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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is my husband correct

233 replies

Catvsworld · 10/03/2016 22:00

We are currently get ting our kitchen done and choose a IKEA kitchen witch have tall deep units lovey

We brought the legs that go with the kitchen units however the builder had said they weren't very sturdy and brought standard legs with make the units about 5cm higher than the standard

My husband is making be feel awful and feel quite bullied by him o can't sit all day and watch the builder I have 3 children and in any case I no nothing about building work the first day when he set the leg on husband came home said there a it high then said no more more work was then done work tops now on sink in and yesterday he complained at me I

Then said do you want me to say somthing to the builder he kept changing his mind then said no

Now today's he's telling me we waisted 5 grand most likely devalued our home and now most of the works been completed there's not much that can be done
Really gets me the Kitchen has had the high legs for a few days and he should of said then

He keeps saying its looks strange because the dishwasher and washing machine don't sit flush under the work top
It looks a little night but tbh it's a good hight for me cooking and chopping ect

Apart from stressing me out what's the blinking point of saying now I am sure even as late as yesterday I could of said somthing to the builder but he told me not to and I no he's just going to keep moaning about it for years to come

I did say when we come to sell witch won't be for at least 10 years we can replace the kitchen as most of the cost this time was knocking out a wall and re jigging the way the kitchen was set up

Have we waisted the money is this a awful mistake

Please note were about half way through the build everything else is fine

OP posts:
landrover · 10/03/2016 23:12

Shit Glo, you are right about plugging stuff in! Well OP you have a perfect reason for the worktop to be lowered! Take your toaster and plug it in for your builder to see!

TheOddity · 10/03/2016 23:13

Hmm now the sockets have been pointed out...that really isn't on. Anyone know the regs? If he has fucked that up, then he really needs to spend his time and money rectifying it.

GloGirl · 10/03/2016 23:13

YOU SHOULDNT PAY MONEY TO FIX IT

By the way, the kitchen fitter has thought "hmm, your kickboards won't loom right so ill raise all the units higher" to give you a 'standard' kickboard aesthetic.

In doing that he's buggered up your appliances and sockets etc. It's his responsibility to put it right.

Justaboy · 10/03/2016 23:14

The power sockets aren't that much of a job to raise up but one other matter comes to mind are their going to be any storage cabinets above the work top, and if so sure your not going to run out of space, they're not going the hit the ceiling?.

landrover · 10/03/2016 23:16

Building regs say sockets should be 150mm above worktop.

Mandatorymongoose · 10/03/2016 23:16

Just I think the OP measured to bottom of the work top so 950mm = 845mm for the machine + 105mm gap (990mm being right to the top of the work top adding on the extra 40mm) would be spot on.

Catvsworld · 10/03/2016 23:17

Yes ladies just googled the sockets and you are correct I text my builder

He's rung me straight back said the sockets will be sorted
ASAP and he's glad I had said before it was tiled

Also he said he could raise the white goods and wrap the kick bored round

OP posts:
landrover · 10/03/2016 23:18

Ahhh that great news for you, just make sure that you have enough clearance for wall units xx

CockwombleJeff · 10/03/2016 23:18

I'm with Maryz on this.

Please don't distress yourself over this OP.

You have a lovely big kitchen - I have a gap above my dishwasher - I love it! I've been creative with it and used it as storage for dishwasher items.

Op you have coped like a trooper with the upheaval of building work and babies - I'm sure you are feeling drained and fragile - so stop being harsh on yourself .

For all those saying it would drive them crazy - only if you let it. Please try to get some sleep, distract yourself from thinking about this so much and do some self soothing activities to help you feel calmer about things 💐

Catvsworld · 10/03/2016 23:19

NICEIC reccommend min height of 100mm above worktop. Mainly this is to allow cables to not be under strain when bent.

We shall be talking more tomorrow

OP posts:
Chippednailvarnish · 10/03/2016 23:19

You shouldn't need to ask him, he shouldn't have done it without checking first and he should know the regulations.

Are you having wall cabinets?

Catvsworld · 10/03/2016 23:20

Not haveing wall units ladies on a wall you can't see in the photos I have 3 massive larder units

OP posts:
Catvsworld · 10/03/2016 23:22

I won't be paying for the electrics he will have to take that up with his sparky

OP posts:
Maryz · 10/03/2016 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Justaboy · 10/03/2016 23:30

Can I just suggest that before anyone has work like this done that "someone" does the drawings and determines where each and every bit goes before work starts as it is a royal PITA to put matter right after work has started and as Catvsworld and her hubbie are the clients then they Both ought to agree with whoever planned it, if indeed anyone did, where it all out to finish to and how it ought to look as there are quite a few software packages out these days to do just that.

Seems there's been a sort of communication breakdown on the go;!.

Never mind that happens every day with the builders!.

BTW for what its worth the kickboard is referred to as a Plinth in kitchen fitting speak normally 150 mm high can be cut down and sometimes can be supplied or cut from other board to be then as high as you want.

Arkwright · 10/03/2016 23:30

It will look better but it won't be "right". The appliances should be on the floor not raised up. It would annoy me every time I looked at it. I hope your builder rectifies it for you.

MrsArthurShappey · 10/03/2016 23:33

Were the sockets put in before the worktop? Because the electrician probably put them in the right place in that case. They're only too close because the worktop is too high.

Justaboy · 10/03/2016 23:34

Catvsworld Can you tell me just how you texted your builder at 23:17 hrs and got a reply out of him! whatever did you put in the text;?.

mathanxiety · 10/03/2016 23:38

Tell DH next time you get a new kitchen he can stay home with the builders and a few small children while you get to swan off to work every day and then come back and make remarks about decimating the house value.

I love Maryz's idea of a slot under the worktop above the dishwasher and washing machine for flat cooking pans, etc.

It's probably a good idea to have a bit of clearance above the dishwasher with a wooden counter above that as steam and heat can have an effect on wood above appliances that use hot water.

If the counter is a good height for you to work at then that surely counts for something too?

To be honest, the only element of your kitchen that I would do something about is the sharp corner of the countertop at the right of the dishwasher, and the way the sink is in a little alcove. I can imagine bumping myself off that sharp corner quite a bit. I would have it rounded.

Flowers -- having a renovation is bad at the best of times, but when you have little ones and it's the kitchen it is exponentially worse. Maybe you are both really stressed by the whole operation. DH still needs to get a grip though.

ZenNudist · 10/03/2016 23:42

Have you paid him already? Because then you're really screwed.

The builder has bodged it up good & proper. That is not standard way to fit a kitchen . He has deviated from your instructions to fit an ikea kitchen using ikea fittings.

It looks bad and no way should you be raising appliances on som kind of plinth, what will you do if you need to pull one out to fix or replace it? Total PITA.

There's no way I could live with that gap. He needs to lower the worktop and you should not have to pay.

I'm pretty sure you could sue for the cost of putting it right but cowboy builders are notoriously slippery.

You really do have to stay on top of things and check work as it progresses. If something isn't to your liking trades people will often explain why their way is right and try and guilt you into putting up with mistakes. You have to be firm and deal with problems as they arise.

Sorry not making you feel any better here. I think you need to take it as a life lesson. It's yours and your dh's responsibility. Set dh on the builder!!!

unlucky83 · 10/03/2016 23:47

Hmmm I think raising the sockets is more of a big job than dropping the work tops...especially if that is a solid wall not plasterboard - (they will have chase out - make a channel in the brickwork - for the cables and then chisel out for the backboxes - all above your nice new worktop (risk of damaging it) ...plus the plaster dust mess. Then fill and plaster up in the holes from the old socket backboxes and plaster over the cable chase.
I doubt there is an extra 5+ cm of cable to run up to the new socket -assuming they can pull it through if its buried in the wall.
If they can't, they have to put extra length in...could be done - just don't think its ideal (they'd have to use a connector strip - which I think needs to be accessible so you would have to put it in a backbox with a blanking plate - kind of a socket without plug holes/switches above it ...so that would be below your real sockets - it would look a mess....)

(Different if they needed to lower them ...that would be slightly simpler)
Actually hard to tell from the photo but are you having surface mounted (sticking out) sockets rather than flush (almost flat to the wall) ones - that would be simpler (don't need to bury the backboxes) but then IMO isn't as attractive or practical -put it this way DIYers are more likely to use surface mounted...

CiderwithBuda · 10/03/2016 23:48

Did the builder ask you if he should replace the legs or did he do it off his own bat? If he didn't ask you he doesn't have a leg to stand on (Grin) about changing it.

He obv didn't think it through to have the electrician put the sockets where they are.

PerspicaciaTick · 10/03/2016 23:49

Um - are you and your DH both really tall? You might find it uncomfortable using such high units if you are more average height.

Bogeyface · 10/03/2016 23:58

Whether the work tops are at the right height or not is irrelevant.

The fact is that your H refused to take time off to project manage, when asked said that he didnt want you to say anything and then moaned when you didnt say anything!

To answer your OP, no he isnt correct and yes he is being very fucking unreasonable!

Italiangreyhound · 11/03/2016 00:00

I'm not going to comment on the kitchen because that's not really my thing, and I hate spending time in kitchens!

But I do think it is appalling your husband has been bullying to you about this.

You certainly cannot watch the builders ever minute.

Presumably there are plans, which your dh agreed. So ask/tell the builder to stick to the plans, or get your dh to do so by phone or in person.

I have not read all the posts.

Good luck with your new kitchen but most of all good luck getting your dh to cut you some slack and working together with you and not against you. Thanks