DCs love it and I normally enjoy it more or less but tonight's! Aaargh!
Interminable intro with them high-fiving everyone in sight for what felt like ten minutes. I said to the DCs I though this bit was "self-indulgent." The word I would have used, but didn't, was "wanky."
Appalling woman who has told terrible lies. Errr ok but one of them was possibly criminal (claiming 3 months on the sick when she just wanted time off. WTF?) so is she going to face repercussions? She said to ex-boss "haven't seen you for AGES!" (Yeah since I sacked you for gross misconduct)
Surprising tired lady who works in ASDA; poor woman totally scared and bewildered. "Is this the best night of your whole life???!!" they kept demanding, sounded almost threatening: it bloody better be, love, after all the effort we've been to, never mind you're dead on your feet and never watch us anyway you're on TELLY and you better bloody well be GRATEFUL.
Poor chap on the cooking bit "I hated you" etc, how his little face fell and how HILARIOUS they found it.
Little Mix bit - DD had been waiting for this - I thought it was great how they gave their song the Wild West treatment but of course one could not possibly be allowed to enjoy that when there were Ant and Dec in hats and moustaches to be fawned over instead.