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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to fall for a very old friend?

531 replies

ThisRainWasOnceTheSea · 27/02/2016 00:08

So I can't talk to my IRL friends about this as we are a close knit group and I'm worried about it going wrong. But I am in a bit of a pickle.

I recently met up with a man I have been friends with for years but for one reason or another, haven't seen for the last couple of years. We have been out for dinner and/or drinks about 5 times in the last couple of weeks, sometimes alone, sometimes with friends.

The time before last we were mistaken for a couple by a drunk old boy trying to make conversation. Neither of us corrected him - keen to escape - but I kind of glowed when he referred to me as 'your lady', to my friend. When we left I was suddenly overwhelmed with an urge to kiss him goodbye. (I bottled it and kissed his cheek. Unusual for us as we are both very reserved and a bit awkward.)

We ran into each other last night and had a drink. I had bailed on a very big fancy party, and he was surprised but pleased to see me. I went home at the end of the night and kept waking up in the night trying to make sense of it all.

We are around the same age, he is a little older, and both single. He is painfully shy (I think he has only had one serious girlfriend) and I have a (frankly undeserved) reputation as being a bit of a slapper. We share interests, can sit and talk all night, text almost every day. I don't want to jump him - he would run for the hills - but I can't shake the quiet realisation that I may be falling in love with my kind, shy, gentle friend.

Where do I go from here?

OP posts:
OTheHugeManatee · 01/03/2016 17:57

Not placemarking at all, oh no Grin

ShesGotLionsInHerHeart · 01/03/2016 18:02

Oh I LOVE this thread.

This was me and DH 10 years ago. Then he sent me a letter.

Sigh. Grin

Goingtobeawesome · 01/03/2016 18:03

Thursday? Thursday?

That's just mean. Why not tomorrow? Why not tonight?! Making us wait you meanie Grin.

ChubbyKitty · 01/03/2016 18:07

Ooh exciting Grin

I really hope this all works out for the best OP!

2016namechangecomingalong · 01/03/2016 18:28

Fingers crossed for you 😊

PirateSmile · 01/03/2016 18:30

Shesgot
What was in the letter?!!!

ConkersDontScareSpiders · 01/03/2016 18:36

I've been lurking on here-oh I do hope he replies and says yes!!!

ThisRainWasOnceTheSea · 01/03/2016 18:50

IT'S ON.

lion I almost did a letter. I still might as I am Unbelievably Shit in person but quite a letter writer... I had a mild fantasy about handing it to him at the end of the night with a kiss - there's a lot I feel I need to say. Apologising for the silence, the Bastard, explaining why it's taken so long... I might draft it to help me get my own head in order before Thurs, even if it never makes it out of my jacket pocket...!

Two days. necks Berrocca and vodka

OP posts:
ThisRainWasOnceTheSea · 01/03/2016 18:53

Periodic polite request to MN HQ not to feature this thread on social media, thanks. He's not an MNer but some of our mutual friends would get it in a flash from timings and identifying details

OP posts:
ThisRainWasOnceTheSea · 01/03/2016 18:57

Also now plotting where to eat that gets me walked home... Grin

OP posts:
Yellowbird54321 · 01/03/2016 19:02

Just a tiny little place mark - Good Luck OP Smile

cattychatty · 01/03/2016 19:15

THURSDAY!! Noooooo that's forever away!

usual · 01/03/2016 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

colander1 · 01/03/2016 19:24

Blatant place marking. I'm just an old (not that old!) romantic and can't wait to hear the next installment. Get well soon - you need to be snot-free by Thursday!

OSETmum · 01/03/2016 19:26

Ooh this is literally my favourite ever thread 😍😍😍

Albaalba · 01/03/2016 19:33

Talking for hours and hours (do you get shitty looks from the waitresses?), putting the world to rights, getting mistaken for a couple... All sounds familiar to me.

Remember even if you try things and they don't work out then it doesn't mean you lose your best friend. My best friend and I tried this experiment, a few times. It didn't work out, not compatible in practical ways. We are both happy with other partners now. We still talk all night, go on 'dates' and put the world to rights (and get mistaken for a couple which means when I go to same place with dh the staff think I'm cheating, which is awkward).

Do it or I can guarantee you will always wonder what if.

stealtheatingtunnocks · 01/03/2016 19:36

living my life vicariously...

Carry on, please.

stillstandingatthebusstop · 01/03/2016 19:39

Thursday?????? Just realised it's Tuesday. I can't wait till Thursday Sad

ShesGotLionsInHerHeart · 01/03/2016 19:53

You should totally do a letter!! I still take mine out every once in a while and grin over it.

It just said how he had been in love with me for years, every time his phone rang he hoped it was me, etc etc. Blush

PirateSmile · 01/03/2016 19:58

I bet you know every line of that letter, Shesgot Smile

FuckYouJamieOliver · 01/03/2016 20:02

This is my favourite MN thread
If you don't update OP with the full complete details I shall find you ....... Just saying Grin

ShesGotLionsInHerHeart · 01/03/2016 20:10

Maybe Pirates...

It's such a lovely thing to look back in and remember just how I felt when I read it. It makes my heart full.

Do it OP!!!

imustbepatient · 01/03/2016 20:15

Such a wonderful heart warming thread. Good luck OP, I've got my fingers firmly crossed that this is the start of the most amazing relationship for you.

quietbatperson · 01/03/2016 20:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThisRainWasOnceTheSea · 01/03/2016 20:23

usual I don't think they would but it's better to be clear than to be sorry isn't it?

OP posts:
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