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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to not give DD a pile of gifts for Easter?

221 replies

johalgh · 09/03/2016 13:19

DD is 7 and will receive an egg, an Easter cuddly and maybe a couple of Easter themed trinket type things if I see anything nice. But I know on Easter Sunday Facebook will be filled with photographs of piles of stuff that give Christmas a run for it's money. Am I being mean? It was a single egg in my day...

OP posts:
SpringerS · 11/03/2016 11:53

What is the problem with families doing what they want to do? If people want to have a low key Easter, great, go for it. If others want to do something bigger and more 'Christmas like' good for them. As it is Easter is a much bigger celebration in most of Europe where decorations, card exchanging and gift giving is the norm in many countries. The Easter Bunny, for example, is not an American invention it comes from Germany. In fact in early Victorian Britain gift giving was the norm at Easter, with small gifts, toys and treats being placed inside decorative eggs. It's not some crazy Americanisation of the holiday. Americans just have a bigger celebration due to the fact that as they are a culture made up of various emigrant cultures they have been able to take all the best bits of celebrations from all the countries that their population originates from. The chocolate Easter egg has only been around for about 150 years and usurped the gift giving tradition thanks to the commercial ambitions of the chocolate companies. So it's not as if modern families eschewing gifts but increasing the profits of food giants like Mondeléz International Inc, Nestlé S.A. or Mars Inc. is one in the eye for encroaching commercialism!?!

Eggs have pretty much nothing to do with Jesus anyway (apart from the 'retcon' story of Mary Magdalene and her magic colour changing eggs that she is supposed to have taken to the Roman emperor). They are instead a widely held focal point of the spring celebration used by numerous human cultures for thousands and thousands of years, from the Indo-Iranian Zoroastrians, to the Persian originating Nowruz, to Egyptian Sham el-Nessim, to the Hebrew Pesach eggs on the Sedar Plate, to the European worship of the goddess Eostre. In European Christianity during the middle ages, eggs were forbidden during Lent so in order not to waste the eggs the chickens produced, families boiled them and saved them for Easter. And in order to add to the fast breaking celebration decorating the eggs during Holy Week became tradition. The Mary Magdalene egg legend eventually came about to explain the connection. And chocolate, a fairly recently invented confection derived from a South American plant has absolutely nothing at all to do with any religion and is only attached to Easter as most people find it delicious and like to use it to accentuate any holiday they enjoy.

The spring celebration has long predated Christianity and will long outlive it. It's the normal human condition to create communal celebrations, to enjoy festivities together and, especially at a time of seasonal renewal, to celebrate our children. So if you want to decorate your home and send Easter cards, if you want to have the Easter Bunny come, if you want to give your child chocolate, organise an egg hunt and/or a great big basket of toys, then go for it and don't feel bad. If you want to keep it simple and go to church in a new outfit, dye a few eggs and eat a little chocolate, then go for it and don't feel bad. The only thing people should feel bad for is mud-slinging and inventing crazy accusations about people who do things differently.

CrystalMcPistol · 11/03/2016 11:56

How long did you spend on that?

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 11/03/2016 12:01

Are you the Easter bunny springerShockLive and let live I say. I decorate my dining room at Easter but don't do presents, just an egg each for the dc.

SpringerS · 11/03/2016 12:02

I clock about 70 wpm so about 8 minutes. :)

CrystalMcPistol · 11/03/2016 12:04

I disagree that Americans celebrate Easter in a big way. In my experience it's one 'holiday' that they're remarkably indifferent to.

SpringerS · 11/03/2016 12:20

I suppose America is a big place with various cultures being dominant in different areas. Most of my American friends had much bigger Easter celebrations than those I grew up with. It was much more Christmas like for them with visits to the Easter Bunny at the mall on the run up to Easter, as the Easter Bunny was very 'real' and Santa like to them. And they got a basket of toys and filled plastic eggs from him on Easter morning.

CamboricumMinor · 11/03/2016 12:50

My DCs will get an Easter Egg each. Why would they need anything else?

EachToHerOwn · 11/03/2016 13:17

I won't be buying ours anything. DM has already bought them eggs to last the year, so we'll do an Easter egg hunt with them! No other gifts either. Finis!

shovetheholly · 11/03/2016 13:49

Can I ask how many of you get Easter eggs from your PIL as adults?

MIL does this for us, and I am torn between thinking she's only trying to be nice and finding it very infantilising.

MadameDePompom · 11/03/2016 13:52

She's trying to be nice. An adult giving another adult an Easter egg is a pretty normal thing.

twins2004 · 11/03/2016 14:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheScottishPlay · 11/03/2016 16:30

The eggs are for rolling, symbolising the stone rolling from Jesus' tomb.

notonyurjellybellynelly · 11/03/2016 16:32

I give an Easter Egg to all 5 of my children and their partners, as well as my grandchildren. They're all Muslims.

I do it because of the fabulous memories I have of Easter as a wee girl and Im really fortunate that when it comes to Christmas, and Easter, and Mothers Day, that my lot are more than happy to share my wee walk down memory lane with me.

notonyurjellybellynelly · 11/03/2016 16:35

The eggs are for rolling, symbolising the stone rolling from Jesus' tomb

Thank you for that. Smile You're about the only other person Ive come across who knows that.

I have the nicest memories of rolling my egg down a hill in Scotland thinking of Jesus and praying it didnt land in a pile of sheep pooh or worst still - a big coos pancake. Grin

Jesabel · 11/03/2016 16:37

Lol, yeah the eggs are definitely all about Jesus and nothing to do with fertility. And the Jesus Bunny.

notquitehuman · 11/03/2016 16:38

I got an e-mail the other day suggesting I order new furniture in time for Easter. Apparently my family won't have a nice Easter Sunday dinner unless I buy a new table and chairs. It's like the bloody pre-xmas sofa ads!

I usually make DS a little basket with a couple of fun little treats, but don't bother with presents. Some family members do stuff like buy new outfits for the kids, spend hours doing crafts, put on massive eggs hunts etc. Just too much hassle for me. I'm a terrible mother.

Moomintroll85 · 11/03/2016 16:47

I might get my DS an egg when he's older or bung a few eggs in the garden for him to look for, haven't given it much thought yet as he's only 18months. Easter really isn't a thing to us though, I'll be lucky if I know when it is each year to be honest.

My mum gives me and DP some sort of chocolate at easter. God knows why. She came round yesterday and brought it as I won't see her again before easter. We've already eaten them Blush

MuddlingMackem · 11/03/2016 17:46

Another one here with a DC with a birthday too close to Christmas, so we do a few gifts instead of an egg from us as they get eggs from the rest of the family.

When they were younger they'd get a couple of toys, now they generally get books. However, they sometimes get a few other bits that we've picked up as and when at charity shops, and instead of just giving them straight to them we'll put them to one side for Easter / Birthday / Christmas, whichever is the next occasion. :)

thesockgap · 11/03/2016 17:55

We give our 3 boys an Easter bag which usually contains one proper Easter egg, plus a selection of Easter themed chocolates and sweets such as Haribo bunnies, those Malteaster things, and little Crème eggs, Lindor eggs etc. Total cost I'd say about £7 or £8 each, that's well enough to spend when multiplied by 3! Couldn't afford to buy them actual presents too!

They usually get a lot of eggs off extended family too (they have 13 sets of Aunties/Uncles and a lot of older cousins) so no need for us to go ott in buying loads! The chocolate supply lasts until about May half term as it is!

NotCitrus · 11/03/2016 21:11

I used to get an Easter basket hidden somewhere in my American aunt's huge rambling house - my cousins and I often took all day to track everyone's down! Would usually be a couple bits of craft stuff plus a chocolate egg, mini eggs, jelly beans and marshmallow Peeps.

So I do baskets too with bits of tat and some sweets and an egg, and have ended up with a Tradition of a treasure hunt with written clues, because a couple years ago we were trying to persuade ds to read! Amazing how he got the hang of reading if there was chocolate at the end... Also go to a couple local easter egg hunts resulting in £1 eggs, just for the fun outdoors activity.

My kids are actually pretty good at self-regulation of eating sweets, so put most of their stuff away to have a bit each night. Chocolate from other people somehow disappears and gets eaten by me!

My parents did end up buying my dc cuddly toys last year when they stayed over, which I didn't approve of but said toys have become favourites for both of them.

rhetorician · 11/03/2016 21:14

never heard of this - eggs, yes, chocolate yes, and a small gift from those relatives thoughtful enough to realise that we don't want them to have a mountain of choc...

allegretto · 11/03/2016 21:16

One chocolate egg each here.

notquitehuman · 11/03/2016 21:44

I've just discovered that you can buy easter jumpers. How long until easter jumper day becomes a thing at school?

ample · 12/03/2016 08:16

No toys bought at Easter unless we need a new swingball/trampoline net etc which we would normally buy around this time of year. They are not Easter gifts though.
We used to buy DD one egg in a box but they are just all packaging and not worth it. Each summer we would have leftover unopened eggs which was a waste whereas the mini treat packets go down well in our house so we buy a few packets of those instead.
It wouldn't bother me what people brag about on fb. Worthy of a few eyerolls maybe but it's their money to waste Smile

Have you seen the £40 chocolate eggs in M&S?! £40!

Sniv · 12/03/2016 09:22

Valiant attempt from the shops to make it Christmas II

The section of Easter cards in Clinton's was startlingly massive - seemed as big as the section they had for Mother's Day. Bizarre - I've never received an Easter card nor sent one.

There's also massive selections of Christmas-decoration style hanging ornaments, bunting, and decorative knick knacks. Those fluffy yellow chicks have diversified since I was a kid - I've seen about 5 different size options, pastel coloured ones, rainbow coloured ones, ones wearing glasses and moustaches, ones on tiny clips... I guess some people buy this stuff for egg hunts and easter bonnets, but thankfully I've not seen many people just coat their houses in it a la xmas.

Hopefully Easter will always be reasonably cheap and simple. I bought big kinder bunnies for everyone for £2.50 each, will paint some eggs, and have some hot cross buns and some roast lamb.

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