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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend overdosed. Wtf to do?

227 replies

Littlefluffyclouds81 · 29/02/2016 19:31

My friend/neighbour has not been answering her phone all day and I just went to check on her. She's had a bit of a shit time of it lately so I was worried.

Found her in bed (I've got a key). She's taken 15 tramadol last night. She was trying to end it. She is conscious and pissed off that she's still here. Her head is hurting and she's feeling sick. I said she needs to go to hospital but she got really angry and said she will never forgive me if I call an ambulance. She said if she still feels bad tomorrow she'll go then.

I guess if she was going to die that would have happened by now but I'm worried she could have caused herself some serious damage. I've taken all the pills I can find in the house away from her and said I'll be back to check on her once dd2 is in bed. I really think she needs to get checked over but she is not at all happy with that suggestion. What should I do?

OP posts:
shazzarooney99 · 29/02/2016 21:35

So you still diddnt phone an ambulance? seriously? what was the point of phoning 111? why on earth diddnt you just phone an ambulance? the damage to the liver could be that bad it could kill her, is this better than her falling out with you? crazy old world we live in!

almondpoisson · 29/02/2016 21:35

You know, assisting suicide is a criminal offence. I know you are not, but if you don't do everything you can when she is at such high risk I don't think it's the right call. I think you really need to call an ambulance. Failing that, get on the phone to Samaritans. Medically, also, she may not be fine and delayed OD reactions are not uncommon at varying degrees of severity.

SealSong · 29/02/2016 21:35

Mental health practitioner here. You MUST call an ambulance. She doesn't have to consent, the paramedics can manage that.

I can't say this strongly enough - SHE COULD DIE

She might still be suicidal and might take a further overdose when you go. Or the liver damage might kill her.

YOU MUST CALL AN AMBULANCE. Just go outside and do it. Don't sit there trying to talk her round.

almondpoisson · 29/02/2016 21:37

I agree she does not need to consent to the ambulance - her life is in danger. She will be highly unlikely to consent, or be talked around, if she's actively suicidal.

TendonQueen · 29/02/2016 21:39

She is NOT able to make informed, independent decisions under the influence of the tablets. Call an ambulance and let the professionals handle it.

Alisvolatpropiis · 29/02/2016 21:39

I cannot believe you haven't just called an ambulance.

WeveGotAHomelessLove · 29/02/2016 21:42

Seriously why havent you just phoned an ambulance??? Just do it

Palomb · 29/02/2016 21:42

I can't believe an 111 nurse would have told you that.

ShesGotLionsInHerHeart · 29/02/2016 21:43

FFS typical MN ambulance hysteria!! She has spoken to someone who has given advice. Don't bully the OP off the thread, she's doing her best.

Assisting a suicide for fucks sake. Hmm

TealLove · 29/02/2016 21:44

Oh Ffs
Just call an ambulence !!! You're friend could still go into kidney failure just call !

almondpoisson · 29/02/2016 21:44

111 isn't staffed by nurses.

call an ambulance OP

wonkylampshade · 29/02/2016 21:46

I spoke to a nurse on 111 a fortnight ago.

hahawoteva · 29/02/2016 21:47

Your friend needs help now before it's too late.

A very close family member took a paracetamol overdose and it was several days before they knew if their liver had been damaged. It was a very awful time for them and us. Luckily we got them to hospital in time.
This was not the first time either.

almondpoisson · 29/02/2016 21:48

Nobody's bullying OP. I'm just staggered that this isn't ringing a 'life or death emergency situation' alarm enough to call an ambulance. I know some people say that people can choose to end their own lives, and do so rationally. But this is not the situation that OP describes, and by entering into negotiation, and worse, perhaps saying it's fine not to go and get help, this may inadvertently convey a message of acceptance/ condone it/ convey that it's not bad enough to warrant help and she needs to try harder next time.
I know OP has asked for advice, but many people have said to call an ambulance and frankly, friendship dynamics are a little irrelevant when the friend in question is deceased.

ShesGotLionsInHerHeart · 29/02/2016 21:48

It's a mixture of nurses and not.

ShesGotLionsInHerHeart · 29/02/2016 21:49

Yes but lots of Internet ransoms saying 'call an ambulance' means bugger all in reality. She's got a medical opinion which says no ambulance required.

almondpoisson · 29/02/2016 21:49

It's overseen by nurses and paramedics, but majority of call handlers are not medically qualified. NHS Direct was staffed by nurses/qualified persons fully.

ShesGotLionsInHerHeart · 29/02/2016 21:49

Randoms! Not ransoms...

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 29/02/2016 21:50

I hope it is not the OP who has taken the tablets Sad

TealLove · 29/02/2016 21:51

She shouldn't be drinking tea falling asleep she needs to be checked over
She shouldn't be drinking anything until you've been assessed by a HP

VoldysGoneMouldy · 29/02/2016 21:51

She tried to kill herself less than twenty four hours ago, and you're trusting she's okay because you've made her a cup of tea?

Fucking hell.

almondpoisson · 29/02/2016 21:51

I don't think it's fair on OP to have to live with consequences if something goes wrong. This requires highly skilled intervention both physiologically if damage has been done/ is occurring and psychologically. Her friend is in absolute crisis and doing nothing isn't going to make this go away. It's not fair to expect OP to chaperone her 24/7 and make sure she doesn't do this again, or to check she's breathing through the night, or to monitor her over the next few days. It's not OP's job.

almondpoisson · 29/02/2016 21:55

OP: Friend overdosed. Wtf to do?
Answer: call an ambulance

{echoed by many}

I don't think it's a time to mince words, it's a life or death situation, still, irrespective of what damage the OD has caused - both the current effects of the OD, and the friend's current suicidality are very imminent risks to life. There's not a lot more to say. And feeling sleepy isn't a very good sign.

Original poster
Littlefluffyclouds81 · 29/02/2016 21:57

I did speak to a nurse on 111. They put me straight through to one.

OP posts:
SealSong · 29/02/2016 21:57

ShesGotLions, if you read the last post from the OP it does not say that 111 direct said 'no ambulance needed'. It actually says that OP was advised that ideally the person who took the overdose needs to go to hospital tonight.
That will be because a) she may still be suicidal b) she may be at risk from the liver damage. Just because the immediate risk from the tablets might have passed that does not mean that there might not still be serious risk,