'what if they were poking his penis' is not you going off track, eh?

Managing your hugs to avoid 'touching a clothed penis' and leaning back so your clothed boobs don't touch a man is fucking weird. Have you had counselling? Do you perhaps have some experience which you may be projecting on to other people? Most people do not sexualise everyday scenarios like you do, such as hugs and physical contact with nursery workers.

It is called play usually it is encouraged in nurseries.

Who said I lean back? How can I hug and lean back?
And who said my children don't go to that nursery?

If your children do go to that nursery then it's a fairly epic drip feed.

You don't "have a duty to take this further". A duty of care is a legal obligation that doesn't apply to you, a lay person. Using incorrect jargon doesn't help your case on this thread.

I understand why you felt uncomfortable but I am completely baffled as to why you wouldn't give your name. You care enough to report it but not enough to follow it through. The manager probably thought you were malicious, as opposed to actually concerned. You say you care about the kids but apparently not enough to actually do something vaguely helpful.

Do your children go to the nursery?

You even said 'food for thought' about the hugging/breast issue.

I honestly don't know why you started this thread. It was either to get as much as a reaction as possible - after all you have said we have all been rude and impolite but you keep coming back to goad with more details. Or it was so everyone would pat you on the back and say what an upstanding member of the community you are by reporting this frightful crime.

You havent once been able to put into clear words why what this man was doing was inappropriate.

Someone assumed my children don't go there. I'd never said that
I feel I have a duty.
If manager had said something more along the lines of
thank you for your call, we take any concerns/observations seriously. May I have your name and number in case we need to follow up and so that I can make a record, then no probs. Having read this thread, I'm pleased I decided not to leave my name. When I call whoever it is I decide to call, I will leave my name, address, date of birth etc She did not need my name. Simple.